


This is our home now

by LexaSofia



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Clexa, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:14:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 45,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28922682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexaSofia/pseuds/LexaSofia
Summary: After failing the test Clarke returns to the planet Earth to find that she doesn't have to live alone anymore.However after wars, losses and pain, leaving in peace requires a new adjustment especially after how Clarke failed her test and who the judge was.As Clarke copes with her several losses she also finds new reasons to enjoy her life on earth.This fic takes place exactly after the series finale.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Octavia Blake/Levitt
Comments: 107
Kudos: 137





	1. Coming home

**Author's Note:**

> Hey peeps!  
> Well first of all let me give my friend Jo a huge thanks for her support, patience and help on this fic! As usual this wouldn't be possible without her.  
> Now this is a short fic that was born of my need for closure after The 100 series finale!  
> It won't be as long as my previous work and the plot is mainly Clarke centered and her Journey after judgement Day.  
> I'm not even sure if this makes total sense but when the series ended I had the urge to write it and so I did, this had been pretty much done for a while but only now Jo and I were able to work on it to post it.  
> I hope you guys like it.  
> Kudos and comments are always welcome!  
> Love you all and stay safe!

**Chapter 1 – Coming home**

_"There she is."_

Murphy says as he spots Clarke and smiles at her, Niylah and Emori lift their heads to look at the blonde as Clarke turns around one more time to see her but Lexa has vanished already and Clarke sighs willing herself not to cry. She's not alone after all, but she would like to look at Lexa's face just one more time even if it's not Lexa anymore. After years of having just Lexa's memory, of drawing her face countless times it was indescribable to see her again. Even though it wasn't Lexa, her Lexa, Clarke still held the being in her arms and felt the warmth of her body when she embraced her at the start of the test.

Clarke knew as soon as she hugged her that it wasn't her Lexa, but she couldn't stop herself from pulling her into her arms. The blonde felt a sense of comfort by doing so and it was as if a new door was being open for her, one she didn’t get the chance to look at it. It was also painful; one old scar that never has healed fully. Clarke never had the time to mourn for the people she lost, her mother, Finn, Bellamy, and even Madi not to mention Lexa. And seeing the woman in front of her just opened the dam, Clarke takes comfort in the knowledge that Madi chose to not come back, she found peace, and as like any other parent, Clarke has to accept that, even though it hurts.

As everyone hugs Clarke, with Murphy and Raven being the first ones in line Clarke thinks back to all the events that lead to this moment; all the fights and wars, the dead, the pain and loss. The blonde woman feels assuaged by the fact that her friends came back, for her and them, for the life and expectations they had when they first came to earth but still Clarke wonders how they went from years of fighting or relying on technology to end up by having their fates decided by a higher power.

Now for some reason, her friends are back, her family and as they set camp on the lakeshore Clarke smiles thinking that even if they don't transcend and there's no offspring they will still be at peace at their home. This will be the first day of the rest of their lives.

**

It's been two weeks since judgment day and the group is still camping on the lakeshore. They have years to come and Clarke wonders if they should find a new place to settle in, there have been conversations about going back to Sanctum, where they could use the palace as residency but the earth is their home, at least for most of them it is, but not all of them though. Levitt is still surprised at how the earth really feels; he has been in constant awe with the surroundings, the wind, the chirping birds, the colors and smells.

The day before it had rained during the night and when Clarke woke up she found Levitt already outside their tents with his eyes closed and a huge soft smile on his face. He had said he never felt that in Bardo, the strong effects of weather and the freedom of being able to walk outside with no fear. He had blushed by admitting this but said that the reality was far more pleasant than the memories he has seen in Bardo and although Clarke knew what he meant, how he had poke and probe in memories that weren’t his to see, she still had smiled at him kindly, it is all in the past now.

Clarke’s mind wanders back to that conversation with Levitt and even if by killing Cadogan she failed her test she couldn't truly say she regretted it. Clarke supposes that in the end, it wasn't her that was meant to save the human race, after all, her mother had told her when she was sent to the ground that it was in her nature to protect others and she did so as she knew and could but in the end, Raven was always a beacon of light, their real savior in countless of times. There's some kind of poetic justice in that.

_"What are you thinking about?"_

Raven asks as if on cue as she sits on the wooden trunk and Clarke looks at her with a smile.

_"I was thinking about you."_

The blonde says and Raven looks quizzically at her.

_"I was thinking of all the times you saved us, I… I failed the test but you didn't and for that I'm thankful, you helped Madi reach peace."_

Clarke says earnestly and Raven sighs, they haven't talked about what happened, not exactly and at the woman's words, Raven shakes her head slightly.

_"It wasn't just me, I might have been the one taking the test but it was Octavia who was able to show them that we could be better. She stopped the war even when your mother didn't think it was possible."_

_"You saw my mother?"_

Clarke asks with surprise and Raven looks at her, even the Latina doesn't fully understand all that happened but she managed to have an idea of why Abby was the one there.

_"I suppose that on some level the judge takes the form of someone that we hold dear in our hearts, a loved one, in my case it was Abby, it could have been Finn or Sinclair but Abby… She was like a mother to me too, in ways my mother wasn't."_

The woman says and Clarke nods but remains silent letting her gaze fall on the lake with the sunrise casting colors around them.

_"Who did you see?"_

Raven asks after a few minutes in silence and Clarke closes her eyes and breathes out.

_"Lexa."_

It's all that the blonde can manage and Raven's heart sinks a little, they might be at peace now but there are traumas of the past that will haunt them for years.

_"Levitt said that only the living can transcend. When you were there…"_

Clarke says trailing off as her hand gestures vaguely in the air and she looks at Raven.

_"Did you… did you see or feel the others, the ones we lost? I mean the disciples thought transcendence would come from the last war but they were wrong."_

Clarke says, her eyes tearing up with emotion, and Raven sighs.

_"I don't know what to tell you, all I remember was that I had this vast knowledge at my disposal and felt at peace… It's hard to explain, I've always been able to put puzzles together, to understand my surroundings, technology that's easy to work with, but being part of a group of consciousness that share one mind in the universe, we're the universe it's far more complicated than I thought."_

Raven says and Clarke nods as the Latina places one hand on her shoulder and squeezes it slightly. Octavia and Levitt come out of their tent at the same time Hope and Jordan join them.

_"They will never be able to have kids."_

Clarke says looking at the place where her friends are and Raven follows her eyes with a sigh.

_"We chose to come back; we knew it would require sacrifices."_

_"Haven't we sacrificed enough?"_

Clarke says and Raven looks at her with a sad smile.

_"Perhaps, but just so you know we did it not just because of you but for ourselves too. For once we will be able to live in a world with no wars and in peace, we might not transcend but at least we had the opportunity of living as we want to."_

With that Raven squeezes Clarke's shoulder one more time and stands to join their friends.

**

A week pass by in a blur, Clarke at first thought that time would go by slower, without the rush of jumping from planet to planet and moon and without all the consuming problems time would still, and yet as everyone was settling in their newfound peace and with all the tasks everyone had to do daily, time seemed to go by as fast as always.

On a rare occasion of loneliness, Clarke decides to take a walk through the woods in the surrounding forest. Her mind is still reeling from everything that happened between Sanctum and Bardo; it’s not like she’s unhappy, she has been content with her new life but many nights are still plagued with dreams or nightmares rather of her past events, Bellamy getting shot, Madi pliant and unmoving in her arms, the blood on her hands, Finn's blood turning dark like Lexa's.

_"Such a curious species indeed."_

That voice, Clarke stops at the sound of it, it's foolish and she knows it but she can't help but feel her heart hammering in her chest just because she's hearing Lexa's voice. The blonde turns around to see Picasso wagging her tail and walking around the vivid image of Lexa.

_"She can see you?"_

Clarke asks dumbfounded and the being smiles at her.

_"Not exactly, we are only visible to the subjects of our tests, animals can… let's say sense me. Or rather sense my presence."_

Clarke nods at this and then frowns looking at the being in front of her, Lexa smiles and nods, motioning gently for them to walk. As they start striding through the grass and dry leaves Clarke can't help but pay attention to the details, she can't smell Lexa's perfume, she didn't smell her scent even when they hugged but she can hear her boots on the floor.

_"I can see you but no one else can, I can hear you too but Picasso only feels your presence. You're real, to me you feel real, I could touch… I touched you, I felt you hugging me back, I can even hear your boots on the ground and yet you're not her."_

Clarke says brokenly and Lexa looks at her with a curious expression.

_"We've encountered dozens of civilizations, some even more advanced than yours, and yet yours is different."_

_"Why are you here?"_

_"We can take on many forms, many different beings; we can be the subject's greatest mentor, or failure or greatest love. In Cadogan's case we were all of the above, but with you… You lost so much, so many people, you could have been looking at your mother, your father, even Bellamy or Finn and yet you chose Lexa. On an unconscious level, she was the one you picked. Why?"_

The being in Lexa's body asks not answering Clarke's question and the blonde looks at her.

_"I don't know."_

The blonde says and Lexa stops tilting her head to the side, silently studying the blonde, and Clarke feels like her whole essence is vulnerable for Lexa to see, in part it makes sense; the real Lexa always saw Clarke for who she was.

_"There's truth in your answer but there's also something more."_

_"If you know the answer can you just tell me? Because I honestly don't know."_

_"I think you do Clarke. In your core, you do know the answer."_

There is something in the way that this being speaks that sounds immensely like Lexa and as Lexa often did, this being can also irk the blonde.

_"Why are you here? The test is over, my friends came back, there's no reason for you to be here."_

Clarke says and the being smiles, a soft smile that feels as rare as the ones Lexa shared with Clarke. The blonde sighs closing her eyes, it seems such a long time ago.

As the blonde thinks about the question she didn't give an answer to, she opens her eyes to look at Lexa again and the brunette is no longer there. A pang in Clarke’s heart makes her want to cry and the blonde falls to her knees sobbing, the longing she feels for Lexa seems to have increased tenfold. Perhaps it's because seeing her again splits open the wound of their love, a forbidden love between two clashing tribes in a time of war that even after all this time is still present in Clarke's mind and soul. The blonde's longing for what could have happened crashing heavily down on her like a tsunami wave, now that she has the time to think, to mourn.

**

Raven is watching Clarke walking towards the blonde's tent with a frown. Since their conversation a few days ago, the Latina has been paying close attention to her friend. They have been just enjoying the time at the lake, Clarke laughs and seems as carefree as never before but sometimes Raven catches her deep in thought and she can't stop herself from being worried.

_"Doesn't Clarke seem to be acting weird lately?"_

Raven asks and Murphy looks at her with a confused expression and shrugs casually.

_"She has always been weird.”_

The young man says sarcastically and Raven glares at him as Murphy looks at her with a smile.

_“For the first time in our lives we have no battles to fight, no one to save, maybe she's just adjusting to our new reality."_

The man says and Emori nods looking back at Clarke's tent and then at Raven.

_"Murphy is right. She just needs time, we all do."_

Everyone stays silent for a while and then Raven looks at her friends with a smile.

_"We should focus on the future. As much as I'm enjoying this vacation by the lake I think we should find another place to stay, one that can withstand heavy rains and strong winds. Maybe we could go to Arkadia to see if the rover is still there; maybe Emori and I will be able to fix it."_

Raven says and Indra nods as she looks around and Octavia sighs, she’s not particularly fond of the idea of going back to Arkadia, the memories of Lincoln’s execution still very present in her mind but reluctantly she nods.

_"I think you're right, we might find some useful things there. We'll talk to Clarke about it in the morning."_

As they discuss the possibilities of having a vehicle and mechanisms to build a proper home Raven casts another glance at Clarke’s tent. She hopes that having a plan for the future will lighten the blonde's mood after all Clarke was always a person of action, she always took matters into her own hands, she was never one to shy away from tasks and Raven can only hope that with something to do Clarke will feel less lonely. The Latina has a feeling that Clarke despite the large group she is in feels lost and alone sometimes and part of Raven can relate to that feeling all too well.

**

A few days later Clarke finds herself in Arkadia grounds, she can't help but look around as memories of all that she lost come to her mind. The day is coming to an end as the sky turns dark blue and orange and pink hues hover on the horizon as the sun sets down.

_"You are far more complex than I've imagined."_

That voice again, Lexa's voice drifts easily and softly in the breeze and when Clarke turns around she sees her again. It's not Lexa and yet Clarke's heart does somersaults in her chest as if it was Lexa herself in front of her.

_"What do you want?"_

Clarke says grateful that there's no one around, if Murphy saw her talking while alone he would think she was crazy. A part of her thinks she is going insane too, the test is over and her friends have been adjusting to their lives on earth with no threats and yet this being still appears as if this is perpetual torture.

_"This is not purgatory, Clarke."_

The being says as if reading Clarke’s mind, perhaps it does and Clarke can’t tell if that pleases her or angers her.

_"I don't understand what you mean."_

Clarke says a little annoyed by this being's presence, it reminds Clarke a lot of when she first met Lexa and she was Heda teaching Clarke at every turn. The being looks unfazed by Clarke's outburst and looks at her, her keen eyes always studying Clarke as if she was a special artifact.

_"Do you have an answer for me?"_

_"What?"_

Clarke asks dumbfounded and Lexa smiles, it's quite remarkable that some expressions are so Lexa even though it's a higher being. Then again Lexa was always wiser than the rest of the world even considering the grounders' limitations.

_"The last time we spoke I asked you why from all the people we could have impersonated you chose Lexa."_

Clarke stops walking and looks at the woman, her mind in turmoil at the question and the thoughts it brings.

_"I guess she was my mentor, failure, and greatest love, just like you said."_

Clarke answers kicking dirt with her foot and Lexa smiles.

_"You're a curious species."_

_"So you keep saying."_

Clarke says with a huff as she looks around and tries to picture how Arkadia would be if Lexa hadn’t been shot and Pike didn't murder an entire grounder army sent there to protect them.

_"The transcendence of your species has brought us a different kind of knowledge. Madi chose to stay with us but only after she knew you wouldn't be alone. You… Clarke Griffin the first person to ever kill someone during the test. Your friends decided to come back despite that. I… I can't help but wonder why from the dozens of civilizations we have encountered since the dawn of time, yours hold on to love like it's more important than transcendence."_

_"That's what makes us humans."_

_"And yet humankind has a history of violence. Take Lexa as an example, she was ready to wage a war against you when you came to earth."_

_"It was brought on out of fear."_

Clarke replies in an instant as if after all this time she still needs to defend Lexa’s reasons and the being looks at her quizzically.

_"So many complex emotions, even in your limitations you have added some much knowledge to us, and much comes from what you felt and saw."_

Clarke frowns, the reason why this being keeps showing up to her is still a mystery to her, and Clarke's curiosity is growing with each interaction with this version of Lexa.

_"Is that why you are here? Because we are complex?"_

Clarke asks and Lexa smiles, it's a kind smile; a small curl of her lips that Clarke can't help but think holds some kind of honest emotion.

_"Your actions and transcendence disrupted our previous balance."_

Lexa says as they keep walking, Lexa's hands behind her back in the same regal posture that it was so Heda.

_"What does that mean?"_

Clarke asks at the same time Echo's voice echoes through the forest calling out for her and as the blonde looks around trying to see if Echo is close she doesn't see how the being vanishes in an instant, but Clarke doesn’t even need to look at the space where Lexa was just moments ago to know she’s no longer there.

**

_"Here you are! I've been looking for you."_

Echo says with a smile and Clarke is still adjusting to this new version of one of the best spies Azgeda had.

_"Is something wrong?"_

Clarke asks and Echo blushes slightly with a shrug.

_"I wanted to talk to you."_

The woman replies and something about her demeanor catches Clarke off guard.

_"Okay. You're scaring me."_

_"It's nothing important. It's just… just…"_

Echo trails off and Clarke looks at her with a confused expression and Echo sighs as she looks down at her hands and up at Clarke, holding out a dagger for the blonde to take.

_"Where did you find this?"_

Clarke asks, as she picks up the dagger with trembling hands and is in awe of its condition.

_"When we came back I was one of the first ones to arrive. I wasn't familiar with the bunker much but I was familiar with Polis and I wandered around waiting for the others and found it. It's Lexa's dagger isn't it?"_

The Azgeda former spy asks and Clarke feels her eyes tearing up at the sight of the object in her hands. She couldn’t forget the dagger with the wooden handle, the same item was holding when they met and the same weapon she used once to save Clarke.

_"It was."_

The blonde says brokenly as a rush of wind blows past them twirling leaves from the floor.

_"I thought that you should keep it. I have nothing of Bellamy but his memories and I think that if I had something of him I would like to hold onto it too."_

The brunette says earnestly and Clarke looks at her, she never had much time to get to know Echo that weel but now they all are one big family, and Clarke can't help but feel touched by the woman's words.

_"Echo…"_

The blonde trails off and Echo gives her a soft smile placing one hand on Clarke’s shoulder squeezing it slightly, emotion clouding her own eyes but her voice is steady and calm.

_"You did what you had to do. Our Bellamy would understand, even if he was right about the whole transcendence thing, he was mind-wiped, Cadogan got it all wrong and what he did to Madi was proof of that. I hope you find the peace you deserve within you."_

The honesty in the woman’s words is more than the blonde could expect coming from someone with such sharp edges as Echo but Clarke nods at the loss for words. Complex emotions indeed, as Clarke watches Echo go she can’t help but think about Lexa, or the being in her form and their previous short conversations.

**

Two more weeks go by with the group of friends scavenging through Arkadia in search of tools and equipment that Raven and Emori can use in their endeavor. Gaia and Indra have taken on the task of taking care of a place to stay while they are in Arkadia and Jackson and Miller have been going through the old things in search of medical equipment. Levitt and Octavia have been wandering around and the man has been getting glimpses of life on earth. Hope and Jordan have been listening to the stories Murphy tells them about everyone, especially about Harper and Monty while searching for clothes and other useful items.

Echo and Niylah have been hunting; the two sharing a bond sense their honest conversation in the bunker. As for Clarke, well the blonde thought she would find peace with her friends but the higher being keeps appearing to her and their conversations although pleasant are always short-lived and the blonde has this nagging feeling that something isn't quite right even so the blonde pushes through and decides to look for anything that can help her and the others pass their time, she was surprised to find some old books and she’s been carefully looking over them to make a list of what they have.

_"Look what I found!"_

Murphy announces proudly holding a dusty bottle in his hands with a grin.

_"The last time I decided to drink, things didn't quite go that well."_

Niylah says with a smile as Murphy settles around the campfire and starts pouring the amber liquid into the metallic cups of her friends and Echo looks at Niylah with a smile.

_“At least we’re not going to a war hungover.”_

The former Azgeda says and Murphy chuckles.

_"I don't think that's a good idea."_

Indra says as she eyes the liquid in her cup with some suspicion and Octavia smiles at her.

_"Come on Indra, once in a while having something to drink it's not that bad."_

Octavia says as Gaia nods and brings her cup to her lips closing her eyes at the strong flavor that burns her tongue and throat.

_"Wow, that's far stronger than I anticipated. I think you'll enjoy it, mother."_

Gaia says as Clarke watches Indra taking a sip of the alcoholic beverage and making a weird face at the taste.

_"It reminds me of something Kane gave us when we had our peace deal in TonDC."_

The woman says and Clarke watches in awe as the older woman downs the rest of the liquid and asks Murphy for more. The man snorts in laughter but pours more of it into Indra’s cup. Clarke remembers with a smile that her father would have a glass of whiskey from time to time in the Ark. Booze was almost forbidden back then but the council and the chancellor always managed to make exceptions for themselves. Some even managed to hold on to old bottles that their ancestors brought with them from the earth.

**

_"Oh come on Clarke you suck at this."_

Raven says and Clarke huffs and throws the cards she was holding on the table. For the last few hours, the group has been playing card games. Levitt had found them and was all too happy to ear how to play. Indra and Gaia are mostly observing and learning the rules as the others take turns while playing, Clarke has been Raven's partner for the last round and as in the other rounds, she lost again much to Raven’s dismay.

Night has fallen but the group has made as always a huge fire to gather around and enjoy the night. The surrounding area is illuminated by torches and the campfire casts a bright orange light, the night it's cozy and everyone is slightly tipsy, even Indra. Gaia and Clarke however drank considerably less than the others.

_"I think I got the rules of it."_

Indra says and Clarke looks at her surprised but smiles and gets up from the wooden improvised bench.

_"Have my place. I'll go for a walk."_

Clarke says and Niylah stands too.

_"I'll go with you; there might be animals out there in the dark."_

The woman says and Clarke shakes her head looking at a sleepy Echo swaying on the bench where Niylah was sitting with her.

_"I think you should take your roommate to bed."_

Clarke says chuckling slightly when a tipsy Niylah tries to lift Echo and they all but stumble on their way to the shelter they have made in Arkadia for the time being.

As Clarke wanders a few feet away from her friends she can't help but smile. The blonde walks through a patchy slope and sits down looking at the clearing where her friends are. She feels the presence next to her before she sees Lexa walking in her direction with her hands behind her back. At this time Clarke doesn't even care for the reasons why this being keeps showing up. There's always a sense of peace when Lexa appears and although the blonde knows she shouldn't enjoy the woman's presence she can't help but feel better at seeing Lexa even though it's not her.

_"Why aren't you with your friends tonight?"_

Lexa asks when the blonde stands up and looks at her.

_"I was with them until now; I just needed some fresh air."_

The blonde says feeling her head a little dizzy with the alcohol still in her system and Lexa looks at her, there's something different in her eyes, something that Clarke can't quite grasp yet. They silently walk down the slope and when the trees get denser Clarke notices that Lexa has stopped and is silently observing Clarke's friends. Everyone remains oblivious to both of them and Clarke feels a sense of comradery towards the higher being that keeps coming to her.

_"Things are different somehow."_

Lexa says turning her face to look at Clarke, the full moon casting a silver light on her soft features and Clarke puts her hands in the pockets of her coat to stop herself from touching this woman's face.

_"What do you mean?"_

_"Transcendence is a choice as I told you before, you lost that right but your friends… they willingly chose to come back even though there would be consequences. We are somehow curious as to why?"_

_"We?"_

Clarke asks before she can't stop herself and the being smiles, a gentle curl of her lips, intentional, and the blonde can't help but wonder if this higher being is showing real emotion.

_"For millions of years no one ever failed the test by killing another subject only to have their place taken by another candidate but even though this was already new to us we couldn't foresee that the result of the test would be delivered by not one but two different people. Raven and Octavia acted as one even though they didn't realize it at the time or at least Octavia didn’t, Raven however seemed to know exactly what she was doing and her beliefs in the right outcome were astonishing, to say the least. They both succeeded and yet here they are, unable to continue your species and to transcend. They came back for you and you were the one who doomed them in the first place, but neither seems to mind."_

Lexa says looking at Clarke with a sort of lost expression and Clarke shakes her head.

_"They didn't do this just for me."_

_"How so?"_

_"All we ever wanted was to live in peace."_

_"Sharing your consciousness with ours would allow you to live in peace."_

_"You say you live in peace but what you really mean is you exist forever in every time and space in the universe."_

Clarke explains softly as if her words make total sense as an uproar of laughter drifts from the campfire and Clarke smiles looking at her friends from a distance.

_"I would like to understand that."_

Lexa says as she looks ahead to see Raven laughing and congratulating Indra on their win.

_"Let me ask you this: you share a consciousness, you don't feel pain, and you decide who is worth saving and which civilizations should be wiped out, but what do you have to offer? Happiness? Love?"_

Clarke asks with her raspy voice and Lexa looks at her.

_"Knowledge and the infinite, that's what transcending allows you."_

_"But there's no individuality, you just coexist without the basic things that make us… us…"_

Clarke says simply and Lexa tilts her head slightly, for all the knowledge this being in Lexa's body possesses there's still something lacking.

_"We feel, and what you offer is the opposite of it, of what we want."_

_"We offer peace."_

_"Why are you here Lexa?"_

Clarke asks, unable to not say Lexa's name and the being looks at her and sighs.

_"You know I'm not Lexa and yet you hugged me."_

_"I did and you hugged me back."_

There's a shift in the environment, something that Clarke can't explain.

_"I felt compelled to, I felt your pain."_

There's a moment in silence and Clarke regards Lexa with interested and keen eyes, the higher being has indeed said at the test that they could feel everything Clarke did.

_"Why?"_

The blonde asks trying to hold on to whatever is happening between them and the being looks at her and sighs.

_"I felt your pain, in that moment I felt it and it felt the right thing to do."_

_"There's genuine truth in your words."_

Clarke says almost mimicking Lexa’s words from their previous encounter and the being nods slightly.

_"We're always truthful."_

_"I assume so, and yet being truthful and genuine are two different concepts. Being truthful is an inherent quality but being genuine is born out of caring for the other, you’re genuine and you want to show it but you don’t have to be it even if your nature is truthful."_

_"We care for those who are taking the test to transcend."_

Lexa says and Clarke smiles as if she had realized something that this higher being hasn't yet.

_"But you don't care for the civilizations who failed the test before? You don't allow them second chances. You're here now, you want to understand why they chose to come back, feeling is your answer. After all we did, all the suffering and pain, they want to live and feel what we couldn't for so long."_

_"Teach me how to feel then. Make me see what we don't but you do so clearly."_

The being says and Clarke frowns and the woman continues.

_"There's been a shift in our balance, we… You say there's no individuality, and although we coexist in the same consciousness that's not entirely true."_

_"You're here for yourself!"_

Clarke states simply and Lexa bows her head slightly in a nod.

_"It is as you say, we share the same consciousness but we are also individual entities in a way. Since I encountered your species the balance of the universe has changed, I've been forced to question my own nature and reality. Madi’s decision didn't come easy to her, a part of her wanted to be with you."_

_"She wants me to be happy and she knows she brought me more happiness than we both thought possible when we met."_

There's a silence after Clarke's words that hangs heavily around them, the night owls and birds sing from the surrounding forest but it almost feels as if time has stopped.

_"Madi brought a lot of knowledge to us, it almost feels like when she transcended she brought others within her."_

Lexa says and Clarke nods, not entirely sure of what her words mean but files that information for later.

_"Tell me Clarke do you really think that this is better than transcendence?"_

Lexa asks looking curiously at the blonde and Clarke snorts in laughter as Lexa frowns. For some reason Lexa's confused expression just makes Clarke feel more at ease with her. The blonde takes in the being's gentle expression, it's so Lexa, the commander had always had this amazing duality when Heda she was ruthless and her face impassive and intimidating, and even so she would change for Clarke. Her eyes would soften and sparkle even when her war-paint was coloring her face, and Lexa would smile a small gesture just for Clarke. Thinking about it makes Clarke smile at the memories, she didn't have the time to realize all the changes she brought to Lexa's life, and yet she can picture them vividly now, especially when this being is right in front of her using Lexa's body.

_"You may think that we were doomed and it is true we were stuck in a loop of violence but in our hearts, we always wanted to live in peace. To feel the freedom we are now enjoying. Maybe we will die and not transcend but at least we got our peace, our freedom. All the violence wasn't for nothing. It led us here."_

Clarke says taking a step closer to Lexa and the being looks at her intensely. Maybe Clarke is still in daze from the alcohol, or maybe it's the fact that this being, in Lexa's corporeal form, makes her feel things she thought she wouldn't feel anymore.

_"You asked me how to feel, and I'm not sure if I can do it, but you felt my pain, maybe you can feel this too."_

The blonde says with her voice soft and husky and before she can second guess herself she is moving towards Lexa, Clarke cups the being’s cheek in her hand, a weird warm feeling creeping over her from the touch. It's not Lexa and yet she can feel the soft skin under her thumb when she runs it over perfect cheekbones. When Clarke's lips touch plump ones an explosion of colors burst behind her closed eyelids, Clarke smiles and the being moves their lips against her own.

The kiss doesn't last long but it's soft and Clarke feels strange inside. It almost feels like her very first kiss with Lexa when the brunette had caught her by surprise and yet there's a weird sense of familiarity in it that the blonde can’t fight. If it was up to Clarke she would stay there kissing this higher being and relinquishing in her warm touch. But all good things must come to an end and Clarke slowly pecks Lexa on the lips once more and then turns around to walk towards her friends.

Lexa stands there with her lips tingling as she brings her right hand to her lips completely astonished with what just happened.

_"I think I feel it."_


	2. Adjustment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Welcome back!  
> Let me start by telling you how grateful I am for your feedback, your comments and kind words over the first chapter was a really big surprise.  
> As I said before this fic will be short and simple and in this second chapter we will look at Clarke and her friends and how are they adapting to their new reality.  
> Spoiler Alert: there's a new character on this chapter and I can't wait to know how you feel about it.  
> As usual kudos and comments are welcome.  
> Happy readings!!! :)

**Chapter 2 – Adjustment**

Morning comes and with it brings the sound of chirping birds and some excited laughs. Clarke blinks sleepily as she sits up on the improvised mattress, rubbing her eyes, the blonde places her feet on the floor and seeks her boots. As the blonde woman stands up dressing and groaning while she stretches her muscles, her back aches and Clarke sighs, in Sanctum at least she had a better bed.

As Clarke wanders around her makeshift tent she washes her face and thinks about what she did the night before. The image of the kiss comes to her mind as if it was a dream, Clarke can't help but feel something twisting painfully in her chest. She kissed Lexa, but it wasn't her and yet this being that claims to not have feelings had kissed her back. It almost feels like the City of Light again but this time Clarke was kissing someone else, something else and the blonde is not sure of how she should be feeling about it.

As Clarke's mind reels with all that transpired between her and this being she can't help but think if it will have consequences, if perhaps it was some kind of test and another one she failed. The blonde doesn't have much time to dwell on it as another wave of laughter laced with the sound of clapping hands drifts in from the outside of the tent.

_"I fucking did it."_

The blonde hears and her curiosity grows as she steps outside of the tent and sees Octavia grinning proudly at Raven.

_"I always knew you could do it."_

Murphy says holding Emori and kissing her on the cheek as Raven looks around and sees Clarke walking towards them.

Arkadia grounds had suffered from the second nuclear apocalypse but as opposed to what happened to Polis and the decaying tower which had crashed onto the floor on top of the bunker, Arkadia's structures were mostly still intact.

_"Clarke look, Raven was able to fix the rover."_

Gaia says with awe in her voice and Clarke smiles; after all they have been through the last Fleimkepa is still surprised when it comes to the miracles of technology.

_"It's working?"_

Clarke asks in disbelief and Raven nods wiping down her sweaty forehead with the sleeve of her eternal orange bomber jacket.

_"If I didn't know better I would say you're surprised, Clarke."_

The Latina says and Clarke shakes her head slightly smiling at her friend.

"I just thought it would take longer."

"Well to be honest it will, we just know that the battery is working."

Emori says and Raven nods looking at her friends.

"Emori is right, we still have to check the solar panels and make sure we can use them for long periods and fix some other stuff but the battery and the engine are as good as we can get them."

Raven says and Niylah nods as she looks around, the fire from the day before is now only ashes, and even though the sun is high in the sky and they will have the whole day to decide what tasks to do she decides to go for a walk.

_"Well, I'll go to fetch more wood."_

Niylah says and Echo looks at her and smiles.

_"I'll go with you."_

The former Azgeda spy says and Miller looks at Jackson and Murphy.

"So, since we're going to stay here a while longer we should build something more sturdy. If it starts raining we're going to need a safer place than the wooden shelter."

The man says wisely as Clarke nods, she knows Octavia is not entirely comfortable in Arkadia, she doesn’t blame her; she wouldn’t enjoy it either if instead of Arkadia she was staying at the tower in Polis even though she never felt more comfortable than there in Lexa’s luxurious rooms with soft mattresses and fur blankets that caressed her skin. But after what happened there Clarke wouldn’t feel at home there and she knows that it’s exactly how Octavia feels and now that they can, Clarke would rather have everyone happy and comfortable.

As it is the best thing to do is to see if they can use the old rooms of Arkadia, at least they will be protected from the weather and have some privacy and comfort, Jackson had checked med bay and found out that the inside of the structure was pretty much like they left it, obviously, the explosion caused by Illian had left some damage but most of the damage is in a separated sector and the rooms are on another wing so it’s safe to assume that the place will be safe for them all.

**

Echo is a few feet away from Niylah picking up branches and piling them up. Neither of them has shared a word since they woke up together in bed. Obviously, Niylah is no stranger to the pleasures of the flesh but she didn't think she would find comfort in Echo's arms.

Since their shared confessions at the bunker, the two women have been getting closer but they weren't exactly expecting to stumble down onto one of their beds kissing and stripping their clothes off after a night of heavy drinking. Echo is still mourning Bellamy's death and if it wasn't for the alcohol in her system the night before she doubts that she would have got involved with Niylah like that, it feels sudden, and yet she can’t say she regrets it.

_"You should take those to camp; I think I'm going to see if I can hunt something."_

Niylah says and Echo frowns and looks at her.

_"You? Hunting?"_

_"What? I used to live in the woods with my father for years. I know how to track and hunt."_

Niylah says as she starts to walk away and Echo has a feeling that the blonde doesn't want to talk to her about what happened. Regardless of everything that has been happening Echo is more than used to the fast pace of life on earth or anywhere else, it has been like that forever even if her time in space had a different and slower pace.

_"Hey hold up."_

Echo says running over to Niylah and placing one hand on the woman's shoulder and making her stop in her tracks. Echo was never one to not face any subject head-on and she won't start now.

_"Don't you think we should talk about what happened?"_

Echo asks, looking carefully at Niylah as the woman sighs and shrugs.

_"We don't have to. I mean after all that we have been through, we got closer and yesterday we had too much to drink. I swear I won't be drinking anything but water and tea in the future."_

Niylah says with a gentle smile and Echo chuckles and shakes her head.

_"You said that the last time too."_

_"Well, at least this time we were not facing extinction while having a hangover."_

They both laugh at Niylah's easy joke and Echo then looks at her.

_"Look, I know that all of this... Transcending and coming back it's a lot to take in…"_

Echo says trailing off and Niylah looks at her with a gentle expression.

_"We're adjusting and having the fun we hadn't had in years and you're still mourning Bellamy's death, we don't have to make it more than it was."_

Niylah says understandingly and Echo shrugs as she turns away but then stops and looks at Niylah with a smirk.

_"For the record, we have the rest of our lives now, and we're all stuck together so might as well have some fun and I did have fun yesterday, at least for what I can remember I think I did."_

With that Echo starts to carry the wood away as Niylah looks baffled at her. The woman shakes her head as she thinks back to her previous night, Niylah has always been aware of her attraction to other women, Clarke wasn't the only one who shared her bed with Niylah, and Niylah isn't sure what they were thinking when they came back knowing that they would be the only ones on a deserted planet. They weren't thinking about sex, that's for sure, or at least not all of them, but spending their lives having the possibility of sharing a bed with someone else is indeed a pleasant idea.

**

As more weeks pass by in Arkadia the group had no other choice but to make it home and when the heavy rains started to fall during long nights everyone thanked Miller for his insight about it. Although some felt more comfortable than others they had no other choice but to restore what parts of Arkadia’s rooms needed to be repaired, and they fixed an old part of the old structure that for now is their headquarters.

It is morning when Raven looks at a project that she has been working on for the last few days and smiles. When she was still living in Arkadia after Clarke had left she had a small project with Sinclair and now she can finally work on it as much as she wants to. Raven smiles as she looks at her new baby, it's a motorcycle that much like the rover works with solar energy and although doesn’t seem too reliable, at least it is now working. The woman wants to try it and looking around she decides that since everyone is still sleeping she will go for a ride by herself.

The woman has been working in Arkadia’s grounds for too long and she wants to enjoy the nature. As she adjusts herself onto the vehicle Raven makes sure that her brace won't get stuck on the motorcycle's body and starts the engine. She knows that she won't be able to drive far because the battery won't last long and even though it's sunny the motorcycle doesn't have big solar panels to recharge constantly as it has only a small panel at the front.

As Raven drives away from the camp she smiles, the wind caresses her hair as the sun kisses her face, and the woman for the first time since she touched the ground feels free. It's an indescribable feeling to be on earth and not worry about grounders, wars, acid fog, or another nuclear apocalypse. The motorcycle allows Raven to drive through slopes and patchy trails and sometime later she reaches the sides of the river. Arkadia's people used to go there to fetch clean water and Raven decides to stop to freshen up a little before going back.

After parking the motorcycle in the clearing Raven slides the zipper of her bomber jacket down and strips it off placing it on a rock as she grabs a water bottle and descends towards the river. After washing her face and refilling her water bottle she walks towards the motorcycle and looks at the sky. Her friends are probably waking up by now but Raven wants to prolong her moment just a while longer after all she deserves as much. Her life since she left the Ark was always a rush of emotions, a roller coaster of losses and wars, and lately, it even included jumps from planet to planet as time and space got entangled in a mess of more wars and mysteries to solve.

Basking in the morning light, Raven closes her eyes, inhaling deeply, the scent of pine-trees and wildflowers invades her nostrils and she knows without a doubt that returning to the planet earth was the best decision she could have taken. Taking in her surroundings when she opens her eyes, Raven briefly ponders the idea of diving into the river, but it’s not warm enough for it and she is comfortable sitting on the ground. Taking a deep breath Raven smiles and closes her eyes again willing herself to enjoy a few more minutes in silence.

The sound of snapping branches catches her ears and Raven tenses slightly but then sighs. There are no enemies in this new life, only animals in the forest and Raven shakes her head, sometimes it’s still too strange to believe that there are no worries now apart from the daily tasks everyone has. There’s a rustling sound coming from somewhere, it’s getting closer and Raven opens her eyes slightly startled by the proximity of the noise.

As Raven looks ahead she sees a rabbit stopping and looking around but before she can even make a small movement an arrow flies through the air with a whoosh and the rabbit falls dead on the ground. Raven's eyes open wider than before as she tries to stand and realizes that she is not carrying any weapons with her, there was no need for them anyways or so she thought.

As Raven’s mind tries to process what just happened she looks to her right side and gasps as she watches as a woman lands elegantly on the floor jumping from a tree much like a cat. Raven’s body goes rigid when the woman turns around and stands looking weirdly at her.

_"Who… Who are you?"_

Raven asks as the woman looks from her to the dead rabbit and Raven again as if thinking of what to do. Raven is struck by the elegance in which the woman moves, wearing black clothes and a bow clipped to her back. Her hair is dark and long and her eyes a light brown color that almost appear to be amber in the sunlight. The woman stays silent as she walks towards the rabbit and murmurs something.

"Yu gonplei ste odon."

Raven can hear the words from the small distance between them, she would think the woman couldn't speak judging by the way she ignored Raven’s question but that's not the case.

_"Do you… hmm, do you speak English?"_

Raven asks when she catches the woman's eyes on her again, a small smile playing on the woman's lips almost as if she is too shy to address Raven and the Latina although feeling slightly silly for her unanswered question takes upon herself to break the ice.

_"My name is Raven, Raven Reyes."_

_"That's a weird name for someone who can't fly."_

The woman simply says walking towards Raven and eyeing the motorcycle with slight suspicion.

_"Well, I was born in space so I think it's fitting."_

Raven says scratching the back of her neck and the woman offers her an amused look.

_"You were Skaikru."_

The mysterious woman states bluntly and Raven nods, being a part of a tribe seems so far away now that she feels like it was a lifetime ago.

_"Are you a grounder?"_

Raven asks slightly taken aback by her insecurity, she doesn't know how to approach this woman, she has no idea of who she is but is more than that, the truth is that Raven didn’t think she would encounter anyone else from the human species. But as it is there's a quite beautiful woman standing in front of her, using the old language from the grounders, which makes Raven think she is someone from one of the twelve clans. Granted it could have been someone from the Ark too, they were one hundred of them when they first came to earth, not to mention Bellamy, then Raven, and then everyone else. Some of them like Octavia and Clarke had learned the language well enough and even used it when they didn’t want the others to know what they were saying.

_"Grounder, wonkru, trikru it's all just so vague now."_

The woman says with a smile, her skin complexion is remarkably pale for someone who lived under the sun so long and Raven finds herself intrigued by this mysterious woman who eyes her with interest.

_"You decided to come back from transcendence."_

Raven finds herself saying and it's not a question but the woman shrugs casually.

_"This is all I know!"_

The woman gestures vaguely and Raven frowns as she catches the woman's eyes on her motorcycle again.

_"I can take you for a ride if you want to. There are others who came back too."_

Raven finds herself saying and after all she went through maybe she should be more careful, the woman although elegant seems strong enough to break her in two if she wants to, there is no reason for Raven to be perceived as a threat and the woman looks at her with curious eyes.

_"Atlantis."_

The dark-haired stranger says and Raven frowns as she looks at the woman who is now blushing slightly under the warm sun and Raven's gaze.

_"You told me your name."_

The woman states simply at Raven’s quizzical expression and Raven smiles.

_"Your name is Atlantis?"_

Raven asks surprised and the woman nods, ducking her head down to hide the blush and kicks some dirt with her feet.

_"That's a cool name."_

Raven says as she remembers stories about the lost continent that had sunk into the large ocean, myths, or just bedtime stories, she doesn't know anymore considering everything she had witnessed but the bashful look on the woman's face warms Raven's heart and she picks up her bomber jacket.

_"So do you… Uh… Do you want to join us?"_

Raven asks as Atlantis looks at her and shrugs.

_"I guess that is just as a good idea as any other I could have today."_

The woman says simply and Raven chuckles, this woman is weird but as Raven climbs on the motorcycle telling Atlantis to hold onto her and the woman snakes her arms, strong ones Raven can tell, around her waist she thinks that maybe a weird new addition to their crew is not a bad idea after all.

**

The morning is passing by slowly, despite the rain the night before the day is sunny and warm even though once in a while the wind blows bringing a chill with it but everyone is out and about. Clarke is dutifully going through some old books and papers mostly, the woman although curious to know what books Arkadia has to offer can’t stop herself from reading old reports from the times in the Ark. The woman is fully immersed in a diary she found when Octavia walks up to her and looks from the table to Clarke with a frown.

_"Hey, have you seen Raven?"_

The petite brunette asks and Clarke looks up at her with a shake of her head.

_"No, I thought she was with you guys. I haven't seen her all morning."_

_"Well Echo and Miller just came back from their hunt for food and they haven't seen her either. Do you think we should be worried?"_

Octavia says as Clarke looks at her, worrying comes to them as second nature after all they have been through. The blonde immediately stands from the chair she was using and it's about to leave the sort of covered office they assembled outside the rooms’ wing when Emori walks in with an empty box to store books and looks at them.

_"I'm sure Raven is fine if I had to guess I would say that she restored one of those old motorcycles and decided to try it."_

Emori says placing the box on the floor and looking at the books the blonde has already put aside for them as Clarke and Octavia look at her and Clarke raises one eyebrow at her.

_"Does she even know how to drive a motorcycle?"_

_"If there's someone who can, that's Raven for sure."_

Murphy says joining them and bringing a pile of books with him and placing them on the table for Clarke to go through.

_"Yeah, well Diyoza and I had one too in Sanctum for a while and it wasn't that bad."_

Octavia says as a pregnant silence falls upon them, there's a lot of their separate time in Sanctum that they haven't shared yet but before any of them can say anything else the sound of a motorcycle reaches them even before the motorcycle itself.

All eyes turn to the vehicle as Raven rides through what once was the gates that divided Arkadia from the rest of the coalition's lands. As soon as the Latina parks her motorcycle Atlantis starts to climb off it blushing profusely, the ride wasn't particularly fast but she was more scared than she would like to admit and all but pressed her body to Raven's warm one and the Latina although taken aback by the sudden proximity didn't say anything and let herself enjoy the touch.

Clarke watches as a woman climbs off the motorcycle and offers a trembling hand for Raven to take. Atlantis having noticed the brace on Raven's leg assumed the woman needed some help. Slightly touched by the caring gesture Raven accepts Atlantis’s help and Clarke can't help but open her mouth in awe.

Picasso chooses this moment to come barking and wagging her tail circling Atlantis happily and the woman looks at the dog with some apprehension. Raven chuckles at the dog’s friendly demeanor and calls the animal to her scratching her ears.

_"She's harmless, her name is Picasso."_

Raven says as Atlantis looks at her and kneels feeling the soft fur in her fingers; she laughs when Picasso jumps at her and tries to lick her face and Raven finds the woman endearing.

_"Guys! Come here, we have a new guest."_

Raven says with a grin and Indra and Gaia walk up to them, the older woman looking quizzically at Atlantis as Jackson and Miller smile at her.

_"Guys this is Atlantis."_

Raven says and the woman nods a bit shyly as Clarke takes a step forward and starts introductions. Gaia pulls Octavia and Indra to the side after noticing the fearful look the woman cast in their direction.

_"Do any of you know who she is?"_

Gaia asks as Octavia shakes her head and Indra looks back at Atlantis, the woman is still talking with Raven and Clarke.

_"We had many of our people in the bunker; I have to admit I didn't know all of them."_

Indra says and Octavia nods as she sighs and looks at Gaia's careful expression.

_"Indra is right, between the bunker, the cryosleep, and Sanctum there were too many of us to know everyone by their names. However she doesn't seem like a threat and Raven must have spoken to her before bringing her here."_

At Octavia's words, Gaia sighs and Echo looks at them from a few feet away and Indra nods to indicate that the woman is now one of them. Although cautiously Echo nods back at them and she decides to keep an eye on the woman just as a precaution.

**

As more weeks go by the weather starts to change and everyone is now considering if they should stay at Arkadia or leave to settle in some other place. The group is still trying to adjust to their new peaceful reality and although they are happy they seem to be also careful especially when it comes to Atlantis. The woman is still rather silent and mysterious but warm and thoughtful, she seems to be always ready to help Raven in whatever she needs, either carrying weights for her or just be around when Raven starts talking, it seems like it’s nonsense jargon for everyone else, usually, she’s just excited about what she is doing and even though Atlantis can’t understand it she enjoys the woman’s company. Raven doesn't seem to mind one bit either though, in fact, she seems to enjoy the calming company of the silent woman who also manages to have simple short retorts to give Murphy whenever he tries to tease her or Raven.

Clarke can't help but be charmed too; Atlantis although silent is always around to help Clarke, almost as if she had made her personal goal to be as useful as she could for both Clarke and Raven. The blonde can't place a finger on it but Atlantis reminds her of something or rather someone.

As the night falls and everyone settles on playing some games Clarke excuses herself and goes for a walk. The blonde knows it's stupid but she can't stop but feeling a little disappointed by the fact that Lexa or the higher being using her body hasn't appeared lately. Not once since the kiss and Clarke wonders not for the first time if that night was another test she failed. The kiss felt real, the being's lips were warm on her own and Clarke realizes with a sigh that she misses that connection with someone.

As Clarke wanders through the forest she hears the night animals around her but she's so consumed in her thoughts that she doesn't pay attention to her surroundings. She stops in her tracks when she hears noises coming from a few feet away and looks around. The knowledge that she might be lost in the forest startles her, she navigated through the forest before, when she left Arkadia and lived alone for more or less three months but that was a long time ago and now as Clarke looks around she realizes that all of her surroundings look exactly the same. An unsettling feeling crashes heavily down on her as she hears more noises coming from the bushes a few feet away.

A soft whisper calling her name calls Clarke's attention and she looks over her shoulder to see Atlantis behind her walking slowly towards her and drawing her bow and an arrow from her back looking around with observing eyes.

_"You shouldn't be so far from camp this late at night."_

The woman says softly and Clarke rolls her eyes at her.

_"Doesn't that work for you too? Besides, it seems I'm not alone anymore."_

Clarke says and Atlantis smiles, it's almost an amused curl of her lips as she shrugs looking softly at Clarke.

_"That might be so, but I lived here for most of my life, I know where the wild animals go hunt at night, their territories, and how to avoid them.”_

_“So were you Trikru?”_

Clarke asks before she can’t stop herself, she can’t help but be curious about the woman not only because Arkadia was fairly close to the lands that once belonged to Lexa’s tribe but also because the grounder has never mentioned to which Clan she belonged to. Atlantis looks at her and shrugs casually.

_“You may say that yeah. Let's go back, it's this way."_

The woman says and Clarke can't help but look dubiously at her.

_"How can you be so sure?"_

Clarke asks and Atlantis smiles kindly at her, almost as if the answer was obvious.

_"I told you, Clarke, this…"_

Atlantis says gesturing around with her left arm and a soft smile.

_"It's my home. It's all I ever known and where I belong."_

Atlantis says as she starts walking and Clarke falls into step with her. There’s something soothing about the woman’s presence, Clarke had felt it right away as soon as she had the chance to spend time with her. There’s also a charming innocence in the way Atlantis speaks and acts. She's always caring when hunting, almost sorrowful for taking a life to keep her own but what strikes Clarke the most it’s the simplicity in which Atlantis seems to see life. She doesn’t talk about her past or how she’s coping with all that happened since the second apocalypse, she just adjusts and adapts but keeps her heart light and hopeful even though sometimes someone mentions something from the past and Clarke sees a cloud of sadness in the woman’s gaze.

Clarke can’t help but feel drawn to her in a way, Atlantis doesn’t judge her, doesn’t seem affected by her harsh words either, and although life is peaceful now, sometimes Clarke’s mood changes and she tries to cast her friends away, usually, they give her the space she needs but Atlantis always keeps an eye on her and is close by, close enough to sometimes just sit down by Clarke’s side in silence just to show her that she’s not alone, she will never be alone, even if Atlantis seemed perfectly content by living the rest of her life alone it almost feels like she knows that for Clarke is the opposite.

_"Is that why you came back even though you could live most of your life alone?"_

Clarke asks as curiosity gets the best of her and Atlantis looks at her with a soft and sad expression but remains silent. They walk side by side in silence for a while until eventually the woman exhales a tired sigh.

_"I'm not alone; I have all the nature and its animals and my ancestors’ memories."_

The woman replies simply and Clarke can't help but shake her head, there's a part of Atlantis that is pure, even after all that happened across the universe, after the bunker, Sanctum and Bardo the woman holds a sort of innocence that Clarke feels tempted to envy. Atlantis is caring and gentle and even though she had noticed the way the woman looks warily at Octavia and Indra she's always pleasant and even polite.

_"I don't think I would like to grow old alone."_

Clarke says in a whisper and Atlantis smiles kindly at her with a nod that it is oddly familiar to Clarke. As they walk side by side Clarke can't help but think about how she would feel at peace with Lexa when they were silently walking through Polis or the tower, strangely enough, even though she doesn't know Atlantis that well the silence is not uncomfortable either, in fact, it reminds Clarke of a long-forgotten sense of comradery and peace.

_"You're not alone Clarke, I once promised I would protect you and even if a lot has changed since then I'm still committed to fulfilling my word."_

The woman states simply after a while as if it is just an afterthought and Clarke frowns at her.

_"What does that mean?"_

Clarke asks a bit sharper than intended and Atlantis looks at her with surprise, a shadow of something that Clarke can't name flashes through her eyes as Atlantis puts her hands in her pockets and shrugs.

_"Maybe that's a story for another time. We're here."_

The woman says softly and Clarke feels the need to apologize for the way in which she voiced her question, she didn’t mean to sound so severe and she knows that even though Atlantis didn’t comment on it she noticed it and the blonde realizes that the look in Atlantis’ gaze was a hurt one.

_"Where the hell were you two?"_

Raven asks before Clarke can say a word and the blonde looks at her friend limping towards them with a frown.

_"We just went for a walk. Now if you excuse me I'm going to bed, I promised Echo and Miller that I would take them to a good hunting spot tomorrow morning."_

Atlantis says as she looks from Raven to Clarke and nods, the blonde woman can't do much more than nod back at her.

_"Thank you for keeping me company."_

Clarke says earnestly hoping that Atlantis will notice the apology in her tone of voice and the woman smiles and walks away.

_"What was that about? Did you say something to her? She seemed off."_

Raven asks, crossing her arms over her chest and Clarke sighs, she didn't mean to pose her question as hard as she did. Atlantis has been nothing but caring with everyone even if some of Clarke's friends are still suspicious about her.

_"No, we just talked."_

_"Are you sure you didn't interrogate her? You know she's closed off."_

Raven says and Clarke can't help but notice the slight protective tone the Latina is using, she shakes her head and smiles.

_"You seem very charmed by our newest addition. Is there something you want to tell me, Raven?"_

_"What? What are you talking about?"_

_"I'm saying that you just came off as if you were jealous that we were together…"_

The blonde says trailing off with a smile, the easy way in which they can now live their lives filling Clarke's heart with newfound happiness.

_"Well she was all weird and now you're avoiding my questions. Were you guys making out in the woods or something?"_

Raven asks teasingly but with genuine curiosity and Clarke snorts and rolls her eyes.

_"Your crush for her is showing Raven."_

_"What? Get out of here!"_

The Latina says and then they both burst into laughter at the ridiculousness of their conversation. Raven looks at Clarke and places one hand on her shoulder squeezing it slightly.

_"This one must go down on history as the silliest conversion I ever had."_

_"Well we have all the time in the world to have these conversations now. There's no one after us, no wars to stop."_

Clarke says and Raven nods as she looks around at their friends still around the fire.

_"Yeah, but I'm still worried."_

_"About what?"_

Clarke asks as she looks at Raven's serious face and the Latina sighs.

_"Echo and Miller, I don't know if it's a good idea to let them go hunt with Atlantis. I mean I can see she's closed off, there's no way of knowing who she was before all this, Octavia and Indra don't remember her either."_

_"Hey, don't worry, they'll be fine, anyone can see that Atlantis has a good heart, they will warm up to her."_

Clarke says as a lightning bolt rips the sky in two and a clap of thunder follows it. Raven nods not entirely convinced yet as the rain starts falling heavily from the sky forcing the group of people to go to their rooms. As Clarke waves goodnight to Raven she can’t stop herself from pondering over the brunette’s concerns. It’s not like she’s worried about Atlantis doing something to Echo or Miller, in fact she’s more worried about what the two of them might say to the other woman in order to know who she was before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you guys think?   
> Who is Atlantis and why is she so mysterious?  
> Stay tuned for more and I'll see you on the next chapter!


	3. The dangers of the wild

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> Welcome back to another chapter!   
> I have to say that I'm deeply surprised and thankful for your reactions to this short story! It has been with a pleased smile that I've been reading your comments.  
> Please keep them coming and your kudos too.  
> About this chapter I have to say I'm not completely sure about it, when I first wrote it I was rather pleased with it but then I changed some things because it didn't seem enough and now I'm still unsure about the vibe and the quality of it so I will let you guys be the judges of that.

**Chapter 3 – The dangers of the wild**

Echo and Miller walk slowly as Atlantis takes the lead; they have been walking since dawn, hunting has become an essential task in the group’s routine and they wanted to make the best of their hunting trip just in case it starts to rain suddenly and they get stuck in Arkadia. With the weather changing rain can last for days, and if that happens the group won’t be able to go out and get the food they need. Atlantis had said that when she was on earth before everything happened they could be forced to not go on hunts for days, and Echo although still cautious about the woman had agreed with leaving early in the morning because the former spy still remembers how the heavy rains and snows would last for days in Azgeda.

_"Are you sure this is a good idea?"_

Miller whispers for only Echo to hear as he eyes Atlantis who seems to be tracking some animal a few feet away from them.

_"I don't think she's a threat to us, but we know close to nothing about her. I mean don't you think we should know more about her? We all have known each other for a long time, we're family but Atlantis? She hasn't shared much about her since she joined us; I just think it’s strange."_

Echo says in a low voice clearly not wanting the woman to hear her and the man frowns and looks at Atlantis with a sigh.

_"Even so, what if she did something bad? I mean we all did things we regret. What if she feels cornered? I don’t want to engage in a fight with her."_

Miller says with a serious expression and Echo looks from Atlantis to Miller and shakes her head.

_"We won't get to that."_

The former spy says as she draws the dagger from her waist at the same time Atlantis stops and looks from the floor to the sky.

_"Something isn't right!"_

The woman exclaims and Echo and Miller both look up to see a group of birds flying off from the trees somewhere ahead of them and the movement from the birds is followed by a loud roaring sound.

_"What the hell was that?"_

Echo asks as she stands beside Atlantis with her dagger in hand and Miller adjusts his pistol.

_"That is a bear, and it's close, closer than it should."_

Atlantis says with such certainty that makes Miller shiver in fear.

_"We should go back."_

_"I agree."_

Echo declares at Atlantis's words and as they turn around a loud scream comes from the same direction of the roaring bear.

_"Someone's there."_

Miller says as another scream is heard and Miller unlocks his gun but Atlantis places one hand on his forearm and the man looks quizzically at her.

_"No, don't, if you fire that gun you will enrage the beast more."_

Atlantis says as a cry for help follows her words and she frowns.

_"Who the hell is there?"_

Miller asks as Atlantis picks up an arrow, the tip of it has a sort of green moisture covering it, she looks over her shoulder as she starts sprinting in the direction of the sounds.

_"That's Raven."_

The woman all but shouts as she runs and Miller and Echo share a scared worried look but follow her, maybe they should make a plan but Atlantis is fast and Raven’s voice echoes again loudly through the forest in panic.

**

Clarke and Murphy are going through some books and making notes when Octavia walks up to them and frowns.

_"Where's Raven?"_

The younger Blake asks and Clarke looks at her shaking her head as if to say she has no idea.

_"I thought she was with Emori."_

_"No, she hasn't seen her all morning and I checked her room, she isn't there either."_

Octavia says and Clarke stands as she rubs her eyes with her palms and groans.

_"That asshole, I bet she tried to go after Echo and the others."_

Clarke says as she starts pacing around and Murphy looks quizzically at her.

_"Hey, hold up Clarke. What's the problem with that?"_

_"Raven thinks Echo and Miller are planning something against Atlantis, she told me herself yesterday that she was worried about it."_

Clarke says and Murphy looks between her and Octavia with a careful expression.

_"I'm sure they won't do anything to her, she's not a threat to us; maybe they just want to know who she is. I mean, can we really blame them for that? This girl shows up from nowhere and no one knows her."_

Murphy says as Clarke looks at him and Octavia and sighs, the blonde groans but puts on her jacket as she starts walking and urges Octavia and Murphy to follow her.

_"Alright let's check with the others to ask if they have seen Raven, but I'm telling you that Raven trusts her, and I trust her too. We're all a family now, and that means Atlantis is part of it too, if she is keeping her past for herself she has to have her reasons for it."_

Clarke says in that tone that is so Clarke Griffin and they decide to check with Jackson and Levitt first if they saw or know where Raven might be. Hope and Jordan easily notice that something isn’t right and join them in the search for the Latina.

_“Are you sure she didn’t go for a ride on the motorcycle, I mean it’s a nice morning to go for a ride.”_

Jordan, always the optimistic one of the group says and Octavia shakes her head slightly pointing in the direction of the mechanic shop.

_“The motorcycle is in there and Clarke is convinced that she went after the others.”_

_“I’m sure of it, Raven might be a genius but she’s not that good at tracking, and trust me I lived in these woods long enough to know that it’s really easy to get lost and we don’t even know where they went.”_

Clarke says as Jordan looks from her to the people around and points in Niylah’s direction.

_“Maybe Niylah knows. Aren’t she and Echo a thing or something?”_

The young man asks and Octavia looks at him with a weird expression, granted that she noticed that the two women have grown closer but she never saw anything that could indicate that they were more than friends. Before she has time to think about it though, Clarke is nodding and striding towards Niylah’s direction.

**

Echo stops in her tracks when she sees Raven crawling on the floor in a clearing as a large white bear approaches her dangerously from the forest.

_"Echo, Miller when I give you the signal, run to Raven and pull her back."_

Atlantis says in a whisper as she looks from them to her surroundings, there's a tree with enough branches for her to climb that will allow her to have a clear shot. Miller nods numbly as he watches horrified as Raven screams again, which only attracts the attention of the wild animal, and the bear roars again in rage.

_"Now."_

Atlantis shouts from the top of the tree as she aims her bow and watches from the corner of her eye as Echo and Miller sprint towards Raven and pull her up and the bear stops and roars again. Raven can't do much more than let herself be dragged back as an arrow pierces the air with a whooshing sound and flies towards the bear's fur, ripping the animal's skin and lodging in the animal's neck.

The bear then turns around wailing in pain and Raven watches it move towards the tree. The Latina it’s still shaken and hears Miller gasp from behind her.

_"Fuck. It's going for Atlantis!"_

Miller says as Raven looks up to see Atlantis pulling another arrow out and aiming at the bear's head. Before she has the chance to fire it the bear grabs the tree and shakes it violently, the woman loses her balance firing the arrow randomly and hitting the bear's shoulder. The woman falls barely able to protect herself and lands on the floor as the bear takes two slow steps in her direction and she barely has the chance to roll on her back to crawl backwards. The bear screams again and losing the balance falls almost on top of her.

_"Aaargh."_

Atlantis screams in pain when the sharp claws of the animal pierce through the skin of her sides and abdomen. The woman manages to pull the dagger from her waist to attack the beast but as she suspected the poison on the arrow was enough to make the animal collapse.

_"Is he dead?"_

Echo asks as they all but run towards Atlantis and she shakes her head, as she pries herself from the beast's grasp with a cry of pain. Echo although still scared move the bear’s arm to help the other grounder break free.

_"I suspect it's a she, and no, I just poisoned her. We should go back before she wakes up."_

Atlantis says gasping and moaning in pain as she eyes the white bear and looks around. Raven seems to be slightly recovering from the shock of what happened and as soon as she sees Atlantis’s ripped clothes she walks up to the young woman and helps her stand.

_"You're bleeding. We should get you to Jackson as soon as possible."_

Raven says as Atlantis nods but moves towards the sleeping bear and pulls the arrows from the beast's flesh.

_"What are you doing?"_

Miller all but hisses at her as Atlantis murmurs something that sounds like an apology.

_"There must be a reason for her to act like this, my best guess is that she's a mama bear, she was probably protecting her territory for hibernation."_

Atlantis says weakly as she stumbles and Raven holds her up, the Latina places one of Atlantis's arms around her own shoulders mindful of the woman's injury and they slowly start to walk away from the sleeping bear.

_"Do you want to share with us how you know so much?"_

Echo asks pointedly and Raven glares at her when the former spy comes closer to help her carrying Atlantis, if the woman's tone is harsher than normal Atlantis doesn't seem to notice. Instead, the woman smiles weakly and sighs.

_"Maybe another time, I would like to stop for a while and rest, maybe sleep for a little."_

The woman says as Echo and Miller share a worried look and Raven squeezes Atlantis' hand.

_"Hey, you can rest once we get to Arkadia; now we need you to lead the way back."_

Raven says trying to keep her voice steady to not show the worry that's taking over her and Atlantis looks at her with a nod.

_"Okay Raven from the Sky people, I'll get us there but then I think I might join my family."_

The woman says feebly, the simplicity of her words catching Echo off guard and she looks at Raven with a sorrowful expression. The fall and the wounds are making Atlantis weak but they start to hurry back to safety as quickly as they can and almost dragging Atlantis as she points out the directions to take, Echo would easily be able to find the way back too, but she remains silent to keep Atlantis talking and awake.

_“What were you even doing here?”_

Miller asks as he looks over his shoulder as if to make sure no other animal is following them and Raven looks from Atlantis’s pale and sweaty face to the man behind her.

_“Nothing. I was just wandering around.”_

The Latina says not very convincingly and Miller sighs, he has an idea as to why Raven was tracking them.

**

_"Should we be worried that they haven't returned yet?"_

Levitt asks as he joins Clarke and Octavia at the clearing in Arkadia's old entrance. The group has been standing there just looking around for any signs of Raven or the others with no avail. As Clarke stands there she can’t help but wonder what did her mother, Kane, and Raven felt that night so long ago when she strolled out of Arkadia grounds to save Finn only to be the one killing him mercifully. The blonde has been standing there for half an hour but it seems a lot longer and she assumes that they felt the same uneasiness she’s feeling now.

The space is very different now, the forest has reclaimed its territory but the high point still gives the group some leverage to survey the surrounding forest. At Levitt’s question, Clarke looks at him and sighs.

_"I don't know, I mean there's no one else here."_

The blonde says and Murphy looks at her and shakes his head.

_"That's what we thought and out of the blue this girl shows up and now three of our people are missing."_

The man says with exasperation dripping in his voice and Octavia looks at him and sighs.

_"You can't seriously be thinking she came back after us."_

The petite brunette says and a heavy silence falls upon them at the implications of Murphy's words. The morning is almost coming to an end and there are no signs of Raven and the others. Worrying is in their nature as it is looking out for each other. That's the reason why they came back, they wanted to finally live a peaceful life with Clarke, looking out and caring for each other without the heavy weight of fighting wars and trading peace deals.

_"There's no way we can go out there on foot and on our own, we don't even know where they went."_

Clarke says and Levitt looks at her with a pensive expression.

_"Do you think Emori can get the rover running? We could cover more ground with it."_

The man speaks softly and Clarke thinks about his idea for a couple of seconds closing her eyes to take a deep breath.

_"Guys, we need your help! Murphy, get Jackson!"_

Raven's voice echoes from a few feet away as all eyes turn to her with clear concern and Clarke gasps as she sees Echo and Miller carrying an almost passed out Atlantis between them and Raven walks fast a short way ahead of them with fear etched in her brown eyes.

_"What happened?"_

Clarke asks as she runs towards her friends and notices the dark black blood soaking the woman's clothes.

_"It's all my fault, Clarke. You have to save her."_

Raven says frantically and Clarke looks from her to Octavia as the younger Blake takes Echo's place noticing how exhausted the woman looks.

_"Let's take her to the med bay; the structure is stable enough for us to attend to her wounds."_

Clarke says as Raven places herself on the other side of the woman and Echo and Miller watch them go.

_"She is a Nightblood."_

Echo says looking down at her hands as she takes notice of the color of the blood as Niylah and Gaia approach them having heard from Murphy what happened.

_"Well, that might explain why she's so closed off."_

Niylah says as Miller looks at her puzzled by the woman's words and Gaia nods.

_"Didn't Queen Nia have her own Nightblood too? I mean we know now about Ontari but it could have been more Nightbloods that we weren't aware of at the time. However, it doesn't matter now either way."_

Gaia says as everyone nods and Miller and Echo decide to wash and change while they wait for news about Atlantis' condition. Even though it’s early and there are tasks to be done the group feels a heavy sense of worry clouding their minds after seeing Atlantis being dragged to the med bay by Clarke, Octavia and Raven.

**

Jackson walks inside the med bay as Clarke is already taking Atlantis' jacket and ripping her shirt off to see the damage.

_"What happened?"_

The doctor asks while Octavia walks out shaking her head, she was trying to make Raven go with her but the Latina remains glued to her spot and looks at him.

_"A bear… A fucking bear happened and it's all my fault."_

The woman says as Jackson walks up to Atlantis and quickly sets to work with Clarke's help.

_"She's losing too much blood."_

Clarke says and Jackson nods as he looks around for what he needs to clean the wounds, the cuts are deep but as far as he can see there are no organs damaged.

_"I can clean and suture the wounds, but she will need a blood transfusion."_

_"Take mine!"_

Raven all but shouts still shaken up by what happened and Murphy looks from the dark blood to Raven and shakes his head.

_"She's a Nightblood; I'll give my blood instead."_

The man says and Clarke looks at him, Murphy has come a long way and has become a hero but she shakes her head and strips off of her jacket rolling up her sleeves as Jackson is starting to work on the woman’s wounds and suturing Atlantis' cuts.

_"My blood is dark too, take mine instead."_

_"Are you sure Clarke? I'm not new to this and I don't mind."_

The man says and Clarke smiles kindly at him, Atlantis and Murphy have surprisingly formed a bond of sorts despite the man’s previous words, the woman immediately catching onto the fact that Murphy's sarcasm was born of a deflective and defense mechanism.

_"I'm sure. Take Raven with you and make sure she eats something and then let the others know we have everything under control."_

Clarke says but Raven shakes her head as she looks up at Atlantis's pale face.

_"I'm staying."_

Raven says not leaving any margin for debate and Murphy looks from her to Clarke and the blonde nods at him as Murphy sighs and places one hand on Raven’s shoulder to give a gentle comforting squeeze before walking out. As soon as the door closes Raven looks around as if to know how she can help.

_"Raven, pass that chair to Clarke."_

Jackson says gently, the man is more than familiar with Raven’s reasoning; it happened the same when Emori was all but dying in front of them so he knows that Raven wants to help in any way she can, she needs to feel useful. Raven quickly pulls a plastic chair for Clarke to take and the blonde starts preparing the needle and the blood bag, faintly registering that some of that equipment was brought from Mount Weather and has never been used but she doesn't have time to dwell on it.

Jackson straps the tubes down and inserts the needle into Clarke’s vein; the woman watches as the dark blood starts to flow through the tiny tube towards Atlantis’s body and Raven keeps watching doing whatever the doctor asks from her. It takes a long while but Jackson finally finishes his work on the stitches and puts some cream on the wound.

_“I’m going to put a bandage on her wound and I gave her some medicine for the pain so she can sleep for a while.”_

Jackson says and both Raven and Clarke nod as the blonde takes a deep breath and closes her eyes there was a time where she was the one receiving the dark blonde. But when she was entering the city of light things felt completely different, she didn’t care about Ontari; right now she can’t help but think that she cares deeply about Atlantis. Probably more than she should in such a short time considering that they barely know her.

**

As Murphy walks out of med bay and the Arkadia structure Emori is the first one to approach him, even though she hasn’t spent much time with the other grounder she felt at ease around her. So much so that she talked about the fact that she was always an outcast among her people and she was surprised to learn that Atlantis was a sort of outcast too from what she told her; at least she didn’t get the judgmental reaction she was used to from her people.

_“How is she?”_

Emori asks as she steps closer to Murphy and he sighs.

_“She has a nasty few cuts but I think she’s going to be alright.”_

Murphy says looking over his shoulder as Echo and Miller walk towards them with clean clothes but worry in his eyes.

_“Raven said you guys found a bear. Are you okay?”_

Murphy asks looking at his friends to make sure they are alright and Miller winces slightly with a nod.

_“Yeah.”_

_“I thought she was taking you to a good hunting spot.”_

Murphy says and Echo nods as she looks at the fire that Indra was wise enough to start among the chaos.

_“Echo?”_

Murphy asks and the former Azgeda spy sighs shaking her head at the loss for words but then Niylah nudges her with her shoulder and Echo sighs.

_“We don’t know what went wrong Murphy, we wanted to know more about her but before we knew what was going on someone was screaming for help and Atlantis knew right away it was Raven. After that_ everything happened just too _fast.”_

Echo explains carefully as Murphy nods and looks around and Miller shakes his head looking at the med’s bay direction.

_“What was Raven even doing there?”_

The man asks and Emori looks puzzled at him for a moment watching as Miller shakes his head frowning slightly in exasperation.

_“Are you really asking that question?_

_“What? Why? What am I missing?”_

Miller asks once more and Emori and Murphy share a knowing look but the woman shrugs. They have been noticing the amount of time Raven spends with Atlantis and how she’s somehow protective at times of the grounder; however, they aren’t sure if their suspicions are even correct so Emori just smiles and looks at Miller.

_“Raven probably just wanted to be sure that you guys didn’t scare Atlantis away.”_

There’s a pregnant pause and Miller looks at Echo as the woman gulps but remains silent and Indra clears her throat looking at the young faces around her.

_“I know we’re all curious to know who Atlantis was and how as a Nightblood she lived among us for so long without us noticing her but she’s one of us now and we should trust her as Raven did.”_

Indra says, her tone is definitive and Octavia nods at the woman’s words. It doesn’t surprise her as much as the others that no one ever noticed Atlantis, after all, Octavia lived under the floor for years and although that’s all but a distant memory now she knows that it’s not that hard to be invisible when there’s need for it.

Echo looks at Indra and sighs, she still remembers when she sneaked out during the conclave to make sure Roan would be the one winning, and she was one of the best spies in Azgeda so she’s more than familiar with the concept of going by unnoticed. Is it really that surprising that her path never crossed Atlantis’ one? Echo comes to the conclusion that it’s not, especially considering the woman’s blood, she looks around once more and can’t help but think that at some point all of the people in their group had done terrible things, Echo herself betrayed Bellamy and his people and yet they have forgiven her. If for some reason Atlantis doesn’t talk about her past because she did terrible things too, Echo will accept it after all the woman put herself in danger for Raven’s sake and Echo won’t ignore that.

**

The room is silent now, and the lights that by some miracle still work allow Jackson to keep tidying the place. As the man finishes his tasks he looks from Atlantis' sleeping figure to Clarke as the blonde smiles and nods. The worst part is over now, although Atlantis was in danger due to her blood loss she's young and strong and Jackson is confident that she will recover quickly. Raven is still watching over the woman like a hawk and Clarke can't help but wonder how in such a short time the grounder woman managed to captivate the Latina's heart, but then again time now is so relative and Raven still feels responsible for what happened.

_"Let's go, Raven, let's get you cleaned up and you have to eat something."_

Jackson says gently and Raven looks at him with a slight shake of her head as the man places his hands on her shoulders.

_"What if she wakes up?"_

_"She won't, we don't have much left here, but I gave her enough medicine for her to rest for a couple of hours."_

The doctor says softly but surely, squeezing Raven's shoulders and the woman gulps but nods as she turns her face to look at Clarke.

_"Will you stay with her? If she wakes up… I… I think she will get scared and feel trapped if she's alone here."_

_"I will make sure she's okay. Now go, get cleaned up and change, and when you come back bring something for us to eat."_

Clarke says with a smile while giving Raven a task so the Latina feels useful and the woman looks at Atlantis’ peaceful sleeping face.

_"I guess she will be hungry, okay I won't take long."_

Raven says grateful that she has something to do to help Atlantis, most of the time while Jackson and Clarke were attending to the young woman's wounds she just stood there hovering. Jackson steps out of the med bay and closes the door behind him, he still remembers how everything worked automatically before, the doors for certain areas would open just by passing by and some others would need a code and had a recognition system to allow passage. Those times are far behind them now and although the man was used to technology he can’t say he misses it much, it never let him feel the freedom he now experiences but the man won’t lie to have more areas of Arkadia functioning properly wouldn’t be bad especially considering the dangers they now face in living in the wild.

_“Are you hurt? You have some scratches; I can look at those if you want.”_

The man says and Raven looks at her hands, they were previously tainted by Atlantis’ blood but now they just have some wounds from when she fell.

_“There’s no need, thank you. I’ll just clean up before fetching some food for them.”_

_“Alright, I’ll brief the others then.”_

Jackson says gently and Raven smiles at him, it’s soft and genuine but Jackson can still see a shade of concern in the Latina’s brown gaze.

_“Thank you, Jackson, for everything.”_

_“I only did what I had to, she’s one of us now and she will be okay as long she rests.”_

The kind doctor says as he places one hand on Raven’s forearm and squeezes it slightly. The woman nods and walks away in the direction of the rooms. Once inside her bedroom Raven looks around, she needs to change and while she does so she thinks about what happened. Atlantis risked her life to save Raven’s and the Latina is not naïve, she knows that she wouldn’t have made it, even if she didn’t have a bad leg she wouldn’t be able to run from the beast. Raven took some classes with Pike, “surviving skills are crucial” the man repeated over and over again but the Latina doubts that even Pike would have the skills to defeat a bear.

As the Latina changes and puts the clothes away leaving them to wash later she thinks about Atlantis, the woman will need rest and although by now Raven can tell that Atlantis is rather independent she is determined to convince the woman to stay in Raven’s room so the Latina can watch over her. Raven can’t quite explain why she feels so charmed by the woman, the grounder has managed to even break through Clarke’s and Murphy’s walls, but for Raven, it seems different, she feels enchanted and it’s a completely odd feeling.

Slightly confused about what she’s feeling, Raven brushes her hair a little with her eyes closed, it’s tied in knots and she can feel some dry leaves falling from it. It’s not surprising considering that she fell on the ground and was almost pinned there with barely enough time to react. The Latina ponders for a brief moment if she should take a shower, back then in the Ark, not every room had private bathrooms, the ones who had them were usually used by the council members, and some areas of the Ark had almost the replicas of tiny apartments. Those were in a separate part of the one Raven and the others are using now, but still Clarke and Raven got rooms with private bathrooms and even though the heating system is not working properly Raven could use a shower.

Lingering in the room for a couple of minutes Raven groans in frustration, Atlantis is lying in a hospital bed and Clarke must be tired from the blood transfusion, later on Raven will have time to shower as long as she wants. But for now she wants to know that both Atlantis and Clarke are alright. At the present moment Raven needs to fetch water and some meat for her friends to eat and to be honest Raven herself needs to eat something too.

When Raven joins the rest of the group outside and while Murphy helps her with the food she can’t help but notice that the group is rather silent. The wary way in which they seem to be looking at her only makes her heavy heart clench harder in guilt.

_“Echo, Miller… I’m…”_

_“Let me stop you right there Raven.”_

Echo says as she stands from the trunk where she was sitting and walks up to Raven to put some water in one of the cups the Latina was holding and Raven looks at her surprised at the interruption.

_“I know that you want to apologize, we know…”_

The woman trails off looking at Miller who nods slightly and then back at Raven who is silently looking at her with a sorrowful expression.

_“We know that you went after us because you wanted to make sure we didn’t do anything to Atlantis, honestly you were doing what you always have done, looking out for all of us. We didn’t mean to hurt Atlantis, but we did want to see if we could make her talk more about herself, however, I’m no one to judge her, whatever she has done, whatever reason she has to not talk about her past, we should respect that and we’re sorry that you felt the need to protect her from us.”_

Echo says as everyone watches in silence and Raven can’t shake the feeling that the group has already talked about this while she was in the med bay. Niylah smiles almost proudly at Echo as she also stands up and picks up a tray for Murphy to place the plates on it.

_“We’re all starting a new life now, a peaceful one and we need to stick together to make the best of it.”_

Niylah says gently and Raven smiles and nods, she thought that Echo would berate her for what she did; the former Azgeda spy would often do it when they were in the space. Even though their life there was as peaceful as this one, Echo would always scold the Latina when she was overworking herself too hard. Raven accepts Niylah’s help to carry some food back to the med bay and can’t help but sigh in relief; all she needs now is to know that Atlantis is going to fully recover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you think?  
> Who is Atlantis and why is she so mysterious?  
> Thank you for reading this work and if you think it's any good share it, leave kudos and comments.  
> Stay tuned and stay safe! :D


	4. Atlantis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my dear Clexa lovers! :)  
> We have a new chapter to read and well the name says it all we're going to find out who Atlantis is.  
> I have to say this character was written for another fic, a canon fic that was taking place after Lexa's death. By then I wrote in Portuguese and I never finished that story.  
> So when the idea of writing this closure fic came to my mind I knew in that instant that I wanted to write this character.  
> I don't know about you guys but I really like her and she's my baby in a way.  
> Well, with this said I hope you enjoy this chapter.  
> Kudos and comments are always welcome.

**Chapter 4 – Atlantis**

As the door closes after Jackson’s and Raven’s departure Clarke exhales as she leans back on the plastic chair and closes her eyes thinking and thanking God or whatever high being that exists in the universe who answered her silent prayers for Atlantis.

_"You didn't have to save her and yet you did without a second thought."_

Clarke wants to groan, she hasn't heard that voice since she kissed Lexa, or rather the higher being and although a strange feeling of peace invades her at the sound of it she isn’t in the mood for riddles. She opens one eye to see Lexa standing at the end of Atlantis’s bed looking curiously at her and then at Clarke.

_"I told you, it's in our nature to care and love."_

Clarke says maybe a bit sharper than intended and Lexa turns to her with a small smile, it almost looks like she's amused somehow.

_"Few have spoken to us as you do, you know what we are capable of and yet you still seem ready to defy us."_

_"Maybe it's in my nature to challenge and question when something doesn't feel fair."_

Clarke says and then looks at Atlantis afraid that her voice will disturb the sleeping woman.

_"And was it fair to kill Cadogan when he was no threat to you?"_

_"Is it fair to judge a whole species from just one subject?"_

Clarke counters back and Lexa looks at her, her expression it's not harsh instead the woman looks puzzled, and before she has any chance to say something else Clarke is closing her eyes sighing deeply.

_"Look, I've come to enjoy your presence, I don't know why or even if this is some twisted test but Atlantis needs the rest and I'm not really in the mood to talk in riddles right now."_

Clarke says as Atlantis moves slightly in the bed and Lexa nods as if she was seeking answers and Clarke had just provided the higher being with them. The sound of footsteps echo from the corridor and Clarke doesn't even open her eyes to see Lexa vanishing.

_“Hey Clarke, were you talking? I heard your voice.”_

Raven says as she enters the room and looks at Atlantis who remains peacefully asleep. The Latina then thanks Niylah who smiles and nods before walking away and looking at Jackson as the man smiles and steps inside to check on Atlantis’s bandage and heartbeat.

_“I was just thinking out loud.”_

The blonde says as she grabs the cup of water Raven gives her and accepts the meat too. Jackson, after making sure that everything is alright, turns to Raven and smiles.

_“Call me if she wakes up or something changes.”_

The man says and both Clarke and Raven nod as the Latina pulls out another chair and sits down, Clarke can tell that her friend doesn’t want to talk and so she also remains silent as she thinks why would the being show up at such a moment. Clarke has given up on trying to fully understand the reasons why she still sees this being and part of her wants to talk about it but she fears that Raven will think she’s mad or just projecting something, either way, this is not the time to have such a conversation.

**

_"How are they?"_

Emori asks when Jackson sits down around the campfire with a sigh, even though they can now use some of the areas of Arkadia’s structure they always like to enjoy their time outside at the campfire, however at the moment they are sitting around the big fire for a completely different reason as they are still worry.

_"Clarke is recovering from the blood transfusion, but after eating something she will feel better as for Atlantis, she’s still sleeping but she will recover, obviously she will need to rest because of the stitches she need to stay in bed as the wound heals."_

Jackson says and Echo looks at him with an almost amused expression.

_"For some reason, I think we will have a hard time making her rest. I mean she hasn’t stopped since she joined us. You should have seen her today, she didn’t even flinch at the danger we faced."_

Echo says and Levitt looks at her.

_“Was it normal for you to face bears in your previous time on the ground?”_

Levitt asks slightly surprised, he knows what the group has been through; he saw it in Octavia's memories. The man is painfully aware of how relentless and ruthless their world used to be and yet he never saw memories of them fighting beasts.

_"Not that often but we were almost closed off in our tribes and political schemes."_

Echo says as Indra looks at her and sighs with a nod.

_“There was this one time where Clarke fought a panther though, I think it was around the time she left Arkadia after what happened in Mount Weather just before she was taken to Polis.”_

Niylah says as all eyes turn to her and a heavy silence falls upon them, those were dark times, no one could face themselves after what happened at Mount Weather, the genocide that took place there haunting for them all but Clarke took it harder than anyone else.

_“So we’re not talking about the fact that Atlantis is a Nightblood?”_

Gaia asks and Indra looks at her with a mix of emotions but as everyone shares curious looks Gaia shrugs as Indra clears her throat and holds everyone’s gazes steady before talking.

_"Regardless of who she was or how she kept herself hidden away from the flame keepers for so long, she's one of us now. No one knew about Madi either so maybe Atlantis' family didn't want us to know about her existence."_

Indra says wisely and Gaia nods, both women had seen the despair some parents showed when separating from their children so they could learn in Polis under the supervision of Heda, not everyone was as strong as the tradition demanded to let their loved ones go easily.

**

_"She looks so peaceful."_

Raven says in a whisper after long minutes in silence and looking down at Atlantis’s sleeping face and Clarke nods, the meat the Latina had brought to her making her feel better, less dizzy and less weak.

_"She does. But she's always calm, it's weird I always have this feeling of being at ease around her even though we know next to nothing about her._

Clarke says and Raven sighs as she moves next to Clarke leaning her head on her friend’s shoulder. The blonde sighs too and she can tell her friend is still shaken by what happened.

_"Hey, she's going to be fine."_

_"But it's still my fault Clarke, I thought Echo and Miller wanted to corner her somehow, I went after them and lost their tracks. When I realized that I was lost this big white bear was appearing out from nowhere and advancing on me. She… She put her own life at risk to save mine and with my actions I put Echo and Miller in danger too."_

Raven says, regret clear as day on her face and in her words and Clarke does the only thing she can think of, she turns in the chair and hugs Raven tightly.

_"You're all fine, we’re all fine. We just have to be more careful from now on."_

The blonde says as Raven wraps her arms around the blonde and sniffles slightly. They stay like that for a while until a muffled noise comes from the bed and Atlantis opens her eyes to see the two friends hugging, she smiles at the sight of them but her heart cracks a little for some reason. Raven hears her though and she immediately lets go of Clarke and stands to sit on the bed and looking carefully at Atlantis.

_"Hey, how are you feeling?"_

_"I had a strange dream. I… I dreamed Lexa was here."_

Atlantis says in a raspy voice and Clarke immediately grabs a cup of water and gives it for Atlantis to take a drink. The woman does so as Raven looks from the woman in the bed to Clarke.

_"Lexa? You knew her?"_

Raven asks curiously and Clarke looks down at Atlantis as the woman tries to sit up but winces a little. Both Clarke and Raven are quick to help her to make sure she doesn't put pressure on her wound.

_"Everyone knew Lexa, she was our Heda."_

Atlantis says simply and Clarke nods, it strikes her as strange that the woman dreamed with Lexa when the being was just there a few moments ago but she couldn’t have heard her.

_"She was also very important to Aden."_

Atlantis says and Clarke frowns a little looking at her with curiosity.

_"You knew him and the other initiates?"_

Clarke asks as memories of Lexa teaching the young group of children comes to her mind as she smiles fondly, of all the initiates Aden had left his mark on Clarke's life. Atlantis seems to read Clarke's smile well because she smiles too looking at the blonde.

_"He liked you too, you know? He said you made Lexa happy, when she made them vow to protect you I made the same promise. I just wish I had protected her too."_

Atlantis says in a small voice and Raven looks from her to Clarke as the blonde takes hold of Atlantis’s hand and squeezes it slightly making Atlantis's eyes turn to her with sadness in them.

_"Aden was a special kid."_

_"He was and I never had the chance to tell him the truth."_

At Atlantis's words, Clarke looks at Raven with a frown and Atlantis smiles sadly at them.

_"I guess that you've seen my blood now and we live in peace there's no reason for me to hide who I am anymore."_

_"You don't have to tell us anything if you don't want to."_

Raven says gently and Atlantis smiles and shrugs but the action just makes her pull up a painful face and Clarke looks with worry at her.

_"Hey, why don't you rest a while longer, and then we can talk? We will go to make arrangements for you. I think you should stay in my room for the next couple of days."_

The blonde says and Raven looks weirdly at her.

_"She can stay in my room. Yours only has one bed."_

The Latina says frowning slightly and Atlantis looks at the two of them curiously; she saw them hugging minutes before and although she doesn't remember seeing them together that much she assumed that the two of them were close.

_"I can stay in my room; it's just a few scratches anyway."_

The young woman says dismissively, despite her assumptions about their relationship she doesn't want to intrude in their lives or having to choose between them.

_"Just rest for a while now and we'll figure it out later okay?"_

Clarke says squeezing the woman's hand as she stands and Raven noticing as Atlantis is blinking sleepily stands too. As they walk out of the med bay Clarke turns to Raven and smiles.

_"I know you feel responsible for what happened and you want to look out for her, you should stay in my room. The bed is larger so is the room and we can ask the boys to bring another bed in so you can stay and look for her."_

Clarke says earnestly and Raven looks at her, the blonde didn't even want to sleep in one of the largest rooms to begin with so for her it's not that important still Raven needs to be sure.

_"You're sure you don't mind?"_

_"Of course not, it’s fine, she needs to be comfortable and she won't be able to move much in the next few days. Go and grab your things. I'll tell the others and ask Jackson to check on her again."_

**

_"This wasn't necessary."_

Atlantis says as Raven and Jackson help her settle down in the bed. Since they returned to Arkadia they have been collecting every useful item they could find and that meant pillows and bedsheets among other things. Clarke and Raven had set up the room for Atlantis and Miller and Murphy had brought a small single bed from one of the other rooms.

Even though Arkadia had some medicines and useful things, Atlantis's incident showed them that the earth has fewer resources than Sanctum and after discussing it with Clarke, Jackson decided to use the stone to go back to Sanctum and retrieve what they could for their planet. Hope, Jordan, and Levitt had gone with the doctor to help him retrieve more things and now Atlantis finds herself surrounded in even more comfort than before.

_"Of course it’s necessary. You're recovering from a serious wound and I want to personally take care of you."_

Raven says as she adjusts the pillow of her bed as Clarke helps Atlantis sit down on the other.

_"Clarke?"_

_"Yeah, is everything okay?"_

The blonde asks and Atlantis blushes a little and nods.

_"Yeah, I was just wondering… Do you think you can get some books for me to read? I know you have gone through a few already."_

Atlantis asks and Clarke looks at her quizzically.

_"You know how to read?"_

The blonde asks and winces slightly at her own question as Raven looks at her surprised at the blonde's bluntness. Although indeed, some of the grounders weren't exactly educated, the blonde never thought much about school, they were born warriors and the blonde perhaps wrongly assumed that school wasn't a thing they had. Atlantis snorts slightly at her but smiles afterwards with a gentle nod.

_"Of course I know how to read! I know the image you had of us when you came to earth, but every tribe had schools and preserved the basics of education even though the ways of the old ones were lost in many ways we learned to read."_

The young woman says and Clarke nods apologetically.

_"Of course, I… I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound rude."_

_"It's okay… I understand that your time here with us wasn't exactly enlightening and it was too short but I assumed Lexa had told you this while you were in Polis with her, after all, she was the first Heda to demand every child to go to school for at least 5 years."_

Atlantis explains and Clarke looks at her with a sad smile at the longing she feels for Lexa, however, although she knows Lexa always saw the bigger picture she is still surprised to know about this side of life in the ground.

_"I know that the initiates had lessons with Lexa and Titus, but we never had much time to share details about our backgrounds."_

Clarke says and Atlantis nods in understanding, back then she was aware of the tension between Azgeda and the rest of the Coalition, not every tribe shared Lexa's desire for peace and Azgeda most definitely didn’t want Lexa in charge undermining their hunger for power.

_"Lexa was one of the people who helped me learn how to read, she taught me when my aunt couldn't."_

At the woman’s words, Raven shares a look with Clarke, Atlantis is finally opening up about her previous life but even so there's still so much they still don't know that Raven can't help but be curious about this woman who is so caring and gentle and yet so deadly with a bow and arrow. As if sensing their curiosity growing Atlantis looks at Clarke and Raven and beckons them closer as they take a seat on the bed.

_"Lexa and I… we… we were friends, even before she became commander. I don't know if she ever knew I was a Nightblood but if she did she never brought it up. The truth is that when I was born, more or less around the same time Lexa was, the flame keepers had a large group of people in the tribes. As soon as they knew a child was born with dark blood they would take the child away from their parents and send them to Polis to be educated there and wait for the next conclave. That was what happened to Lexa, her mother died giving birth and she was sent to Polis right away."_

_"She never told me that."_

Clarke says in a small voice and Atlantis nods.

_"She was never proud of it, she had always understood that if all Nightbloods were taken to Polis and only one survived the conclave, the chances of extinction of Nightblood were higher, it's my understanding that Titus had served four commanders and he wasn't even that old."_

The woman says and Clarke nods, she faintly remembers Titus saying that to her, it’s such a distant memory now that it feels like it was several lifetimes ago.

_"Lexa changed that, when she became commander she determined that every child with dark blood should stay with their parents until they reached the right age to start training. But when we were born wasn't exactly like that and not everyone saw that having a child with dark blood was a blessing, some parents thought it would lead their children to an early death, like mine and that's why when I was born they left the Trikru village, so no one would find me. We lived in hiding for most of my childhood, we survived by trading and that was when I met Lexa, we were camping once outside Polis and Lexa was already an initiate. We became friends, my parents taught me how to hunt and track and basic fighting skills, Lexa taught me most of what she learned as a future Heda and warrior and how to read and my aunt taught me how to farm."_

Atlantis stops to drink some water and Clarke looks from her to Raven, it makes sense that some parents would hide their children, Nightblood was hereditary but if most of them were killed during the conclave the numbers would decrease, and yet by the looks of things there was always a group of initiates to assure that they would have a new commander regardless of how soon they would have to assume the throne.

It surprises Clarke to know that someone who seems to have lived in hiding most of her time knew Lexa so well, the fearless commander was so adamant in keeping her distance that it strikes the blonde as odd to know that she was once so close to Atlantis to teach her how to read and fight as an initiate too.

_"Lexa and I were close friends, even when she took the throne she kept in touch with me, it might have helped that I was the one who introduced her to Costia too."_

Atlantis says with a soft smile, the kind of smile of someone who is lost in memories, and Clarke smiles kindling at her.

_"She told me briefly about her once."_

Clarke recalls that moment by Finn's pyre when Lexa had tried to help Clarke how she could, the lesson she taught Clarke that day was one Clarke would never forget, although she never fully agreed with it. Even if she couldn't force Clarke not to care, the truth was Lexa had a point that the living would always be hungry and that meant that even if Clarke wanted to mourn her losses, she would have to care for the ones who were still with her.

_"What about your family?"_

Raven asks softly and Atlantis sighs and ducks her head slightly trying not to cry.

_"When Lexa ensured that every Nightblood would live with their parents until the age of training my mother had already given birth. My parents didn't want to risk my brother knowing about me and telling others, they were scared of what the council in Polis would do, so they returned to our village with my brother and I stayed with my aunt. I was always present in my brother's life but he never knew who I was, even when he left for Polis and I kept an eye on him. Or maybe he knew but remained silent. By then the coalition was already formed, even though Azgeda tried to wage a war against Lexa, killing Costia in hopes she would show herself not fit for the throne.”_

There is a pause and Raven looks at Clarke, the blonde nods having known from Lexa what happened and Atlantis sighs once more.

_“It was painful for her, she wanted to avenge her lover's murder but she couldn't, instead, she focused on hearing every clan, and assuring that the coalition wouldn't fall and that whoever took the throne after her would keep her legacy. Aden was always her favorite and she allowed me to see him often no matter how hard she tried, she never stopped caring, it was because of how much she cared about all of us equally that she was so adamant to keep the peace._

_"Aden was your brother?"_

Clarke asks surprised as Atlantis nods and the blonde sighs, Atlantis and Aden aren't exactly similar physically but there's a sort of aura that is indeed quite similar, that must be why as soon as she met her, Clarke thought that Atlantis reminded her of someone.

_"I never told him we were family and before I knew he was the last family I had."_

Atlantis says and Clarke and Raven can hear the way her voice cracks while voicing her words. Raven moves up on bed sitting next to Atlantis and pulls her in for a half hug, with one of Raven's arms around her shoulders the young woman sniffles but her eyes remain cast onto her lap.

_"Even though the coalition was fragile we lived in peace but we still had the Mountain Men as an enemy, their reapers were savages and when it wasn't the wild men it was the acid fog, I don't even know what happened but they killed my dad."_

Clarke's heart sinks at this; she pulled the lever that killed all those people with Bellamy's help but the ones who had fallen before that, those were countless.

_"After what happened in Mount Weather I got home I saw my aunt's lifeless body. She died fighting the last mountain man."_

_"Emmerson?"_

Clarke asks astonished, a heavy pang crashing into her heart as she realizes that she was the one who let him go and be alive. Atlantis smiles sadly as if to assuage the blonde and continues.

_"I killed him, I think he thought he could use our home, my aunt and I lived outside Trikru lands and he must have thought it was a safe place to live, he cowardly attacked my aunt, she died at the hands of a coward much like my mom but I made sure our fight was fair, that was what my father would have done."_

_"I'm… I'm really sorry."_

Raven finds herself whispering bringing the woman closer to her as Atlantis shakes her head slightly.

_"I know that it wasn't your doing. My mom died outside these lands shortly after, she was among the army sent here to protect your people…… I couldn’t even say goodbye to any of them and I… I admit though that after all that I had a desire to fight by Luna's side, end our lives, but my promise to Aden weighted more and when Octavia won the conclave and said we would all have a chance to survive I did what my parents always taught me, I was invisible and got inside the bunker… I knew that even if Octavia was fighting for Wonkru there were still some people who wanted Wanheda's head…"_

There's a pregnant pause then and Clarke looks at Raven, she has no idea of what to say, they always wanted to know Atlantis's story but they couldn't imagine that the reason why she was so guarded was because she had such a past. Atlantis shakes her head letting out a humorless chuckle.

_"Ironically, I decided to live to protect you but you weren't even in the bunker. And after that, it was such a complex mess that I found myself wanting to survive just because Indra and Octavia needed an army and I was good at that: killing people. Although I never enjoyed it, I know I was good at it and then just when I thought I would face my last war, Indra and Octavia were stopping it. I came back because this is my home. What good it was to exist forever if the ones I love weren't there with me right? I wouldn't mind being alone if at least I had the chance to live like my family always wanted to."_

Atlantis says in a small voice and Raven lifts her chin with one hand and looks deeply into bright light brown eyes.

_"You're not alone now."_

There's some intimacy in their touch and Atlantis doesn't seem to mind, she gulps and nods as Clarke clears her throat and stands from the bed.

_"You should rest now. I'll ask Jackson to check on your wounds later."_

The blonde says as she walks towards the door as Raven helps Atlantis settle down and the blonde waits for her outside the door, although they are building a new life Clarke realizes that everyone in their group has faced more than they should, Atlantis’s past just another reminder of how cruel life can be. There’s a nagging feeling in the blonde’s chest, she let Emmerson go and he killed Atlantis’s aunt, she left Arkadia and was taken to Polis abandoning Bellamy and he sided with Pike, helping him to become chancellor and they viciously attacked an army during the night like cowards, a group of people that was at Arkadia to fulfill Lexa’s promise to Clarke, the promise of taking in her clan like the others and treat Clarke’s people as her own, all those people died and although Pike and Bellamy died too, for people like Atlantis justice was never properly served.

Clarke can’t help but feel like she has to repay the woman somehow; after all, Atlantis has put her vengeful desires aside to protect Clarke and her people. And the blonde now realizes that maybe she was a hypocrite, after all, Lexa’s words echoing in her mind about how it wouldn’t matter if was Lexa’s people bleeding because even though it pained Clarke to see what Pike and Bellamy have done she accepted it but when Madi was left behind in a limp body Clarke didn’t have second thoughts about avenging her by killing Cadogan.

**

Later on that day Clarke tries to summarize the best she can what Atlantis told them. Indra seems visibly touched by all of the pain that the woman endured and she is especially touched by the fact that even in her invisibility Atlantis had made sure to look out for the new commander during their five years in the bunker.

_"I think it's for the best if we don't probe more into her life now, we know enough. And that goes especially for you two Jordan and Hope."_

Indra says sternly, she knows that besides Levitt, the young couple is the most prone to let their curiosity wander with no restrictions sometimes, obviously, they don't do it maliciously but still, the woman wants to make sure that from now on the group will be more careful about the stories and questions they tell and ask. Everyone has a rough past, and just like Atlantis, all of them have their wounds and scars to heal but Indra thinks it's better if they open up on their terms much like Gaia and herself have been doing.

As everyone nods and Jordan seems to let Atlantis's story sink in, the group decides to change the subject and focus on the future ahead of them.

**

It has been a couple of hours since Raven and Clarke left Atlantis sleeping and returned to the group. Gaia and Indra are grilling some meat on the fire as Levitt tells them that the next morning he will go with Octavia to try and catch some fish. Jordan and Hope easily agree to join them. Now that Atlantis is out of the woods the group can enjoy their night at ease and as the night falls and the sky turns into a dark blue the group starts arranging and discussing what tasks everyone will be doing the next day.

_"I am going to check on Atlantis."_

Jackson says as he finishes his meal and prepares something for the recovering woman to eat too. Raven stands nodding at him as she wipes her hands on her jeans, the day is finally catching up with her and she needs a quick shower before going to bed.

_"I'll go with you, she was still sleeping the last time I checked but if she wakes up I don't want her to think we don't care about her."_

The Latina says as Clarke raises an eyebrow at her but remains silent and Murphy snorts with a smirk on his face.

_“Nurse Raven, you never cease to surprise me, Reyes.”_

_“Don’t be jealous Murphy; I’m sure Emori is more than capable of handling you.”_

The Latina says and Emori laughs at ease with the friendly banter, she squeezes Murphy’s forearm and looks mischievously at Raven.

_“I haven’t had any complaints until now isn’t that right Murphy?”_

The woman says as Raven laughs and everyone chuckles slightly, Jackson places the food he previously prepared into a tray and nods at Raven as Murphy watches them go and looks from Emori to Clarke with a knowing look in his blue eyes.

_“I think our mechanic friend here has a small crush on the grounder warrior.”_

The man says as Clarke grins and nods.

_“Just a small crush?”_

_“Guys give her a break okay? I think that after today we’re all charmed by Atlantis.”_

Echo says as Niylah looks from her to the rest of the group and sighs.

_“Yeah, she’s been nothing but helpful, and her knowledge of our surroundings is highly appreciated, especially now that we know that we’re not the only ones on this planet. I mean I’m glad that the animals have managed to survive and reproduce but we should map which places where we can and can’t go.”_

_“Niylah is right, we have to be careful from now on, Jackson might be a great doctor but we’re not fully equipped to deal with this sort of incidents that often.”_

Octavia says and Clarke nods, they have to make a plan for the future, and if it’s up to her that it will not include staying at the decaying structure of Arkadia but they need to think of a proper place to stay and live and prosper for as long as they can.

**

As Raven and Jackson stop at the room's door the Latina ponders for a moment if she should knock or not, Atlantis already knows that she will share the room with her but it still feels slightly rude to just go inside without a warning and so the Latina knocks on the door twice before opening it.

_"What the heck are you doing?"_

Raven asks as she walks inside and sees Atlantis placing her bare feet on the cold metallic floor. The girl looks startled at her and frowns.

_"I'm trying to go outside for a little while. Can't I go out? Am I a prisoner or something?"_

The young woman asks, still frowning as she tries to stand but winces, and Raven is quick to walk further forward to steady her. Jackson, having walked in just after Raven with the tray of food in his hands, turns his back to the girl as he notices that she's only wearing a gown.

_"Of course you're allowed to go out, it's just you can't right now."_

Raven says softly as she helps Atlantis to sit down in bed again and the young woman groans annoyed and pouts like a kid, and Raven can’t help but find it endearing.

_"I'm… I was just tired of being here alone."_

The grounder warrior says in a small voice blushing slightly and Raven looks at her with a small smirk.

_"Missing me already?”_

The Latina says teasingly and Atlantis huffs but blushes as she seems to finally take notice of her half-naked state and covers herself with the bedsheets looking at Jackson's back.

_"You can turn around now Jackson, she's decent now."_

Raven says, her voice showing her amusement and Atlantis looks from the Latina to the kind doctor as Jackson walks further inside the room with a tray in his hands as the grounder warrior looks curiously at him.

_"I just need to look at your wounds and we brought you some food."_

The doctor says placing the tray on a bedside table and Atlantis nods as she lays down and Raven helps her pull the gown up so Jackson can see the wounds. As Raven's fingers trace across the woman's skin Atlantis looks at her with a surprised face. The Latina notices the goosebumps on pale skin and gulps clearing her throat and looking at Jackson.

_"Do you need anything Jacks? How is she?"_

Raven asks looking at the doctor as Jackson carefully inspects the wounds underneath the bandage and sighs.

_"This will take a few days to fully start to heal, you shouldn't move on your own, you see the area of your injuries is very soft, the tender skin can rip at the sutures if you're not careful. I know you don't like it but I do think you should rest and stay in this room for a couple of days. Just enough time so the skin can repair itself with the stitches help."_

Atlantis nods at Jackson's soft tone, since she came to Arkadia besides Clarke and Raven the doctor has always been gentle with her, he never asked hard questions and he always respected her. Not that the others disrespected her, but Jordan and Hope can be a little overwhelming as for the others she noticed that they didn't fully trust her apart from maybe Octavia and surely Murphy.

_"I know a few herbs that could help me with this."_

The young woman says and Jackson looks at her with interest.

_"You know how to distinguish the medicinal herbs from the others?"_

He asks excitedly, he has read about many herbs that can act as medicine but he never had the time to fully study the subject. Atlantis nods with a smile.

_"Yeah, until your arrival herbs were everything we had. I can pick the ones we need for medicine and there's a few we can use to cook too."_

The young woman says and Raven looks at Jackson with a careful expression.

_"Does she need those herbs? Because I sure as hell don't want her out of this room until I know it's safe for the stitches not to burst."_

_"Well no, I mean we still have some stuff here, and we got whatever there was in Sanctum, but her knowledge can come in handy in the future. Don't worry Raven I'm not letting your girlfriend out of this room either."_

The man says teasingly and Raven huffs at the joke missing the way Atlantis’s eyes sparkle at it. When the doctor leaves the room promising to be back the next morning Atlantis sighs and moves in the bed putting her feet on the floor once more.

_"I… I need to use the bathroom."_

The woman says blushing profusely when Raven looks unimpressed at her, shuffling her feet on the floor Atlantis pulls the gown down and Raven helps her stand with a smile.

_"Come on then great warrior I'll escort you there."_

Raven says teasingly and Atlantis rolls eyes but thanks her for the help anyways, the woman is not used to having people helping her, she spent most of her life living in the shadows as if it was a coat of invisibility, never trusting people outside her family, Costia and Lexa and it feels slightly embarrassing to accept Raven’s help especially for something so trivial. Although the woman has to admit that the wound seems to burn her skin whenever she applies pressure on it. As Raven holds her close to her body and walks at a slow pace to the bathroom Atlantis is forced to think that maybe asking for help it’s not a sign of weakness as her ancestors told her it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what are your thoughts?  
> Do you like Atlantis's background story?  
> Were you expecting it?


	5. A new home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Welcome back!  
> I just want to start by saying that your theories and thoughts about Atlantis made me smile, seeing you so curious about a character that I made from the scratch was very comforting. As I said before this was a character that I had on another work, an unfinished one in Portuguese and that her background was pretty much used fully here.  
> It was called to my attention that there are some discrepancies between this story and the facts of the show, I want to apologize for it but I have to be honest and say that I don't remember much about the show as a whole and in details so I tried to make the best to this particular story line and to make it more plausible after the final episode.  
> With this said I hope you guys enjoy it, kudos and comments are always welcome! :)  
> Happy readings and stay safe!

**Chapter 5 – A new home**

The sound of the strong wind rustling outside brings Clarke back from dreamland and she blinks sleepily as she hears the sounds of nature outside. It's such a simple thing: the sound of the wind and rain on the rooftops and metallic walls echoing through the room and yet Clarke can't help but smile as she enjoys the soft music of the drops falling like drums on the metal.

_"I think I understand why this corporeal form is so appealing to you."_

_"Jesus fuck!"_

Clarke says as she sits up in the bed and looks around, Lexa is standing next to the round window looking outside with a peaceful expression.

_"Don't you know in that vast knowledge of yours that is rude and creepy to just show up like this in someone's room?"_

Clarke asks annoyed and sarcastically as she pulls her sheets and blanket up higher as if to cover herself and Lexa turns around with a confused expression.

_"My apologies, it wasn't my intention to scare you."_

The being says and has the decency of genuinely apologizing and Clarke huffs as she turns around in the bed and places her bare feet on the cold floor. Then the blonde stands as Lexa stares at her and Clarke crosses her arms clearing her throat pointedly and the being turns around and watches the weather outside again.

Clarke starts to move around the room to fetch some clothes and mumbling something about the lack of sense of privacy and the being frowns.

_"You kissed me!"_

The being says simply as if it was enough to justify their presence and Clarke stops as she pulls her pants over her legs and shakes her head.

_"I seem to recall you kissed me too and that's not how this works anyway."_

The blonde says as she pulls a sweater over her body and Lexa sighs.

_"Do you want to go for a walk Clarke?"_

The being asks and Clarke looks at her puzzled as if the being had grown two heads.

_"It's raining."_

_"Exactly, I would like to know how it feels."_

At the being's words, Clarke stares at her back and sighs, although the weather is changing and it's colder now than a few days ago and she finds herself thinking that for some reason she can't say no to this being, not when she sees Lexa. For a moment she thinks of how it would be if Lexa wasn't killed, would the two of them be able to overcome their differences? Would Lexa come to Arkadia under the excuse of wanting to oversee if the sky people were following the rules just to be with Clarke? A part of her tells her that Lexa would have done exactly that.

However so much has happened after Polis that Clarke can’t help but feel like her thoughts are childish, even if her mind betrays her and Clarke can’t stop herself from thinking that maybe if Lexa was alive, if Madi still had the flame in her when she transcended and took Lexa and the other commanders with her Lexa could have perhaps come back to be with Clarke. As it is Lexa was dead and lost to the universe before that, the only true commander who would deserve to transcend after all the burdens she took on her shoulders, and all Clarke can do now is to enjoy this being’s company in a silly attempt to keep a part of Lexa with her.

As Clarke walks out of the room, she is careful and silent, not wanting to be caught leaving so early in the morning alone, especially when it has been only a week since the incident with Atlantis. Once outside Clarke can't help but look at Lexa, the being is walking under the rain with a soft smile playing on her lips feeling the drops of water fall on her and Clarke shakes her head slightly.

_"Have you found the answers you've been looking for?"_

The blonde asks, breaking the silence in a soft voice. Over the last weeks and putting in perspective her conversations with this higher being Clarke has concluded that this being is searching for something and although the blonde doesn’t know exactly what it is that the being is looking for, she knows that it must be a reason for her to keep seeing Lexa.

_"Why did you love Lexa?"_

The being asks instead and Clarke looks at her with a puzzled expression. She's not even sure she can answer this question. Can someone explain why they fall in love with another person? At the being's expectant gaze Clarke sighs.

_"Lexa was special, she was wise and brave, above all for all the rough and harsh edges of her life on earth she was caring, all she wanted was to achieve peace between her people and she succeeded in that where many others failed. She saw me for who I was, and she never judged me for my mistakes and actions even when they clashed against her own. In a way, if there is such a thing as soulmates, she would have been mine."_

Clarke answers earnestly, surprising even herself with the words, perhaps she has been reading too many romances, the being nods and looks at her.

_"Would you choose her over transcending if that was an option? Like your friends chose to come back?"_

_"Why are you asking me this now? Is this some kind of twisted painful test? Because if so let me tell you that I'm not in the mood for more riddles."_

Clarke says as the raindrops start to fall heavier and Lexa looks up at the sky, Clarke sighs as she looks up too, the wind is now blowing with more force, the sound of trees dancing with it reaching Clarke's ears and the blonde closes her eyes inhaling deeply.

_"Look around you! This planet is alive, it's vibrant with its colors and sounds, to me it feels a waste to not be able to live in it in peace with or without Lexa in it, and this is our home, where we belong. So, if there was such a thing as an option to come back for her I would."_

The blonde says and Lexa looks at her and nods.

_"You're getting cold."_

The woman says simply as Clarke shivers slightly and nods.

_"Go back to your friends Clarke. I think I got all the answers I was searching for."_

There's something in the way the being speaks that makes Clarke look at her with a frown. Although she doesn't really know why but it feels like a goodbye and Clarke despite everything is not quite ready for it. She will have to say goodbye to Lexa once more and even if it's not really her it's still the vivid image of her in a corporeal form for no one but Clarke.

_"Is this… Is this goodbye?"_

The blonde asks and the being smiles slightly with a shrug.

_"Who knows?"_

The being says and with that, they start to walk away until they disappear from Clarke's line of sight, and the blonde shudders once more. She feels cold, the rain soaking her clothes, and sadly Clarke won't be able to sit by the fire to warm up, the shelter where the fire is might protect her from the rain, but it won't protect her from the strong wind.

With a sad sigh and a last look in the direction in which the being left Clarke nods to herself and starts to walk in the direction of Arkadia’s structure.

**

Luckily for Clarke when she returns to Arkadia's structure everyone is still in their rooms and Clarke manages to get back inside unnoticed. The weather is less inviting to go out now than when the blonde left and Clarke can only assume that her friends are either sleeping or gathering the courage to go out. Even in the shelter of Arkadia away from the harsh weather Clarke feels like the metallic structure is not that inviting either, the heating mechanism suffered irreparable damage over the years and Raven can't seem to be able to fix it.

They still managed to make the water heat long enough for Clarke to be able to strip off her clothes and take a warm shower, as long as she keeps it short. When she is done with her shower she dresses in comfortable warm clothes and decides to write in her diary.

It is a strange thing but after what happened and Lexa's short visits the blonde felt the need to put her memories on paper and stories alongside doodles of her family, friends, and loved ones. Clarke can't help but write about her encounters with Lexa, the higher being had become a sort of comforting presence in the blonde's life even though the being’s visits are always short-lived.

As she writes down their last conversation, she can't stop herself but ask what was this being looking for? Was it something related to the human race or Clarke alone? There's so much Clarke doesn't understand yet, she doubts she ever will but as it is, she's not disappointed or frustrated with it, since she returned from her test she has been living in peace and that's all she ever wanted.

**

Another week goes by with strong winds, some storms, and heavy rain. The group has been pretty much trapped in their wing in Arkadia's structure and as the days go by everyone is getting more and more on edge. The changes in the weather are the biggest factor in their somber mood.

Clarke finds herself in a room where the group has been meeting regularly and she can feel a headache forming as Miller, Murphy, and Echo speak over each other as if they were having a debate. The truth is that they have been staying in Arkadia for longer than they anticipated, and they are tired of it.

_"We could go to a village close to the valley if you wanted."_

Atlantis says softly and low almost as if she was thinking out loud. Even above the raised voices, Clarke heard the soft woman's words. The blonde looks at her as Atlantis shyly lifts her gaze to meet Clarke's.

_"Guys, can you please shut up for a minute? I think Atlantis has something to say."_

Clarke says feeling the need to calm down the others and Atlantis shyly wraps the blanket around her shoulders. Her recovery is going well but slowly, and Raven has been with her every step of the way. In fact, it was the Latina who had wrapped the blanket around the woman's body, the structure is getting too cold and Atlantis despite feeling better is still recovering from her injuries, so when Raven told her they would gather in one of the rooms to discuss the next few weeks she shook her head and told Raven that it wasn’t the place for her but the Latina had smiled and placed the blanket around Atlantis' strong shoulders and had kissed softly on the cheek stating that Atlantis’ voice is as important as any other. The gesture only made Atlantis grow more aware of her attraction and affection towards the Latina but even though they have been closer than before she can't muster the courage to talk about her feelings. At Clarke’s strong voice everyone shuts up as the blonde looks at Atlantis with a nod.

_"I think we can go to a village close to the valley. Wasn't the valley the place we wanted to be in all along?"_

Atlantis asks softly, she doesn't like to be the center of the attention, after living in the shadows for so long it feels uncomfortable to have all eyes on her but she's not blind to the changes in the group’s humor. Even if she is pretty much in her room for most of the time, she had noticed how Octavia is on edge the longer she stays in Arkadia and if Indra's and Clarke's sore moods are any indication of it she can guess they don't like it much either.

_"Do we even know if we have a chance to live there? For all we know the valley might be destroyed like Polis."_

Miller says and Niylah gulps at the thought, Octavia did unspeakable things over her fight for that piece of land they called Eden. Raven looks curiously at Atlantis; she knows the woman wouldn't bring this up if she didn't know something that they don't.

_"The valley we fought for is destroyed but it isn’t the only place that survived the second Praimfaya. On the other side of it, there’s another valley. There are enough houses there for every single one of us and pretty much every house has a fireplace to keep us warm and cozy during the winter. Not to mention that the river is pretty close, and the surrounding forest will allow us to have plenty of hunting grounds."_

_"How do you know all that?"_

Niylah asks carefully and Atlantis sighs with a shrug.

_"I was planning on living there myself… Before… You know… I encountered you all."_

The woman says and the silence that follows her words tells her that the group is still unsure about what to think.

_"I was on my way to the bunker to get some stuff, my old clothes and things like that before settling there. Surely there'll be some work to do there, like fixing doors and windows but I think we can get all of what we need between here and the bunker to live there."_

The young woman says with a little more confidence and Raven smiles as she gets up from her chair and walks up to Atlantis placing a soft comforting hand on her shoulder.

_"Then it's settled. As soon as we can we will go there, and make a list of what we need, we can use the rover to make the trips, there haven't been a lot of sunny days but the few we had is enough to keep the batteries charged."_

_"We can even use the stone to go back to Sanctum and bring two of their motorcycles along with whatever we might need."_

Octavia says cheerfully and smiling brightly at Atlantis as if she was thankful for the perfect escape plan from Arkadia. As everyone settles on the details with Emori taking notes of what she and Raven will need to do, Latina pulls a chair to sit next to the grounder warrior and grabs her hand.

_"And here I thought I was the only genius here. My great mind must be rubbing off on you."_

The Latina says with a playful smirk as she squeezes the woman's hand making her blush and Atlantis ducks her head slightly. For some reason, she has a feeling that Raven just enjoys teasing her and despite what they both have been through they enjoy their light-hearted moments more than they say.

**

_"Hey what's wrong?"_

Echo asks as she walks in the room and notices Niylah deep in thought, the dark blonde-haired woman lifts her eyes from the book she was reading and looks at Echo with a sigh.

_"Nothing, I'm just reading."_

The woman replies looking back at the pages and Echo looks at her with a frown. Throughout the last few weeks, they have been growing closer, more than anyone suspects, they tease and joke with each other and the others but at night they often share the same bed just for the sake of having someone else by their side or so Niylah had thought. Atlantis' words about everyone being able to have a little house for themselves had hit her more than she cares to admit but now that everything is decided, and Echo will leave the next morning with Miller, Clarke, and Raven to see the valley she can't help but wonder if Echo will want to have her own cozy cabin.

_"I know something is bothering you. Is it the mention of the valley and what happened there?"_

Echo asks as she sits down on Niylah's bed and assumes that perhaps the memories cast a somber mood over the woman’s calm personality.

_"No, it's not that. I think it will be nice to finally settle somewhere, create our own little village."_

_"Then what is it?"_

_"Will you want to have a home of your own? I mean Atlantis said there are enough cabins for us all… I was… I just got used to living with you know… What we have here, it's… It's a nice arrangement."_

The woman all but mumbles and Echo looks puzzled for a second but then smiles. Living in peace brought a soft side of her she didn't even know she had but that Niylah seems to be able to easily pull out of her.

_"Are you asking me if I want to live with you?"_

Echo asks carefully not wanting to jump to conclusions or get ahead of herself but the way Niylah is avoiding her gaze is enough of an answer. In a sudden burst of affection that Echo can't quite place she tilts Niylah's chin up and kisses her gently before pulling back slowly to look softly at the other woman.

_"I quite enjoy it too, the arrangement we have."_

_"Yeah?"_

Niylah asks surprised and Echo smiles leaning in to kiss Niylah once more, this time the kiss is deeper, and Echo grabs the book Niylah had settled on her lap and tosses it randomly on the floor.

_"Yeah, and since I'm leaving tomorrow, I think we should enjoy this night."_

Echo says in between kisses as Niylah smiles and they start to slowly undress each other as they fall into the now familiar dance of their bodies.

**

Clarke knocks on the door carefully afraid that the people inside the room are not ready yet and waits as the door opens and Raven smiles.

_"Good morning Clarke."_

The Latina says with a smile opening the door more and inviting Clarke in. The blonde walks further forward into the room and smiles at Atlantis.

_"Now that you're here can you check on Atlantis? I still have to make sure the rover is charged for the trip."_

Raven asks and Clarke nods as Raven looks fondly at the woman sitting in the bed.

_"She's a tough patient but I trust you to handle her."_

Raven says teasingly and Atlantis rolls her eyes.

_"I really don't understand why I can't come with you."_

The woman says with a pout and Raven chuckles as she goes to her bed to grab a jacket and then walks towards Atlantis and kisses the top of her head.

_"I'll come by before we leave."_

She says and Atlantis nods as Clarke watches the scene, she can see the affection Raven is showing towards the other woman and it warms her heart. She feels a pang of jealousy at the knowledge that she will never have that connection with anyone else, but she pushes those thoughts to the back of her mind as she walks closer to Atlantis to check on her wounds and Raven leaves the two of them alone.

Clarke silently takes off Atlantis’s bandage and starts cleaning the wounds, carefully inspecting the skin tissue and nodding to herself satisfied with what she sees and applies a new clean bandage. Atlantis watches her carefully.

_"I thought you would be happier for leaving Arkadia for a couple of days."_

The woman comments lightly and Clarke sighs and looks at her with a soft smile.

_"I am happy; if you’re right about this place I think it will be the perfect one for us to settle in for the future."_

_"Then why do you look sad?"_

Atlantis asks bluntly in her simple way and Clarke looks at her puzzled, she’s not sure how Atlantis seems to read her so well.

_"I guess I'm just worried."_

_"It's going to be fine Clarke; we will have our homes and everything we need to live in peace and comfort. I'm thinking we can farm some things too; I saw seeds and fruit trees in Sanctum. I already told Murphy to fetch me some when he goes there. I think I'll enjoy the work, it's peaceful."_

The grounder warrior says hopefully and Clarke smiles. She's not sure how can Atlantis be so sweet and gentle despite all that she endured and survived. Hope and Jordan also have that childlike innocence but no matter what, they saw far less than the others, they have taken fewer lives too, and Levitt lived his life according to the Shepherd's beliefs with everyone in Bardo, although he is a skillful fighter as the other disciples were, he didn’t have to do and see what Atlantis has experienced. Atlantis even though she had seen and done unimaginable things since she was a child, she never allowed her heart to be tainted by it. And although she is growing closer to Raven and everyone else, she was willing to live alone while Clarke on the other hand couldn’t even face the possibility of living like that, at least she still had Picasso but, in her heart,, she simply can't accept the fact that won't see Lexa again.

_"What's wrong Clarke?"_

Atlantis asks again when she notices how silent the blonde is and Clarke just stares at her unsure of what to say. How can she explain that after all this time she still loves Lexa and that the being in Lexa's form just made her more aware of her loneliness?

_"You know you can tell me whatever it is that it's bothering you. I don't think I will be surprised after all I've seen."_

Atlantis says with a chuckle and Clarke can't help but feel a rush of affection towards this woman who just came into her life a few weeks ago but is already particularly important to her. The blonde all but sits down next to Atlantis and lets her head fall on the warrior's shoulder as she cries.

_"I miss Lexa."_

Clarke says as she sobs, and Atlantis is taken aback by the blonde's proximity and admission, unsure of what to say she does what she can. She puts one arm around the blonde's shoulders bringing her even closer trying to comfort her as she can and Clarke gives herself this one moment of a warm touch, something she has been craving for longer than she would like to admit.

_"I know."_

The warrior says and she speaks so earnestly that Clarke can't help but lift her head slightly to look at her and Atlantis smiles.

_"We all miss someone; you shouldn't hide your feelings or feel ashamed of showing them."_

Atlantis says gently and Clarke can’t explain the reason why but somehow the soft reassurance and Atlantis’ warm embrace are enough to help her calm down a little.

_"I saw her you know? When… When I killed Cadogan… to transcend we have to take a test, and these tests are brought to you by someone you knew and lost."_

_"I know it’s someone who meant a great deal to the person who is taking the test."_

Atlantis replies, she had talked to Raven about it briefly in the last few days, Clarke sighs and nods.

_"For me, it was Lexa, whoever these high beings are, they are in all intents and purposes the vivid image of that person but for some reason, they kept showing up even after the test was over and it was always Lexa. Seeing her but knowing it's not her it's heartbreaking. I'm here now, we live in peace, but I can't help but feeling like I'm alone."_

The blonde says and the sadness in her voice is enough to make Atlantis' heart break, she gently cradles Clarke's face with her palm and smiles.

_"You're not alone Clarke, I vowed to protect you, I owe that to Lexa and Aden and you, I probably wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you. So, whatever you need, someone to listen, a shoulder to cry on, someone to hold you, or anything else I'm right here."_

Atlantis says sincerely and Clarke looks at her, she's not sure about what Atlantis is offering, the woman’s look tells Clarke she means it, but the blonde is not sure if Atlantis even realizes what she can be offering now.

Clarke sighs. Wouldn’t be that bad to contemplate the woman's offer? Looking at it on a deeper level Atlantis is a gentle person and Clarke can tell she’s devoted to what she fights for, she kept a promise she made Aden years ago, she is a beautiful woman and she's sweet and caring and although Clarke is completely surprised by her chain of thoughts, she thinks that she would be capable of enjoying Atlantis' company. Forcing herself to think with more clarity the blonde decides to accept the woman's friendship offer, and her support because that's all Clarke can ask from her. Clearing her throat slightly Clarke smiles and shakes her head.

_"What about Raven?"_

The blonde finds herself asking and she’s not even sure why as Atlantis blushes slightly and ducks her head down. The woman's reaction is enough for Clarke to confirm her suspicions.

_"What about her?"_

_"You like her, don't you?"_

Clarke asks now fully interested in hearing the woman too instead of just crying like a lost soul and Atlantis shrugs as if she's afraid of answering but eventually she does.

_"She's my friend, but that's all."_

_"I think there's more to it than you know."_

The blonde says and Atlantis shakes her head slightly.

_"She wouldn't look at me like that."_

The young woman says simply and Clarke sighs, the blonde woman can understand the deeper meaning in the woman’s words. Raven is bright and intelligent, Clarke can see that in Atlantis’ eyes there are too many differences between them, she can’t help but think that perhaps Atlantis’ is thinking of herself in a self-deprecating way and it pains her to see it because by now everyone has noticed how amazing the grounder warrior is. The blonde suspects that Raven is already looking at the warrior differently, however, it's not Clarke's place to tell Atlantis that, instead she smiles and nudges the woman slightly.

_"You know there's only one way to find out."_

Clarke says instead, planting the seed of possibility in Atlantis’s mind and as they look at each other the door to the room opens and Raven walks in frowning when she notices the proximity between the other two women. Clarke all but feels Raven glaring in her direction and stands winking at Atlantis who looks from the blonde to Raven's serious expression.

_"I'll give you some time, think about it."_

The blonde says squeezing Atlantis’s shoulder and then she starts walking away, as she walks past Raven she smirks at her and the Latina feels even more confused about the whole ordeal. The Latina walks further into the room and sits down on the bed looking carefully at Atlantis.

_"Jackson and Niylah will come by later to check on you and take you outside."_

_"I wish I could go too. I'm tired of being here."_

The woman complains crossing her arms with a furrow on her brow and Raven smiles.

_"Don't worry we're just going to be away for a couple of days and soon enough you'll be fully recovered, and I'll keep an eye on Clarke for you."_

Raven says softly and tentatively just to see Atlantis’ reaction and when the woman sighs and nods Raven's smile falters slightly and she turns slightly to stand from the bed. Atlantis quickly takes hold of her wrist gently and Raven loses her balance and sits down again and before she has the chance to say anything else Atlantis is leaning in grazing her lips over Raven's soft ones. It's a chaste brief kiss and when Atlantis pulls away, she looks down at her hands on her lap.

_"I'll be here waiting."_

The woman mumbles still clearly upset by her lack of freedom while blushing and Raven although surprised by the woman's actions still hears the undertone in her words as if Atlantis is making some sort of promise. Still dumbfounded, Raven nods and stands, as she walks out, she looks at Atlantis one more time but the grounder warrior doesn’t lift her gaze, and Raven’s mind is spinning with confusion.

**

Two days later Clarke is in the valley, much to her and the other’s surprise Atlantis was indeed right, and the houses have survived the years that went by after the second nuclear apocalypse. Raven theorizes that it’s probably a result of the geography of the place combined with a micro special environment that protected the place from the radiation, much like it did in the other valley, she can’t really be sure, but the truth is that nature flourished as before. The group has undoubtedly a lot of work to do but everyone in the small group that traveled with Clarke is sure that they will be able to fix everything they will need to make the valley a peaceful home. Raven and Miller have been discussing what the urgent tasks to do are, winter is bound to come soon, and the primary goal is to make the houses survivable with enough comfort in the harsh winter, Echo has told them that Azgeda was the coldest place amongst Lexa’s lands but that doesn’t mean that the other villages weren’t fustigated by cold temperatures either. And so as they stay in the village and make plans everyone agrees that the most important goals are to fix the cabins they will live in and have a place to have a large stock of wood.

Clarke is now sitting on a fallen tree and she's sketching what she sees and what she envisions for the place. The sound of steps stopping next to her makes Clarke look up to see Raven look at her with a sort of pensive expression.

_“Can I sit with you?”_

_“Of course you can Raven.”_

The blonde says with a smile and Raven sits down with a sigh stretching her leg.

_“What’s wrong?”_

The blonde asks at Raven’s silence and the woman sighs again and shrugs as Clarke looks at her with a frown and Raven looks at the horizon.

_“Do you think we can be happy here?”_

_“I’m sure we can, this village is perfect it might not be the colorful valley I once loved but if you and Miller are right and we bring all the stuff you listed we’re going to be able to have energy in some places and settle in. We will have a warm, sturdy shelter and where to get food and water. Plus, do you know Atlantis wants to farm?”_

Clarke asks with a smile and Raven looks at her with surprise in her eyes, she hasn’t been able to stop thinking about the fact that Atlantis kissed her.

_“She kissed me.”_

Raven says in a small voice and Clarke looks at her with a smile that soon after turns into a little smirk.

_“Oh! I can’t say I’m surprised; she’s been looking at you as if you hung the stars in the sky.”_

_“What? No, she doesn’t, besides you two seem pretty close too.”_

The Latina says a bit sharper than intended and Clarke shakes her head and starts laughing and honestly for some reason is the most genuine laugh she has had in a long time. Raven just looks at her puzzled and waiting for the blonde to calm down a little.

_“What’s so funny about this?”_

_“You can’t be serious right now! Raven, for a genius you can be pretty dense. Atlantis as much as she is a really good and unexpected friend that’s all it is, she only has eyes for you.”_

_“I don’t know Clarke, this, after all we went through, I never thought I would or even could like someone else again and it all seems so sudden a couple of weeks ago I didn’t even know her.”_

Raven says somberly and Clarke looks at her carefully, the sun is now setting, and the group needs to eat something before going to sleep. They need to rest properly to make the best of their days in the valley.

_“Is it because she’s a girl?”_

Clarke asks slowly, for her liking girls or boys was just natural, she never questioned it, and judging by her time with Lexa at Polis she has a feeling that the grounders didn’t have issues with it either, and although on the Ark some people didn’t feel the same way, some weren’t as open about love and sexuality Clarke never thought Raven would have any issues with it. The Latina seems to be taking Clarke’s words in as she looks at the sunset and takes a deep breath.

_“No, I mean I always saw sexuality as something fluid, I just never had the time to think about it, on the Ark I had Finn and he was all I had and when shit happened, and we ended up here something was always happening. I think with Luna I realized that I could be attracted to women too but that was a long time ago.”_

The Latina says sadly and Clarke nods casting her eyes on the horizon as a moment of silence settles between them, their actions clouding their minds for a moment, eventually Clarke looks at Raven and smiles softly at her.

_“Well now you have all the time you need to figure yourself out, just please be careful with yourself and Atlantis, we know what she has been through and I would appreciate it if my two friends didn’t end up heartbroken.”_

Clarke says as the wind blows past them and the blonde shivers, Raven looks at her and nods as she stands and offers one hand for Clarke to take.

_“Let’s go, I’m sure Miller already has a nice fire waiting for us.”_

**

It has been almost a week since Clarke and the others left and Atlantis is growing restless, it’s not like she is worried per se, after all, there’s no one else in the world besides them and they live in peace, but she is still recovering and Niylah has been keeping an eye on her like a hawk. The woman and Jackson had been stopping Atlantis from doing any heavy tasks and they only allowed her to walk outside to enjoy the sun and nothing more. Atlantis was never one to sit still though, even in the bunker she was always watching over the people, calming her people down when needed be and stopping the youngest ones from rebelling against Octavia and Indra, unknowingly to the rest of the group Atlantis was always in the shadows being a peacemaker.

The grounder warrior sighs as she watches the sun while sitting on a chair doing nothing. Tired of just sitting outside while everyone seems to be doing something Atlantis sighs and stands up, looking around with a sigh and wrapping the blanket around her shoulders she starts walking away. Niylah notices her movements and smiles kindly at her making a move towards her to help her but Atlantis shakes her head with a smile, she feels like she doesn’t need as much help as before, more than a week has passed since her injury and she doesn't feel pain anymore when she stands and walks, as long as she is careful and doesn't make any sudden movements she can pretty much be on her own. Jackson has already started to remove some of the stitches and the worst feeling Atlantis has experienced in the last two days is an itchy sensation in the place where her wounds are turning into pink scars.

As the woman walks inside the structure, she doesn't hear the sound of the rover’s engine and therefore she doesn't look back when the vehicle rides through Arkadia's grounds and stops. Raven climbs out of the vehicle and looks around with a frown. Niylah is the first one to notice their arrival and walks quickly in their direction smiling when Echo grabs her hand and squeezes it.

_“How did it go?”_

_“Well, we have some work to do but I think it is amazing!”_

Echo says with a smile and Niylah smiles too squeezing the woman’s hand in return. Then Niylah looks at the others and smiles knowingly.

_"If you're looking for Atlantis she just went to her room, she must be missing you because she's been sulking since you guys left."_

The woman says, noticing how Raven looks around as if searching from something, the Latina looks at her and nods. After grabbing her backpack Raven looks at Clarke.

_"You know what we need, tell the others about our lists so we can start delegating tasks, I'm going to check on Atlantis and I'll join you after."_

Raven says and Clarke smiles with a soft nod as they start to make the preparations they need.

**

Raven stops at the bedroom door and takes a deep breath; she had missed Atlantis more than she thought she would in a short period and that alongside her conversation with Clarke from a few days ago propels her to open the door softly to not awake Atlantis in case she's already sleeping.

As Raven walks into the room, she sees the woman looking at the ceiling with a soft pensive expression. The Latina smiles and she walks further forward, taking off her boots she sits on the bed and leans back much like Atlantis is doing. Their shoulders touch slightly but Atlantis remains silent swallowing down the lump in her throat and Raven looks at her with a frown.

_"I thought you would be happier to know I'm back, someone mentioned that you've been sulking for days."_

Raven says in a careful tone of voice and Atlantis looks at her out of the corners of her eyes and sighs.

_"I kissed you."_

The woman says and Raven nods as she turns around to face the woman.

_"You did."_

_"I shouldn't have done it without your permission. I'm… I'm sorry, it was rude of me."_

The woman says in a small voice and Raven's eyes soften at the woman's demeanor. Although consent is important Raven can honestly say that she never even thought about it in a bad light. She was just surprised by the kiss.

_"Is that why you've been sulking since we left?"_

_"I don't sulk."_

The woman says with a frown that Raven realizes she finds endearing but before she can say something Atlantis is speaking again.

_"I am sorry for making you feel uncomfortable. You have been nothing but kind to me and I overstepped. I'm not good at this."_

The woman says still not meeting Raven's eyes, moving her hand aimlessly between them and Raven smiles cradling Atlantis' face with her right hand and rubbing her thumb over the soft skin.

_"I… I didn't kiss you back…"_

_"You didn't and you have every right to be mad at me."_

Atlantis says cutting off Raven's words and trying to avert her gaze, but the Latina just smiles, her hand keeping Atlantis' face angled towards her own.

_"I'm not mad, I was just surprised."_

_"You're not upset?"_

Atlantis asks not hiding her skepticism and Raven instead of replying to the woman leans in closer and kisses Atlantis softly, the grounder warrior is surprised for a moment and remains still but then Raven's lips are moving again urging her to respond to the kiss and Atlantis surrenders to her feelings.

They kiss softly and gently, taking their time to mold their lips to each other’s, to discover each other on a completely different level. Raven's tongue is warm and soft, and Atlantis makes a soft noise when their tongues dance together. When they break the kiss to breathe Raven leans her forehead against Atlantis's and smiles.

_"I think I will like it very much if you kiss me again as many times as you want."_

The Latina says and Atlantis opens her eyes to look at the woman in front of her.

_“You’re sure?”_

Atlantis asks softly because she has to, her feelings for Raven are new, and although she is confident in what she feels she needs to be sure that Raven is on the same page.

_“I’m certain.”_

_"Okay."_

Atlantis says with a soft and tender smile and Raven smiles back too and kisses her again. As Raven kisses Atlantis she can’t help but notice her small gestures, the way Atlantis sighs and smiles sometimes as if in disbelief with what is happening. Even if she’s in disbelief, the way she kisses Raven, the way she tugs her closer molding their bodies together it shows some confidence. Atlantis is not new to this, she touches lightly but in the right places, she must have been with women before, and that assuages Raven for some odd reason, the Latina can’t deny how curious she feels about what they might do if they keep kissing like this, the grounder warrior must be a tender and caring lover and a rush of need crashes down on Raven as she realizes that she wants to be closer to Atlantis, she needs her touch. However, she’s still only now coming to terms that she does have strong feelings for Atlantis, she didn’t tell Clarke before but she’s scared and because of that she stops and pulls back slight, kissing the other woman’s nose and waits for Atlantis to open her eyes.

_“Let’s go, we have much to discuss.”_

Raven says as she stands from the bed and moves as if to help Atlantis to stand too and the woman shakes her head slightly and smiles.

_“Jackson has been taking my stitches out gradually, but I can walk by myself now.”_

Atlantis says with a soft proud and relieved smile and Raven smiles too but still helps her much to the woman’s exasperation, noticing the woman’s annoyance Raven chuckles and kisses her one more time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, we can all say now that Atlantis is my baby and I will protect her with my life!  
> So what do you guys think?  
> What is this being looking for?


	6. White mornings and surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!   
> How are you all? I hope everyone is doing okay!  
> We have a new chapter and as you noticed that also means we're coming to an end with just another chapter to go!  
> This was always meant to be a short fic, born of my need for closure that has I said at the start might not make much sense at times, this is the chapter where all my doubts about making sense came to life. But, honestly, the show had some many things that didn't make much sense either that I just went with it.  
> I'm sorry if the plot turns out to be different from what you were expecting but I do hope that by the end of this chapter some of you are happy with it!  
> As usual kudos and comments are highly appreciated!

**Chapter 6 – White mornings and surprises**

Two months later the group has happily settled in the village Atlantis mentioned, autumn has stepped aside and now the cold winter days are definitely upon them. Although the weather is relentless, the days seem shorter and the nights are cold and long. The group is happy and at peace. Emori, Jordan, Levitt, and Raven have been working nonstop to make everyone’s lives comfortable and although they have faced obstacles all the technology they gathered from Sanctum, Arkadia and the bunker has been a great asset for their plans. Levitt had also thought of going back to Bardo and retrieve all the equipment they thought was useful which was greatly appreciated by Raven and Emori.

The priority was the cabins, fixing doors and windows, and making the places their cozy homes. And for the last two months, that’s what the group has been doing, the weather is not perfect for renovations so they have decided to do what they could and do the major renovations when the seasons change again. Although they could have easily just planned on fixing enough houses for them, they are planning on repairing more cabins and making the most of the place. Atlantis had proven to be a useful addition and along with Gaia and Indra, they had taught the others how to use herbs and how to create paint from pigments. Atlantis’ has a little more knowledge than the other two grounders and she taught Jackson how to make medicine and how to know which herbs to pick, Murphy with Niylah’s help had started to learn how to use herbs to make the food taste better and they are now discovering in old books how to preserve food for long periods.

Octavia and Hope already know how to farm and Atlantis is joining them enjoying the love of labor that comes with the hard work of farming and Jordan is making plans for a greenhouse that will allow them to have some seasonal fruits and veggies. Not everything is perfect though and two months later Raven is still battling with the obstacles of creating enough energy to have electricity in the cabins, but luckily enough for them, the weather has allowed them to have a warehouse with enough wood to last the winter. As they previously assessed all the cabins have a nice and cozy fireplace and they made sure to have a stock of wood in case it rains, and they can’t fetch more from the woodhouse. Emori has cleverly thought of a mechanism that makes the warmth spread across the cabins.

The windows are now covered by colorful curtains and even though Raven is still trying to figure out how to channel and use the energy that the wind can provide, the sun’s energy has been enough to place some lights on the outside of the cabins.

Echo and Niylah have one of the far cabins and by now everyone knows that they are a couple living together. Octavia and Levitt are closer than before, and the man now knows a lot more about the planet earth and Octavia’s life before. Hope and Jordan had chosen to stay together too, and no one was surprised by it. Indra and Gaia after mending their relationship decided to live together too. Atlantis had picked a cabin for herself and soon after Raven was spending more time in Atlantis’s home than in her own house, Emori and Murphy decided to stay closer to Clarke and their cabin is next to the blonde’s. While Jackson and Miller have a cabin next to the doctor’s workshop, although they live in peace sometimes people get injuries from work and Jackson wanted to have a proper place to attend them.

Clarke although sometimes she feels alone is at ease, Picasso keeps her company, and more often than not the dog climbs onto the bed and sleeps by Clarke’s feet. The blonde woman often craves for a human touch, Lexa or the higher being never returned and when Clarke feels like crying, missing her greatest love she takes comfort in the fact that everyone is happy, and Picasso is a constant company as if Madi had left the dog as a gift for her.

**

Another week goes by and everyone seems to be as happy as ever or better yet, happier than ever before. Although the weather is rough, and the winter is cold the group still find things to keep themselves busy with and on the days where the rain and wind doesn’t let them do much other than hang around in each other’s places, they play games and plan the days ahead.

After a long day of carrying wood and making sure everyone has enough food to last for a few days, Clarke walks towards her house and smiles. After lighting some candles, the blonde takes in the smell of burning wood in the fireplace and the perfume of her cozy cabin. The space is not excessively big, but it has everything she needs and the blonde always feels at ease after a long day when she finally has a chance to rest. As Clarke climbs onto the bed, she grabs her sketchbook and writes a few sentences about her day, the woman likes to detail what the group has done, it feels silly at times, the human race will end with them but the blonde still finds comfort in sharing her thoughts with the blank pages.

_“You said you didn’t want to be alone; your friends are back and yet you still feel alone.”_

The voice says and it almost startles Clarke as she looks over to the fireplace to see Lexa standing there with a soft expression, the bright flames casting an orange glow over the woman still wearing the same war-paint that Clarke always associated with Heda.

_“We are humans, and we feel things even when we know we shouldn’t.”_

Clarke replies earnestly and the being looks at her with a nod.

_“Such a complex species, all these emotions that drove you to do unspeakable things, all these feelings, and yet when we offered peace you still fought it, you still decided to come back.”_

_“I didn’t think I would see you again.”_

Clarke says as she places her sketchbook on the bedside table and moves from the bed as Lexa walks over to look through the windows to the night outside.

_“I wasn’t supposed to come back, but there are things that even we couldn’t foresee. Things that made such an impact on our peaceful existence that lead me to have questions and doubts. You have shown us, me, that we might not always be fair in our judgment.”_

_“I thought you had all the answers you were seeking.”_

Clarke says and Lexa turns to her, there’s something different about the higher being, some familiarity in the way she looks, and Clarke thinks that maybe it’s because of their previous conversations, but these higher beings are still a mystery to her and she’s not sure if she wants to fully understand them.

_“We usually don’t allow second chances.”_

_“Oh, I’m aware, look what happened to the Bardonians, how you erased an entire species because one single subject failed the test is quite the indicator of that.”_

_“You don’t agree with the way the test is made.”_

The being states simply and Clarke has the feeling that her defiance makes this being more amused than they show.

_“I think everyone should be judged on their own merits and not the other way around, to place the entire fate of a species on a single person doesn’t seem fair to me.”_

_“I know, and perhaps you’re right, when you failed your test you had your friends ready to show us that even with all the knowledge we possess injustices can be made.”_

_“Are you here to tell me that we can still transcend if we want to?”_

Clarke asks with a raised eyebrow, she has a feeling that something is happening, something has changed.

_“No, your friends made a choice but even so, they don’t seem to care or regret it, and even though you failed your test we’re going to allow you a second chance too.”_

_“What does that mean?”_

_“It means that you won’t see me again, it wasn’t an easy decision, but it comes with a price, from now on you won’t be able to use the stones.”_

The being says and Clarke looks at her, Lexa just smiles and looks over her shoulder to the bed.

_“You should rest now, you’re tired.”_

The being says and Clarke frowns, for a split second she looks at her cozy and inviting bed and thinks how good it would be to share it with another human body, a warm living being that would be real when Clarke’s dreams aren’t. When Clarke looks at the place where the being was Lexa isn’t there anymore. With a sinking feeling and a puzzled mind, Clarke goes around the house blowing the candles out and putting more wood on the fire to keep the place warm for the night.

**

Raven wakes up with a shiver and rolls over in bed with a groan, by now she’s not surprised anymore with the fact that Atlantis stole the blankets during the night, it has been a common occurrence during some nights, when Raven drifts away from the woman’s body in the large bed they share the grounder pulls almost all the blankets over herself leaving Raven’s torso almost exposed.

The Latina looks around and can see that the day is already beginning, the sky outside is light blue but the sound of the wind lets her know that it is cold outside. With an evil grin, Raven crawls closer to her lover and places her cold hands on the woman’s warm body, sneaking them underneath the woman’s clothes as Atlantis gasps.

_“Fuck you’re cold!”_

The woman complains and Raven smiles, it’s rare to hear the grounder cursing and the Latina just presses her hands further onto the woman’s warm skin.

_“Yeah, that’s maybe because my girlfriend is a blanket thief.”_

Raven says as Atlantis tries to move away from her wandering hands, but Raven just giggles and keeps her in place throwing one leg over the woman’s ones. Atlantis sighs and turns around to look at Raven, she is never going to get used to being called girlfriend, but every time Raven says the word a fluttering feeling takes over her chest and she melts a little more.

_“Stop, you’re tickling me.”_

Atlantis says with a smile as Raven grazes her fingertips over the woman’s skin, she can still feel the woman’s scars, and although she is now fully healed the scars will always be a reminder of her bravery and what she was willing to do to save Raven.

_“Who would have known that the great grounder warrior Atlantis would not only be a blanket thief but also ticklish?”_

Raven says with a smile and Atlantis nuzzles her nose into the Latina’s neck, they both shiver, and Raven sighs at the intimacy that she now has with the woman. It wasn’t always like this, the first time they were together Raven was quite unsure of what to do, but Atlantis was patient and caring and she is just a gentle lover as she is a gentle person.

_“Maybe if you didn’t get too hot during the night and move away from me, I wouldn’t feel the need to pull the blankets closer to myself.”_

The woman says as she kisses Raven’s neck and the Latina smiles, it’s not her fault that the blood of her ancestors runs hot in her veins even in the coldest of nights, she knows that Atlantis does have a point, but she shakes her head nonetheless.

_“Fine you might not be entirely wrong there.”_

Raven says and Atlantis nods smugly and places a kiss on the Latina’s nose.

_“What do you want to do today?”_

Atlantis asks as she always does and Raven smiles, they always talk about what they will do for the day, if Raven needs help Atlantis always makes sure she’s around to do whatever she can. As the wind whistles loudly outside Raven ponders for a moment and smiles mischievously.

_“What if we stay in bed all day?”_

The Latina asks kissing Atlantis’s lips as if to convince her and the grounder woman smiles as she places one hand on Raven’s waist.

_“That sounds like a perfect plan.”_

Atlantis says at the same time a loud thud startles them and Raven frowns looking at the door. Atlantis is up on her feet within seconds and she grabs a knife as she approaches one of the windows and looks outside with a gasp. Raven follows her at a slower pace making sure to adjust her brace and when she looks out the window she smiles in surprise.

_“It’s snowing.”_

The woman says and Atlantis looks at her with a soft expression.

_“We should go outside and make sure everyone has enough wood.”_

_“What? No way, it’s far too cold and we know that everyone has enough wood we restocked yesterday.”_

_“Is Raven Reyes afraid of the snow?”_

Atlantis asks teasingly as she places the knife on the windowsill and pulls Raven closer for a kiss, Raven kisses her but then pulls back slightly.

_“The last time I was in the snow it wasn’t exactly a pleasant experience.”_

The Latina says and Atlantis nods, Raven has talked about when she, Clarke, and some of the others had left Sanctum to look for their people and ended up on a snow-covered planet, another thud on their door makes Atlantis look outside and she smiles.

_“Yeah, but last time you didn’t have Murphy challenging you to a snowball fight.”_

The grounder warrior says as Raven looks through the window to see Murphy and Emori laughing in the snow. Not one to back down from a challenge Raven smiles and kisses Atlantis one more time before changing to warmer clothes and stepping outside of the cabin.

**

Clarke wakes up to the sound of laughter coming from the outside of her door, the blonde frowns slightly as the sound echoes through the house, considering that the house is just one large open space it doesn't surprise her that the sound drifts to her so easily. But as she blinks and pays attention to the voices, she can hear Raven’s and Murphy's voices loudly.

The banter she can hear deepens her curiosity and the blonde woman sits up in bed and looks for her clothes. It takes a while for Clarke to get dressed and ready to go out and when she does, she opens her door to see Murphy throwing a snowball at Raven.

As the blonde walks out of her house she immediately feels the harsh wind on her face, the skies are clear blue, but the temperature has dropped a few degrees during the night. A few meters away Murphy and Raven are engrossed in a snowball fight as Miller and Jackson take sides and Emori laughs. Clarke scans the scene with sparkling blue eyes and smiles when she sees Echo and Niylah hugging at the entrance of their cabin too.

Octavia and Levitt are laughing as the shorter girl drags him towards the fight, the awe Levitt is feeling quickly replaced by a mischievous grin when Hope throws a snowball at his back, and soon after Jordan is laughing at them only to get hit by a snowball in his face. Clarke chuckles and shakes her head as she urges Picasso to go outside and chase everyone while barking and wagging her tail happily.

_"Is quite pretty, isn’t it?"_

Atlantis says as she walks towards Clarke with a soft smile on her face, her rosy cheeks a sign that the woman has been outside for longer than Clarke, and the blonde looks around. The village is engraved in the base of a mountain, but Clarke can see that her cabin stands a little higher than the ones at the other end. The ground is covered with a thick blanket of white snow, Clarke has noticed that her boots had dug into it softly and although the blonde has been on a snowed covered planet, she can't deny that right now the view in front of her is as beautiful as the old movies she used to see on the Ark with her parents when she was a kid.

The rooftops of the cabins are covered in white and the chimneys are casting smoke while keeping the houses warm and cozy for when its inhabitants decide to go back inside. The trees are covered in snow and as the wind blows small snowflakes fall from them. A sense of peacefulness envelopes the blonde as she looks at Atlantis with a smile.

_"It's beautiful."_

The woman says as she files the images to draw later on. Atlantis smiles again and nods as the rest of the group walk away, descending what could have been described as a street dividing the village in two. Clarke starts walking in the opposite direction with the grounder warrior. Atlantis seems to always be paying attention to Clarke, a silent companion for when the blonde needs some quiet time but doesn't want to be completely alone with her thoughts. Even though she sometimes enjoys the solitude of her new life on earth she's always grateful for Atlantis' comfortable presence.

They walk side by side in silence, but it doesn't last long because Clarke is then hit by a snowball on her back and turns around to see Raven laughing and jogging in their direction.

_"Where are you two going in this weather?"_

The Latina asks with a frown and Clarke looks at Atlantis and then at Raven.

_"Nowhere in particular."_

The blonde says and Raven chuckles mischievously as she throws another ball at Clarke and the blonde groans but smiles. Before she knows it, she's engaged in a war with Raven, fighting on the floor as they laugh openly at their silliness. Atlantis watches with a fond smile as Clarke rolls on the floor and starts to move her arms and legs making a snow angel chuckling loudly despite herself.

While Clarke and Raven give in in their childhood fantasies of playing in the snow, a snapping sound of cracking branches is heard and Atlantis immediately stands between the two women and the direction of the sound, her hand instinctively grabs the dagger she still carries at her waist and she looks ahead squinting her eyes in concentration. Despite everything she has seen in her life nothing would prepare her for what she is seeing now. A woman is carefully walking through the forest, her clothes drenched with melted snow as she looks around as if looking for something.

_"Lexa?"_

Atlantis says with a gasp and behind her Clarke immediately stops and stands. As the blonde looks ahead to where Atlantis is also looking, her heart stops and seems to sink to her feet before coming up and getting stuck in the blonde's throat.

_"You can see her?"_

Clarke asks gulping down the lump in her throat, after so many times of seeing the higher being the blonde isn't sure of what to think. Raven stands up looking puzzled for a moment at Clarke's words and she scoffs.

_"Of course she can see her; she's right there."_

Raven says as Clarke looks from her friend to Lexa again, she kind of expected the being to have vanished in those short seconds but instead, Lexa is walking in their direction, her face bare of her war-paint and Clarke can't help but think and hope that this is indeed her Lexa. The blonde all but runs towards her as Lexa smiles and holds her tight in her arms.

_"Is it really you?"_

The blonde asks in a small voice as she cradles Lexa's cold face in her hands and the brunette smiles and nods.

_"How? How's this even possible?"_

The blonde asks as tears form in her eyes and roll down her face. Lexa doesn't even have time to answer, Clarke kisses her softly and slowly as if she's afraid the woman will disappear if she doesn't.

_"I told you I would always be with you Clarke; it took me a while but I'm here to stay. We don't owe our people anything anymore."_

The brunette says earnestly as she looks into Clarke's blue eyes, blue and green meet once more, the sky and the ground finally together at peace.

_"You must be freezing."_

Atlantis says simply as she walks towards them and Lexa looks at her. Even though nothing makes sense Atlantis has stopped questioning the world's strange ways.

_"Atlantis? I didn't think I would see you again."_

Lexa says as Atlantis smiles and when Clarke steps back slightly the woman hugs her friend, and surprisingly Lexa hugs her back with a sigh of relief and affection.

_"Let's go, Clarke, let's get her to someplace warmer."_

Raven says when Atlantis steps back with tears in her eyes and Lexa looks softly at Clarke, the blonde immediately takes her hand afraid that if she doesn't touch Lexa, if she doesn't root her to this dimension, she will fade away.

**

As soon as Clarke and the other women arrive back at the village everyone stops and stares at them, Echo visibly gasps as Gaia and Indra look like they are seeing a ghost. Indra is the first one to move in Lexa’s direction with a doubtful look on her face, the woman has learned through the years that her beliefs weren’t always accurate, and yet if someone had told her that Lexa would be back even though the flame was destroyed, she wouldn’t believe it for a second.

_“Heda?”_

The woman asks and even after all this time her voice still carries the same reverent tone from before. Lexa stops and looks at her, her face is soft, there’s no longer any reason to put her façade up and she smiles.

_“It’s just Lexa now Indra, I’m one of you.”_

The woman replies simply and Indra although still shaken nods. Clarke can see that everyone wants to approach and ask questions; Clarke herself wants to make sense of what’s happening. But is it really important? Lexa is back, Clarke can feel her hand getting warmer in her own, she can touch her and kiss her and god does she want to kiss her.

_“I think we should give them some time.”_

Raven says coming to the blonde’s rescue and Clarke smiles thankfully at her. As they resume their walk and the others decide to go into their homes after a morning in the snow Clarke looks over her shoulder and notices the quizzical looks, she knows without a doubt that the next few days will be filled with questions. For now, she nods at Atlantis and Raven and pulls Lexa with her as Picasso barks and jumps happily.

_“Hey Picasso, come here girl.”_

Atlantis calls when Lexa stops and looks dubiously at the dog, Clarke watches as Picasso runs towards Atlantis and she kneels to pat the friendly dog, Raven shares a knowing look with Clarke, and the blonde chuckles at Lexa’s surprised face.

_“Who would have thought those two would become friends.”_

The blonde says with a shake of her head as Lexa looks from Atlantis to Clarke with a frown and the blonde just tugs her hand harder in urgency.

_“Where are we going?”_

Lexa asks as she looks around trying to make sense of where she is and Clarke looks at her, for a moment the blonde wonders if Lexa is aware of everything that has happened. There’s so much she doesn’t know about and maybe Lexa doesn’t know either. What happened to her? How is it possible for her to be here? Does she know about Bardo and Sanctum? As if sensing Clarke’s doubts Lexa looks at her and smiles.

_“We have all the time in the world to talk and try to make sense of what’s happening.”_

_“I know, but for now I have a warm house and a fireplace where you can get warm and change.”_

Clarke says with a smile of her own and she can’t put into words what she feels right now, the happiness of having Lexa back, her Lexa, her greatest love.

**

As soon as Clarke opens the door, she feels warm and at ease, the fire is almost ambers now but the blonde quickly pokes at it and adds more wood. The scent of burning wood permeates the place and Clarke feels truly at home when she urges Lexa inside and takes off her coat and places it on a chair next to the fireplace to dry. The blonde woman walks over to Lexa again, the brunette remains silent as she looks intently at her, a tear rolls down her face when Clarke comes closer, much like it did the last time they were together in Polis, the day when Clarke pulled her walls down and Lexa’s too and they surrendered to their love.

As if both of them are remembering the same thing Lexa takes a tentative step closer and cradles Clarke’s face in both her hands. Time seems to stop when the brunette leans down slightly to graze her lips over Clarke’s ones and the blonde sighs as she closes her eyes and kisses Lexa with all the want she suppressed over years of not having her.

_“I never told you that I love you back.”_

Lexa says gently as she pulls back slightly and Clarke’s eyes open to a forest of deep green in front of her, she inhales deeply and grabs Lexa’s hands in her own, leading her towards the bed. The urgency of the moment taking over anything that they might have to talk or say, in this moment all it matters is that Clarke is slowly undressing Lexa, the brunette is shivering either with emotion or cold Clarke can’t say but whatever it is she knows she wants to stop it and that the best way to do so is to press her warm naked body to Lexa’s cold one.

As Clarke crawls in bed on top of Lexa she can feel the woman’s temperature already rising, Lexa watches with a hungry expression as Clarke places herself fully on top of her, the touch of the naked body against naked body sparkling their desire to life, warm breasts grazing against equally warm skin and spreading heat as hands wander over soft skin and they both whimper. Clarke’s hands are gentle on Lexa’s skin and the brunette rakes her nails over the woman’s back as they kiss and whisper sweet nothings to each other. They take it slow; Clarke takes her time to rediscover Lexa’s toned body, her lips trail over olive skin as Lexa moans and whimpers loudly whenever Clarke’s lips suck and her teeth bite softly, the blonde’s tongue is even better than Lexa remembers it. And when Clarke travels south and takes one round hard nipple in her mouth Lexa is lost, lost to the world outside, a world she will help rebuild as long as she’s alive, but that can wait because now Lexa wants nothing more than to feel the passion, the love and the desire in Clarke’s touches.

Clarke takes her time to kiss the woman’s breasts and travel south, she stops at the woman’s abdomen, there’s no scar there and Clarke almost wishes Lexa had one just so she could worship it with the love and affection she feels. Not dwelling much on it, Clarke continues in her exploration, Lexa’s hands are now tangled in Clarke’s hair and she moves in sync with Clarke letting her taste every little spot of skin the blonde deems right. When Clarke finally reaches her destination, she looks up to find Lexa biting her bottom lip with her eyes closed, the blonde smiles and spreads Lexa’s legs wider kissing her inner thighs and pressing her thumb over the woman’s clit.

_“God.”_

Lexa moans as she feels the pressure building up in the pit of her stomach and growing in anticipation, at the first lick of Clarke’s velvet tongue and Lexa all but squirms under her touch. Her body seems to combust at the feeling and Clarke tastes her lover with newfound curiosity. Does Lexa still taste the same? Does she still make the small cries in the back of her throat? Clarke wants to learn it all; she needs to know it all over again.

_“Oh my god, Clarke, please.”_

The brunette begs as Clarke sucks at her clit and is rewarded not only with Lexa’s pleading words but also her nails scraping at the blonde’s scalp urging her to continue. And Clarke does, she sucks Lexa’s clit again as the woman tries to seek even more friction by lifting her pelvis, Clarke twirls her tongue around the swollen nerve and Lexa cries in pleasure. With Lexa’s legs over her shoulders and her face buried in between the brunette’s legs, Clarke moves one hand to pin her in place as the other spreads Lexa’s labia, the light coming through the windows gives Clarke a chance to see how Lexa’s center is glistening with arousal. Clarke’s movements start slow, and she licks the full extent of Lexa’s slick folds, and the woman gasps.

Reaching blindly Clarke grabs one of Lexa’s hands and laces their fingers as she takes the woman’s clit in her mouth again. She sucks at the same time her tongue presses as hard as she can and Lexa’s eyes are tight shut, and all decorum is lost when the blonde’s fingers trace patterns in Lexa’s center.

_“Fuck. Gosh, fuck.”_

The brunette says as Clarke pushes one finger inside curling it and feeling Lexa’s walls clenching around it. The blonde moans as she feels Lexa’s body move closer to the edge, her finger thrusting as deep as she can and her relentless mouth sucking the swollen nerve. Lexa can feel herself at the brink of a precipice and with each suck and thrust, she moves closer and closer to the edge. Clarke is right there to catch her though and she makes a point of showing it by squeezing the brunette’s hand in her own as the other palms her clit when her finger curls inside and Clarke lifts her head to look at Lexa who’s eyes remain tightly shut. The brunette’s body spasms as she arches her back; curling her toes as a wave of pleasure comes crashing down on her from the pit of her stomach to her center. For a moment it feels like all her blood had drained from her body apart from the pulsating feeling between her legs that Clarke is now soothing with slower movements.

As Clarke coaxes Lexa down from her blissful high she moves up in the bed and kisses the brunette, it’s sloppy and messy as Lexa’s body feels like jelly and she sighs into Clarke’s lips tasting herself on the blonde’s tongue. Clarke pulls back slightly to look at Lexa, to make sure she’s really there and this isn’t one of her dreams that makes her gasp awake in the middle of the night. Lexa as if sensing Clarke’s doubts gently traces her fingers over the woman’s face softly pulling a strand of stray hair behind the woman’s ear and grounding her to reality.

_“I missed you so much.”_

Clarke says earnestly as she snuggles up closer to Lexa’s sweat body, soaking in the woman’s comfort, this truly feels like home, Lexa’s arms around her, Lexa’s plump lips kissing her temple with tender care while humming soothingly.

_“I know and I’m sorry for everything you went through Clarke.”_

Lexa says, her voice is soft but her words serious and Clarke pulls back to look at her, and she can see how genuine the brunette’s words are. A moment in silence passes by as Clarke locks her gaze with Lexa’s, it almost seems like Lexa knows everything that happened. The blonde’s fingertips are now trailing over the woman’s tattoo on her bicep as her chest is pressed to Lexa’s one.

_“Do you… do you know what happened… since…”_

_“Shh, we don’t have to talk about it now.”_

Lexa says as she runs her thumb over Clarke’s lips and Clarke smiles at her as one of her fingertips moves along Lexa’s arm.

_“It’s just, so much happened Lexa…”_

_“Can we talk about something else?”_

The brunette asks and something feels reminiscent of their time together in Lexa’s bed in Polis, Clarke smiles and leans in closer.

_“We don’t have to talk at all.”_

The blonde says pulling a smiling Lexa on top of her as their hands intertwine and Lexa kisses her deeply. They will have to talk about it eventually, but for now, neither of them is in a rush, there are no wars to fight or to stop, no one to be saved and all Clarke and Lexa want is to just be themselves in the privacy of Clarke’s home that now is also Lexa’s home.

**

_“Raven, will you stop pacing, you’re making Picasso feel antsy.”_

Atlantis says from the old couch she restored and put in front of the fireplace, she has her back to the crackling fire as she follows Raven’s movements in the space of their living room.

_“I just… Lexa is back, Atlantis! How is that even possible?”_

The Latina asks as she stops and looks at Picasso, the dog is looking at her strangely and Raven sighs as she pets the dog on the head.

_“I’m sorry buddy; I’m going to sit down okay?”_

Raven says as she walks over to the couch and sits down next to Atlantis who immediately pulls her in so Raven can snuggle with her. Raven goes willingly with a sigh, the calming presence of the grounder warrior soothing Raven's fast overworking mind.

_"Better?"_

The woman asks and Raven replies with a humming sound as she leans her head in the crock of Atlantis' neck basking in the warm embrace of the other woman and circles her arms around the woman’s waist.

_"I just don't understand how this is possible?"_

Raven says and Atlantis nods, the Latina feels the movement and they stay silent for a few seconds.

_"Does it matter now?"_

Atlantis’s voice is small, and Raven can tell her simple way of looking at life is telling her to just accept the fact that Lexa is back regardless of what happened and be happy and thankful for it. But if Atlantis' mind doesn't question it, Raven's one will overthink for the two of them.

_"It doesn't make sense."_

The woman says and Atlantis’s arms tighten around her torso as she pulls Raven closer to her chest and drops her chin on top of the other woman's head.

_"Didn't you say that the flame would protect itself?"_

At Atlantis’s words, Raven closes her eyes and thinks about Becca's diaries and everything the woman had made notes of, and then she nods.

_"Becca wrote a code so the AI would always have a back door."_

The woman says and then turns a little pulling back slightly to look perplexed at Atlantis and grinning.

_"You're a genius."_

The woman says and Atlantis shakes her head slightly, she is now more than used to Raven's mind, since she joined the group, she had seen Raven putting things together, frowning deep in thought as if she was working on a puzzle, however, her mind still doesn't catch up with most of the things Raven says. More often than not the grounder warrior just listens to Raven, the woman usually babbles on about something that Atlantis never saw working before, let alone know what it is.

_"We thought that maybe the flame would protect itself within the chip. But what if it was something completely different?"_

Raven says lost in thought as Atlantis looks at her with a confused expression, sometimes she still feels like she's no match for Raven's genius brain, her train of thoughts too fast and complex for the woman to keep track of. But the Latina always makes sure to show Atlantis that she sees her as her equal, her partner for years to come, her safe harbor. The Latina smiles as she snuggles up against her lover's body soaking up her warm and comforting scent.

_"Clarke saw Lexa in the city of light, which means she was alive, her mind was alive, maybe, in the same way, Sheidheda found how to go to Russell's mind drive, Lexa found a place in Madi's consciousness? We know two minds can't coexist in the same space, but Madi still had the code to unleash the test even though it wasn’t her memory, even if she didn’t have the flame."_

Raven explains putting together the puzzle, but Atlantis is still trying to make sense of what the Latina is saying.

_"But how?"_

_"We have more potential in our minds than we really use sometimes, although we know that we use more than ten percent and that number was a myth, still some people thought that we don’t use our brains in full capacity, maybe Lexa's mind was dormant in a way, hiding in a sublevel of Madi’s own conscious and that's why after the flame was removed Madi was fine, Lexa's mind was there somewhere and when Cadogan…"_

Raven trails off and shudders at the thought, she doesn't want to relive Clarke's angst upon finding her daughter alive but in a dead body.

_"So, when Madi transcended Lexa's mind transcended too."_

Atlantis says pulling the brunette out of her dark thoughts and Raven is still amazed at how quickly the woman's mind processes some information sometimes. The Latina nods and looks up at her girlfriend before settling down again.

_"It's the only logical explanation for it, I read some books in Sanctum, and I think that’s how M-Cap worked on Bardo. If we don’t use the full capacity of our brains that means that we have different unexplored areas in our minds, M-Cap unleashed Madi’s memories, even though they weren’t hers because it reached those areas."_

_“You’re saying they were Lexa’s?”_

_“That’s my guess because she had the flame for a longer period, what they did with Madi was to probe into her mind, Becca knew how much of our brain we use, I don’t know how but she managed to make a safe code and when we took the flame out of her the code must have been updated to the mind of the host itself, but because our brains are such complex machines, we didn’t know it, we couldn’t predict it. Madi suddenly had memories that weren’t her own, but she didn’t know how to reach them. In Bardo when they were digging deep into her mind, they brought Lexa’s mind to life.”_

_“Why didn’t she come back right away as the rest of us?”_

Atlantis asks trying to make sense of what her girlfriend is saying, and Raven looks at her deep in thought. This, however, is one question she doesn’t have the answer for, but she can think of a theory, even though it might be farfetched.

_“I don’t know, and I think Lexa won’t be able to answer that either, but maybe when Lexa transcended, she didn’t realize what was happening and I don’t know but maybe while she coexisted in the universe’s conscious, she understood what was happening and decided to come back but her body had perished, she was still the one Clarke saw in the test, I mean she was her judge.”_

_“Clarke told me she saw her even after the test.”_

_“Maybe they were trying to be sure she was worthy.”_

Raven says softly and Atlantis sighs and nods but remains silent for a few beats.

_"I never thought I would see her again."_

Atlantis says in a small voice and Raven moves slightly to cradle to woman's face with her right hand, her thumb running smoothly over soft skin and the woman closes her eyes at the touch.

_"She's here now and I doubt she'll be going anywhere any time soon."_

They both chuckle and Picasso looks at them, the dog is currently laying on the carpet in front of the fireplace, and as if sensing the light mood wags her tail resting her head once more as Atlantis leans in and kisses Raven. It still surprises her how easily Raven's lips mold into hers when they kiss, Raven pulls back slightly and opens her eyes to look deeply into the light brown ones in front of her, the flames flickering in the fireplace make them almost look amber.

_"I love you."_

Raven says for the first time since she and Atlantis became a couple and Atlantis is taken aback by the subject change, her heart hammers against her ribcage as she feels a rush of happiness taking over her body and kisses Raven once more. The Latina smiles into the kiss as she realizes how deep her feelings for the woman are. There will be more questions and theories in the next day but for now, as the afternoon slowly turns into night and the snow starts falling again outside Raven is happy in Atlantis’ arms as they share their love through kisses, smiles, and small touches.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what do you guys think?  
> I hope some of you like it and I hope that for those of you who needed closure this warms your heart a little as it warmed mine!  
> Next chapter will be the last and I want you to know that I am grateful to all of you who have been with me on this work and cheering up for it!


	7. New beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!!!  
> Welcome back to the final chapter of this fic!  
> A quick few notes before we start, as I said at the start, this fic was born out of my personal need for closure after watching the last episode, I picked right after that last scene but I did not follow all the facts of the show. I hope you understand that this was the result of my creativity and my work with my friend Jo (kudos to her as always) but mainly I needed to find a way (even if it doesn't make much sense) to have Lexa back, seeing Alycia putting on the Heda mantle once more and one last time was good but also bittersweet for me and so this fic came to light.  
> I never intended on making a heavy plot, I just needed my favorite characters to be happy and in peace. And because the show ended with a supernatural vibe that I wasn't expecting, I couldn't force myself into dig deeper in that. Instead, I am ending this fic on a lighter note, and in a way an open ending.  
> I'm sorry if you were expecting more, but I hope that for those of you that still cherish Lexa this will make you smile.  
> I have to thank my friend Jo, for her support and encouraging words, if it wasn't for her this work would probably stay just between the two of us and I want to thank all of you for you kudos, comments and kind words.  
> I hope to see you soon!

**Chapter 7 – New beginnings**

Clarke’s mind slowly drifts from complete unconsciousness to a sleepy state, almost fading in and out of that light sleep that one has after staying in bed for long hours. Her body feels rested and her mind is foggy as the blonde rolls over in bed with her eyes still closed and she moves her arms in the bed to find that the space next to hers is empty. She blinks rapidly as she takes in the vacant space next and the cold sheets. There’s a dim light coming through the windows and the blonde doesn’t even remember closing the curtains. Lexa! Clarke opens her eyes fully to realize that her worst fear is now coming to life once more. Lexa was just a dream, but it felt so real, Clarke could swear that she can still smell Lexa’s perfume and she sits in bed as her eyes start to tear up.

_“I’m right here Clarke.”_

Lexa says as if sensing the blonde’s fears and Clarke turns to the right to see Lexa at the kitchen table with the wooden oven already spreading warmth through the house and the brunette making tea. The blonde smiles as Lexa walks towards the bed and offers a cup with herbal tea in it.

_“Be careful it’s still hot.”_

Lexa warns as Clarke nods, placing the mug on the bedside table and watching as Lexa sits in the bed facing her.

_“I thought it was just a dream.”_

The blonde admits brokenly as Lexa grabs one of her hands in her own.

_“It’s real. I can’t believe it either I… one of the last things I remember fully is the City of Light. But I’m here now.”_

Lexa says earnestly as she raises Clarke’s hand to her lips and kisses it softly. Clarke smiles at the tender gesture and looks at Lexa, her Heda symbol is gone now and there’s no war-paint covering her face, it’s simply Lexa with no masks and no debts to her people and Clarke can’t help but relish in the woman’s soft presence and affection.

_“I’m sure the others will have questions. I don’t think I’m ready to share you with them yet.”_

Clarke says with a soft smile and Lexa nods, Clarke can’t help but notice that this Lexa is different from the one she met in the past, she is still the same, but she carries herself with ease now and it shows in how her eyes sparkle without the burden of leading her people.

_“We can stay here for as long as you want. I’m not sure I can go outside either, not yet, I’m not the Commander anymore and yet I’m not ready to face their questions and having to answer them.”_

The brunette says and Clarke nods in understanding, Lexa is back now but there’s so much she probably doesn’t know, and the blonde is not even sure of where to start. Clarke picks up the tea and tries it, to find that it has cooled down a little. The wooden ovens were something that they didn’t know how to use but since almost every house has one along with the fireplace Indra took the time to explain how they can use it to cook and it also helps in keeping the houses warm.

_“You don’t have much food here.”_

Lexa says with a pensive expression and Clarke chuckles slightly, it will be a while before the group can have more than fish and meat, but Miller found some fruits that can at least serve for breakfast.

_“Yeah, we still have a lot to do to have a somewhat normal life in this vast world.”_

Clarke says and Lexa smiles at her taking the mug from Clarke’s hands and placing it on the bedside table with a soft thud.

_“I will help in whatever way I can.”_

Lexa says as she leans in and grazes her lips against Clarke’s, the blonde sighs as she wraps her arms around the woman’s neck and leans her forehead against Lexa’s with a smile.

_“We have many plans for our little village, it won’t be like the Tower at Polis, but I think we will make it work, with less comfort than we are used to, but I think it’s enough for us.”_

_“As long as I’m with you, I can live wherever you deem right and at least you still have candles.”_

Lexa says chuckling slightly and Clarke laughs, she did have a feeling that the amount of candles the brunette had in her room in the tower were a mix of her need and her love for them.

_“It’s so strange to see you like this.”_

_“Like what?”_

Lexa asks frowning slightly at Clarke’s statement and the blonde shrugs slightly, she’s not sure either, but even when they were alone Lexa had always acted as Heda, she could never be just Lexa, and Clarke supposes that as much as Lexa needs to adjust to her new reality on earth, Clarke has to do the same.

_“I don’t know, it’s just I guess we both have to get used to not being on opposite sides of a war.”_

_“Well, I for once am very happy that we don’t have to fight against each other or make our people listen to our arguments about how better it is to be just one in the coalition instead of taking sides and living in fear and fights.”_

At Lexa’s words, Clarke hums and pulls Lexa down onto the bed. The questions of their friends can wait when they still have so much to discover about each other.

**

_“So, I guess Clarke won’t be joining us for our morning meeting…”_

Murphy says with a smirk as Atlantis and Raven walk in, the group is restoring a cabin to meet regularly and spend some time together, in a way it’s a sort of headquarters. The Latina snorts in laughter and nods as she pulls Atlantis towards the chairs with her, the grounder warrior still blushes slightly whenever Raven shows her affection in public but as time passes, she’s getting used to it and is loosening up too.

_“Do we have any theories about what happened? I mean we all thought Lexa had died and that her mind was destroyed when Gabriel destroyed the flame.”_

Octavia comments pragmatically as Echo looks at her with a confused expression.

_“I thought only the living would be able to transcend and come back.”_

The former Azgeda spy says as she looks at Levitt and the man nods at her words as the rest of the group look at him. Levitt had seen Lexa in Madi’s memories and although he never thought much about her, Octavia had told him what she knew about Lexa and her life on earth.

_“That’s what our scriptures said, I’m not entirely sure of how this is possible either.”_

The man says genuinely as Atlantis looks from her girlfriend to him with a proud smile.

_“Raven has a theory about that.”_

The grounder warrior announces as Raven grins and nods placing one kiss on the woman’s cheek and then as Jackson pours tea for everyone, she starts explaining the theory she previously discussed with Atlantis the night before. Jordan pays attention to every single word the Latina says and once in a while makes a comment that backs up Raven’s theory. By the time Raven ends explaining her theory her tea is already cold and Atlantis moves from her chair to refill it with hot one. Levitt looks at Raven slightly surprised but nods as he looks apologetically at Octavia and the younger Blake squeezes his hand.

_“You’re not wrong. As far as I know, it took us a while to understand how the M-cap worked, but we did conclude that the device would dig deep into the subjects’ minds. It is as you say, even our own memories can sometimes be shoved away to almost inaccessible parts of the brain. Let’s say that in normal circumstances someone suffers from trauma and the brain shuts down...”_

_“Like amnesia?”_

Jordan asks and Levitt pauses for a second and then nods at his question.

_“That’s a perfect example, in certain situations a person can have amnesia because the brain damage is so extensive that the memories are indeed lost but in other cases, they are just inaccessible to the person. In Bardo to be able to see those memories we had to be able to map all the brain activity with the M-cap, that’s why I always preferred when the subject willingly cooperated, it’s rather painful when the subject doesn’t want us in their mind.”_

Levitt says as he looks down and Octavia sighs with a nod, she’s fully aware of the process and it wasn’t a pleasant experience. A heavy silence falls upon them as Hope looks sorrowfully at Octavia remembering that both Octavia and her mother were subjected to the same torture in Bardo.

_“So, what you’re saying is that Lexa was still alive in Madi’s mind even though the flame was destroyed?”_

Emori asks trying to make sense of it as Raven nods and Niylah frowns slightly while Indra looks at a loss for words.

_“How’s that possible? I thought that Murphy and Clarke told us that two minds can’t coexist in the same space.”_

Niylah says voicing Indra’s question and Raven pauses to gather her thoughts and explain the best she can, all eyes are on her expectantly and the Latina scratches the back of her head looking around.

_“From what I can understand it is true that on a conscious level they can’t, that’s what happened to Clarke, she was still alive and conscious when Josephine’s mind drive was placed in her, to put it simply, even though nothing about this is simple, Clarke was fighting for control of the same space of mind when she had the mind drive inserted, but in Lexa’s case, she was dormant in a different sector of Madi’s brain. They shared some memories because Madi had the flame and saw them, but they weren’t taking over the same space, it’s like our brain has different drawers, Madi’s own conscious was occupying some but Lexa’s was just stored in some other drawer, maybe in a sort of coma or something, waiting for the time when someone went there and opened it up for her.”_

_“By using the M-cap they unleashed Lexa’s mind into Madi’s.”_

Levitt says and Raven nods as Murphy looks at Emori and clears his throat slightly.

_“When Emori’s body shut down I told Jackson to put her mind drive in me too, that’s why she transcended with us.”_

_“The same happened with Madi, it was such a short period in which their two minds coexisted in the same level, and when Madi transcended Lexa went with her.”_

Raven says nodding at Murphy’s words and Echo sighs.

_“Whoa, even for us that’s a lot to take in. But does that mean that Lexa doesn’t know what happened after her physical death?”_

Echo says as Raven looks at her and thinks, she didn’t think that through but on a logical level she can somewhat make some assumptions.

_“Considering that we think her mind was dormant in a sort of coma, there’s a high chance of that being the case, however in the short time she and Madi were together there’s also the possibility of Lexa having seen some of Madi’s memories too.”_

_“Regardless of Raven’s assumption and considering that sooner or later Clarke and Lexa will join us, I think we should be careful with her; I don’t think pressuring her to find out what she does and doesn’t know it’s a good idea.”_

Atlantis says already showing that she is ready to protect her friend and a pregnant pause falls over the group, the door to the house opens, and soon after Clarke is walking in with a careful Lexa behind her. The blonde shrugs off the snow of her coat and then does the same with Lexa’s as the former commander blushes slightly and the rest of the group shares knowing looks.

_“So, what did we miss?”_

Clarke says noticing the curious looks that are focused on her and Lexa, and Murphy shrugs slightly with a smirk.

_“We were just wondering if you two would leave your place today or not.”_

The young man says as Raven laughs and Clarke glares at them both grabbing Lexa’s hand and pulling her towards the table to sit down with her friends. Levitt looks from Clarke to Lexa; although her face is familiar, he is still unsure of how to approach the person who once was a leader of twelve clans.

_“Raven has a theory that might explain why Lexa is back.”_

Octavia says and Lexa looks at her, she still remembers the sky girl who became a grounder warrior, back then Octavia wasn’t afraid of showing that she didn’t trust Lexa but judging by the way she now smiles invitingly it seems that those times are long gone.

As Levitt and Jordan excitedly start to explain Raven’s theory Niylah and Murphy decide to prepare something for the group to eat and Atlantis, having grown tired of the complexity of the subject, offers to help. Lexa takes the chair next to Raven but remains silent most of the time as the Latina studies her carefully.

_“I’m sure that this is a bit overwhelming but for what it’s worth I’m really happy to know you’re here.”_

The Latina says as Lexa looks at her and nods slightly but remains silent and Raven continues to look at her, if it feels weird for the Latina to be in Lexa’s presence, she can’t imagine how it must be for Lexa.

_“You don’t look so intimidating now.”_

The Latina says again as Clarke looks from Jordan to Raven and glares at her.

_“Raven.”_

The blonde says in a serious tone of voice that is meant to be a warning and both Lexa and Raven look at Clarke as the Latina smiles with a shrug.

_“What?”_

_“You know what.”_

_“Wow, protective much? Don’t worry it’s not like I’m going to give Lexa a big sister’s talk, I know that she came back for you. I have no doubts about her intentions with my best friend.”_

Raven says with a smirk as Clarke shakes her head focusing her attention back on Jordan and Levitt once more while Lexa looks confused with everything that it’s going on. A while later when the food is being served and everyone gathers around the table, Clarke has a better idea of what happened to make Lexa’s return possible but if the blonde has to be honest, she doesn’t care much.

As everyone starts to eat their lunch Lexa observes the people, she can’t help but feel strange though, some of the people there she knows from her past life, like Murphy who was in her room when she died, Octavia and Raven were in TonDC and Lexa realizes that their memories together are not pleasant, especially her memories of Raven tied up and receiving a punishment she never deserved. But then there’s Levitt and Jordan who although Lexa never met before she can’t help but think that they are somehow familiar. Jordan and Levitt had mentioned that she might have some memories that aren’t quite hers and as Lexa forces another piece of meat down her throat, she feels suddenly nauseated.

_“I… I need to get some air.”_

The former commander says pushing her chair back as she stands, and everyone looks startled at her sudden movement. Clarke makes a move to stand too but Atlantis is quicker, and she places one hand on the blonde’s shoulder to assuage her worries.

_“I’ll go with her, don’t worry, I’m sure she’s just feeling overwhelmed with all the information.”_

The grounder warrior says as Raven smiles kindly at her and nods, never in her life, she would think she would once more be seated at the same table as Lexa let alone being concerned about her wellbeing and so she tries to calm Clarke down noticing how distressed the blonde is looking.

_“She’s probably just getting used to this and she might have memories that aren’t quite her own, Atlantis although unfamiliar with it knows that it’s hard to be almost thrown at a group of people she barely knows.”_

Raven says and Clarke looks around, the group is still silent, and the blonde looks at Indra’s concerned face, Gaia nods, her knowledge of the flame is almost useless now, but she can see that Lexa needs a couple of minutes to breathe. Clarke squeezes Atlantis’s hand that is still on her shoulder in thanks and watches as the woman quickly walks out of the house.

**

Once outside Atlantis puts her coat on and looks around and at the ground, in the snow, it’s easy to pinpoint the direction Lexa took and she strides forward to catch up with her friend. A few feet away from her, Lexa is standing almost in the middle of the village looking around with a lost expression, the woman hugs her torso in a clear indication that the cold is seeping into her bones, it doesn’t help that the jacket she’s wearing it’s not the most appropriate for the winter.

_“Hey, are you okay?”_

Atlantis asks carefully as she approaches Lexa, speaking softly as to not startle her and Lexa turns around and sighs.

_“I don’t know, I was fine, but then Octavia said something, and I saw some flashes crossing my mind, I never met this Levitt or Jordan and yet I was seeing them in my mind and I just felt sick.”_

_“That’s okay; you have every right and reason to be confused. Jackson is a doctor though; do you want me to call him to check on you?”_

_“No, please don’t, the last thing I want it’s someone I don’t know yet to be treating me like a child.”_

Lexa says shivering slightly but in the same Heda tone she used to use in Polis and Atlantis nods in understanding.

_“What about a coat?”_

_“What?”_

_“You look like you could use a different coat right now.”_

Atlantis says simply with a clever new approach and Lexa smiles, it’s a genuine curl of her lips as she looks down at herself.

_“Yeah, well this is Clarke’s.”_

The woman says and Atlantis nods, she would have guessed as much, Lexa was soaking wet the day before, and the blonde probably gave her some of her own clothes to wear, although the jacket is a bit loose at the chest, the sleeves are a little short for Lexa’s arms and so at her friends offer she nods.

_“Well let’s go then, I don’t have many clothes, but we got enough to last us, you and I are almost the same size so I’m sure you can keep some of mine.”_

The walk to Atlantis’ cabin is a short one and made in silence, as the grounder opens the door, she tells Lexa to sit on the couch proudly stating that she restored it herself. Lexa does as she was told, and Atlantis revives the fire in the fireplace to heat the space as Lexa watches how she moves around with grace and ease.

_“How do you do it?”_

Lexa asks looking at Atlantis who is now placing a few sets of clothes on her bed and then stops to look quizzically at Lexa.

_“Do what?”_

_“Adjust; this life… it’s…it’s so different from what I remember.”_

Lexa says in a small voice and Atlantis grabs a coat and walks towards the couch to hand it over for Lexa to take.

_“It’s different and maybe I saw more than you in the time you were away, but Clarke’s friends, they are good people, we were never that different in many ways and we’re all a part of the same species, they can be loud and even annoying at times but we’re all a big family now. Our lives are different, but we live in peace now with people we love, we just have to remind ourselves that now we can do and be whoever we want. You’re not Heda or the commander of the coalition, you’re just Lexa and you can now live with Clarke, you don’t have to be alone anymore.”_

Atlantis says as she urges Lexa to try on the coat and as the woman does so she smiles, her friend is right, she doesn’t have to figure everything out now, she can simply be, she can enjoy herself in a world of freedom and she has Clarke by her side to do it with her. To be commander was to be alone, that was always Lexa’s belief, until Clarke, the blonde had always defied Lexa’s personal beliefs and Titus’ lessons. As Lexa tries on the coat and looks down at herself, she thinks about her past life, she wonders if she would have been able to maintain peace, she believes she would and that Clarke would have still been by her side, in a way the blonde has always been.

Even when Clarke succeeded where Lexa had failed, killing the mountain men, where others saw that as a personal affront to Heda, Lexa saw it for what it was, the need to survive, she’s not sure if she will ever be able to tell Clarke that leaving her behind in that night on the mountain is her deepest regret, but she knows that if she hadn’t done so she would still be able to save her people because of the blonde. It took Lexa some time to see it, but when Clarke was in Polis, she truly realized that Clarke was her equal, a sort of Commander in her own way and without a flame, and now they don’t have to burden their shoulders with the entire fate of their people. Looking at Atlantis as the woman nods at her, Lexa smiles, she fought to come back, that much she remembers, she was kept alive somehow for this one chance of true happiness and if having memories in her that aren’t quite her own and having a different life is what she has to do she will do it in a heartbeat.

**

As Atlantis leaves the group a heavy silence falls upon the people around the table, everyone is unsure of what to do or say and Clarke notices how Indra’s eyes keep glancing at the door in worry. As Clarke plays with the food on her plate, she lets Raven’s theory sink in her mind, as if waiting for the other shoe to drop the blonde turns to Jackson and calls the doctor’s attention.

_“Jackson?”_

The blonde says as the man looks up at her and Clarke sighs as everyone looks at the blonde’s serious expression.

_“Do you… considering that Raven is right, that Madi and Lexa coexisted, do you think she can have some kind of… injury?”_

The man seems to think about her words and then frowns at Clarke’s question looking from Levitt to Clarke with a careful expression.

_“You mean like brain damage?”_

_“I… I mean… I don’t know. I know how hard it was to fight Josephine when she was in my mind, Lexa was fine and then suddenly she just left. What if something’s wrong?”_

The blonde says remembering Lexa’s pale face from a few minutes ago and even Madi’s reluctance to leave her, and Jackson looks from her to Levitt again as the other man looks at him at the loss for words and the doctor sighs.

_“I don’t know Clarke; this is a bit beyond my expertise. Levitt is probably more capable of telling you something.”_

_“Honestly, I wouldn’t know, we know the effects of M-cap on the subject we had under it, but Lexa, her mind was dormant, and she wasn’t in her own body, I don’t think that it would affect her physically.”_

The man says and Raven gulps, she remembers that even when she didn’t have the chip in her body she suffered from seizures from its effects, but it was still her body and she doesn’t want to make Clarke worry more than she already is and so she stays silent.

_“We could take her to Bardo to perform some exams on her if you want to.”_

Levitt says after a few seconds in silence and Clarke is about to agree when she remembers that just before Lexa came back the higher being appeared to her to tell her that they wouldn’t be able to use the stones anymore. Before the blonde can think about something to say aware that everyone will think she’s crazy if she tells the truth the door opens and Lexa walks in with Atlantis as they talk with relieved and smiling faces, Clarke immediately stands and approaches the two women frowning when she notices Lexa is wearing a different coat.

_“Is everything alright?”_

The blonde asks and Lexa notices as everyone goes silent as they look at her and she nods at Clarke with a soft small smile just like the ones she would share with the blonde in Polis.

_“Everything is perfect. Atlantis was telling me about a greenhouse you’re planning on building to grow some things.”_

_“Yeah, we’ll use my father’s notes.”_

Jordan says from the table and Lexa nods as she walks further forward grabbing Clarke’s hand in the process, the blonde is taken aback by Lexa’s public gesture of affection but squeezes the brunette’s hand in her own as they sit back down again and start to discuss Jordan’s plan. After her conversation with Atlantis and some time away from the commotion of being around everyone else, Lexa feels substantially calmer and slightly more prepared to face the group of people and perhaps maybe even engage in some conversations. Atlantis was kind enough to briefly explain a little bit about everyone else and smirked slightly when the former commander admitted that she didn’t even want to talk to Clarke about it the night before.

_“That’s Atlantis’s coat.”_

Clarke says almost whispering near Lexa’s ear as if to not interrupt the conversation of her friends and Lexa nods moving her shoulders slightly to put some emphasis on her next words.

_“Yeah, she kind of brought to my attention that I didn’t have the best clothes to wear today or in the future days ahead for that matter.”_

Lexa says and Clarke smiles and looks at the other woman with a gentle expression.

_“She’s surprisingly kind despite everything that has happened to her.”_

_“She has always been like this, I don’t know how she managed, living away from the tribe, hiding who she really was…”_

Lexa says trailing off and Clarke looks at her with a surprised expression.

_“You know about her blood? Aden?”_

_“I was never sure, but I had my suspicions even if she tried to hide it well.”_

_“What are you two whispering about?”_

Raven says from her spot at the table and Lexa smirks slightly looking at her.

_“Just talking about your girlfriend, you got lucky Reyes.”_

Lexa says and the banter comes out astonishingly easily, Atlantis blushes as Raven beams and leans in to kiss the woman’s cheek.

_“I’m aware. Did she tell you she defeated a bear?”_

Raven says looking from Atlantis to Lexa as the brunette frowns and shakes her head.

_“A bear?”_

Lexa asks looking at Atlantis as the woman shrugs her shoulders and looks down at her hands.

_“Technically, all I did was put the bear to sleep.”_

Atlantis mumbles as Lexa looks from her to Raven and the Latina shakes her head and tells Lexa the full story, the former Commander listens to it in silence, but she doesn’t seem surprised by the mention of wild animals and Jordan looks at her.

_“Did you always live so close to wildlife?”_

The young man asks, they have had this conversation before at the time of Atlantis’ attack, but he wants to hear the brunette’s point of view considering who she was, and Lexa shakes her head thinking of her past life as an initiate and then as Heda.

_“Not often, but we were aware of them, there were some animals like Pauna that always haunted the forests.”_

_“Pauna?”_

Hope asks with a curious expression and Lexa looks at Clarke as the blonde sighs, that’s a memory of a long time ago, it seems so long ago that it feels like it was in a past life.

_“Pauna was a gorilla or something, an enormous one.”_

_“Back then the radiation effects had a big impact, remember that two-head deer we saw just when we landed? Not to mention that snake or whatever it was in the lake.”_

Octavia says as Clarke nods and Jordan and Hope can’t help themselves but fire question after question as Clarke, Lexa, and Octavia tell them about their encounters with the wild animals. As everyone gets engaged in the conversation Atlantis and Echo start to collect the plates and things from the table and the snow starts falling outside. Miller puts more wood in the fireplace, and everyone stays in the warm cabin as the fireplace crackles with the burning wood. The conversations flow easily from subject to subject, plans are made and shared and Lexa feels at ease.

**

After an afternoon spent talking and playing games in the cabin Clarke and the others say goodnight and go to their respective houses, Gaia and Indra decide to take Picasso with them for a short walk before going to their home, and Clarke thanks them and turns away with Lexa behind her. Indra looks at Lexa and the brunette nods as if to tell her that they will have time to talk in the future and Indra smiles as she understands the silent message.

As Lexa watches Clarke open the door to the house she smiles. Her life might be different now, but she will have the chance to spend it with the blonde and Lexa couldn’t have imagined in her wildest dreams that this would be a possibility, to live in peace with the one she loves and a large group of friends.

_“You’re okay?”_

Clarke asks softly as Lexa steps inside and the woman nods at the question, at the blonde’s inquisitive look Lexa sighs and walks up to her and holds one of her hands.

_“It was just a taxing day, I think that I need some time to adjust to being around them, Jordan seems nice, but Raven and Murphy can be very loud at times.”_

Lexa says and Clarke chuckles slightly cradling Lexa’s face with a smile.

_“That is true, but you’ll get used to them, I’m sure.”_

Clarke says as she looks at the bag Lexa left near the door and frowns, the brunette follows her gaze and smiles.

_“I don’t have any more clothes than the ones I was wearing; Atlantis was kind enough to give me some of her own.”_

_“I suppose mine weren’t the best choice, but you know I don’t mind if you don’t wear anything at all either.”_

Clarke says with a teasing smile looking at Lexa with desire, the brunette blushes slightly and Clarke leans in to kiss her. They kiss slowly as they start walking towards the bed and Lexa takes Clarke’s clothes off with gentle touches, the burning passion still present as the previous night, but something feels different somehow. Whereas in the day before Clarke was afraid that it was all a dream or a trick that led Clarke to feel a sort of desperation, at this moment she feels a deep sense of happiness.

As the night falls over the village Clarke and Lexa let themselves fall into the familiar routine of exploring their bodies with their hands and wandering touches. Their skins hot and sweaty in the dance that takes over their bodies and when Clarke cums in Lexa’s mouth and fingers she breathes out Lexa’s name like a reverent prayer. It doesn’t take long for Clarke to take Lexa over the edge too and when their carnal needs are satiated and their bodies numb from pleasure, Clarke pulls the covers of the bed covering their naked bodies as she holds Lexa close and promises to never let her go out of sight. They fall asleep peacefully with the promise that in the next day they will do it all over again.

**

Winter had hit the group hard and with it the weather caused some damage in the village, as the days passed by the group occupied themselves with small tasks trying to fix little things here and there as they could. On the worst days in which thunderstorms, strong winds, or snow were a constant presence all day the group would rather spend some time together to have a meal, play games, and hang out or would just stay indoors enjoying themselves. Thanks to Clarke’s and Murphy’s recovered books the group took upon reading as a pastime. Raven would often be tinkering in her cabin as Atlantis would busy herself with some book or some small things inside too. Clarke took up painting as a hobby and although she was scared, she let Lexa read some of the pages of her diary.

With Lexa adjusting to her new life so different from what she knew and learning about Clarke’s life and making sense of the memories she had that weren’t quite hers but in her all the same she settled with Clarke and the others and soon enough she was included in the group’s tasks. Lexa had settled in hunting routines with Atlantis, Echo, and Indra and the older woman had an opportunity to help Lexa as she always did when the brunette was Heda.

Winter slowly faded and turned to spring and the sunny days despite chilly became longer and allowed the group to work longer hours, although no one complained during winter the truth was that everyone longed for days in which they could enjoy nature and be outside.

**

It’s the end of a long day of work and Lexa and Clarke walk out of their cabin after having showered and changed clothes to find Atlantis and Raven waiting for them. Lexa smiles at the couple and then kisses Clarke on the cheek and goes for a walk with Atlantis, it has become a sort of routine between them and as the blonde watches them go with a smile she sits on the stairs and Raven sits next to her with a kind smile.

_“Those two seem like sisters.”_

The Latina says and Clarke can’t help but nod, since Lexa returned, the blonde has been having the chance to know more about Lexa’s past. Clarke has been by Lexa’s side nurturing her as the former Commander adjusts to her new life and Atlantis has been with them in each step. The two grounders falling easily into their friendship and they are finally able to be friends with no need to hide who they are and how they feel. Although Indra is close to Lexa, the blonde can see that the former commander is more comfortable in confining with Atlantis and Clarke is grateful for their friendship, sometimes the brunette still closes herself off even to Clarke, but Atlantis always manages to get through to her and Clarke admires her even more for it.

_“I like that, both of them need the support and they have basically known each other since they were kids.”_

Clarke says and Raven smiles and leans closer to Clarke with a happy smile.

_“Who would’ve thought that we would be here today both happy and loved?”_

Raven asks as Clarke nods deep in thought, she would never have believed that the blonde teenager who once was drawing the mountains and the sun on the floor of her skybox would live happily in the scenery her mind dreamed of.

**

Lexa walks silently with Atlantis by her side, it has become a sort of ritual between the two of them, they sometimes do some workouts in the mornings, with Echo, Hope, and Octavia, and although they don’t need to do it, it always makes them feel better. Fighting skills are no longer needed but it’s a hard habit to let go, the rush of training helps their bodies and aligns their minds, Gaia and Clarke usually meditate but more often than not Raven, Niylah and Clarke find themselves watching as the warriors fight each other and Echo even manages to get Raven to join them and Atlantis always enjoys it, she can see that her girlfriend and Echo have good chemistry when it comes to their training sessions, something that Raven explained that it was reminiscing of her time with Echo and the others in space.

Even though Atlantis enjoys her time training with the other women especially because both Echo and Octavia are completely comfortable with her and Lexa now, one of the things she likes more is to take long walks through the forest after a day’s work, sometimes Clarke and Lexa join her and the former commander had soon understood why her friend enjoy it so much, the calm and peace that comes with living in harmony with each other and the nature around them is soothing.

They come to a stop in a clearing and look around, they can hear the night animals as the night comes to cast a dark blue color over the sky and Atlantis sits down on a fallen tree and Lexa does the same. The clearing is at a higher point and from it they can see the village a little below, the cabins have some lights around them, courtesy of Raven’s and Jordan’s skills and with the lights, they can already see the smoke coming out of the chimney of the common cabin.

_“I never thought this could be possible.”_

Atlantis says with a soft smile looking down at the village and she can imagine Raven and Murphy teasing each other while doing whatever they might be doing in the cabin. Lexa looks at her and sighs.

_“I know, after all we endured, our old ways and what they made us do…”_

_“It’s all in the past now.”_

Atlantis says as she notices Lexa’s expression turning a little sad and the former commander looks at her with a pained expression.

_“Your ability to always see the light has always mesmerized me you know?”_

Lexa says and Atlantis frowns looking at her friend’s green eyes as Lexa smiles and sighs looking down at the village.

_“You were forced to live in hiding, you lost your family and you never had the chance to see your brother grow up and become the amazing wise man we both know he would be, and after years of suffering you still carry the same hopeful expression that I saw in you when we were kids.”_

Lexa says and Atlantis’s frown deepens as she takes in Lexa’s words.

_“You knew?”_

The woman asks surprised and Lexa looks at her with a sad expression and a curt nod.

_“It took me a while to figure it out, you were always so secretive, you never told me exactly where you lived, you never let me see your wounds whenever we got hurt on a training session, when Aden moved to Polis, I saw you two together and I saw how similar you both were in so many little things, even in the way he picked up a sword he reminded me of you.”_

Lexa says and Atlantis’ eyes tear up at the mention of her brother, a sense of nostalgia dawning down on her as she wipes her eyes with the sleeves of her jacket, and Lexa can’t help but feel a rush of emotion towards this woman who endured so much almost alone, she didn’t have the burden of the flame in her and yet she carried a burden because of it nonetheless.

_“I think he knew about you, he never told me, but I think he knew that you were his sister and he tried to enjoy every moment with you because of that. He would always tell me about what you two have done and what he was learning with you, he often talked to me about how we could change the ways to have a new commander, he knew how harsh our world was and especially to the ones who were born with the Nightblood.”_

_“He admired you too, whenever I came to Polis, he would talk about everything you had taught him smiling proudly at the fact that you often spent hours reading with him and the others. I miss him; my parents and my aunt had at least the chance to live and die according to our ways but Aden, he deserved better.”_

Atlantis says crying a little at the end, broken and sad, she rarely talks about her family, besides when she told Clarke and Raven who she was, she has kept her feelings pretty much bottled up inside herself but now with Lexa’s words she can’t help but cry and let herself mourn for the loss of her brother. Lexa’s eyes tear up at the memories being invoked and in a surprise gesture, she pulls Atlantis into a hug as the woman cries clutching the fabric of Lexa’s jacket, and the woman carved in sharp edges and strong words sniffles too. It takes a while for Atlantis’ tears to stop rolling down on her face, she cries quietly but with the pent-up emotion of several years.

_“I… I’m sorry.”_

Atlantis mumbles after a while in silence as she moves from Lexa’s embrace, a part of her surprised at Lexa’s caring gesture of holding her close, not because she isn’t a gentle person but because she never allowed others to see her like that and this realization makes another part of Atlantis to feel ashamed.

_“You have nothing to apologize for, I think… it wasn’t my intention to make you crumble like this, but I think it might have been cathartic, for both of us.”_

Lexa says softly and gently, and Atlantis looks up to notice that her friend’s eyes are a little puffy and red too. They stay sitting on the fallen tree a while longer gathering their emotions and composing their faces and it’s only when the wind blows past them causing Atlantis to shiver that Lexa stands and holds out one hand for her friend to take.

_“Come on; let’s go before Clarke and Raven send everyone after us.”_

Lexa says with a small smile playing on her lips and Atlantis’s eyes sparkle at the mention of the Latina, she takes Lexa’s hand to help her get up, and although she doesn’t need it, she thanks her for the gesture. The air around them feels oddly lighter as if their simple conversation broke the last barrier of secrets in their friendship.

**

When Lexa returns with Atlantis to the common cabin Clarke immediately notices that something happened, she can’t pinpoint what but looking closer she can see that Atlantis eyes are a little red and she walks towards Lexa taking her cold hands in her own and looking at her with deep curious blue eyes.

_“Is everything alright?”_

Clarke asks in a whisper for only Lexa to hear and the brunette smiles at her kissing her on the cheek, despite the chilly wind outside the cabin is warm and cozy and everyone is already getting ready to eat.

_“Everything is exactly as it should be considering our circumstances.”_

The brunette says as she squeezes Clarke’s hands in her own and Clarke looks at Atlantis as if for confirmation, the grounder warrior nods with a smile as Clarke sighs. They make their way to the table and start to have their meal, now they have more than grilled meat or fish, they have veggies and even some small potatoes and after a long day of work, everyone starts eating in silence marveling in the wonders of their hard labor.

During the dinner everyone has a good time, they talk, they laugh, and Murphy and Raven even manage to convince Lexa to have a glass of moonshine, the former commander hates it but drinks it regardless of its strong taste, just to make Raven shut up and to silence Murphy who seemed to be challenging her. Clarke watches in amusement as both Atlantis and Lexa make distasteful faces at the drink and soon after Lexa and Murphy are pretty engrossed in a chess game.

The young man had avoided the game for weeks, chess became a symbol of Sheidheda’s evil plans and John Murphy couldn’t even face the board, it was only when he saw Lexa trying to teach Atlantis and Hope playing that he couldn’t help himself and interject in every game. Indra is surprisingly a good player too, but Raven for all her genius mind simply can’t focus on the game for too long claiming it’s too boring. Murphy enjoys it though; he enjoys the time to think about every move and carefully planning his plays as he tries to guess Lexa’s.

_“Checkmate!”_

The man says as Jackson claps his hands and Miller yawns.

_“Alright, I’m calling a day.”_

Jackson says pulling Miller from his chair and almost dragging him out of the cabin to their home. Murphy smirks at Lexa as the former commander rolls her eyes.

_“I want a rematch.”_

The woman says and Clarke shakes her head.

_“No more games today, it’s late, Emori is already at home and we should go home too.”_

Clarke says and Murphy looks at the blonde.

_“Since when were you the one in charge?”_

The man asks with a smirk and Clarke shrugs smugly as she pulls Lexa out of her chair and smiles at Murphy.

_“Since always!”_

The blonde says and Lexa smiles, she can see that the blonde’s words are meant to be friendly banter, and even though that was something that Lexa was never familiar with she now sees that it’s a common occurrence in the group she finds herself a part of and to be honest she wouldn’t change it for anything in the world.

_“Oh, Clarke, can you… can you check on Emori tomorrow? She has been feeling tired, and she gets sick in the mornings… She refuses to see Jackson, but I figure that with you… she might let you examine her…”_

Murphy trails off as Lexa looks at Clarke with a knowing expression and the blonde nods at him before she walks out thinking about the man’s words and Lexa’s expression.

**

Once in the blonde’s house that it is now as much Lexa’s as it is Clarke’s the brunette busies herself with the fireplace while Clarke makes some tea for them both. Lexa sits on the couch next to the fireplace and sighs, the days aren’t as cold as before, but the nights are still chilly, and Lexa enjoys the feeling of the burning wood leaving a sweet scent around the house as the room starts to feel warmer and cozier.

Clarke sits down next to Lexa and the brunette immediately pulls her closer to her body and the blonde goes willingly with a soft smile as she snuggles closer to Lexa and nuzzles her on the neck as Lexa chuckles slightly.

_“I’ll never get tired of listening to your laugh.”_

Clarke says earnestly and Lexa down at her with a soft expression.

_“I never laughed as much as now.”_

The former commander says with a soft expression and Clarke kisses her on the neck and nuzzles her again as Lexa chuckles again and the blonde smiles into Lexa’s skin as she trails one hand over Lexa’s sides and the woman starts laughing much to Clarke’s delight.

_“Clarke stop.”_

Lexa whines and Clarke moves on the couch, the tea forgotten on the small coffee table as Clarke starts tickling Lexa’s side amused at the brunette’s laugh. She will forever cherish these moments with Lexa because even though the brunette is slowly opening up to the rest of the group, she is still a little closed off at times and Clarke is the only one who can see her like this. It might sound stupid but a possessive part of her loves that just like it was in their past there’s a part of Lexa that’s only for Clarke.

_“I really love your laugh you know?”_

Clarke says after a while when they are both panting from their silly movements and laughter as Lexa cradles the woman’s face in her hands and kisses her. Clarke is still very much on top of Lexa, but even so they remain in the intimate position seeking nothing more than to be close, there will be other times to pursue the heat of their bodies that make their blood burn with desire, for now it’s just the two of them savoring their time alone.

_“You made a knowing expression when Murphy was asking me to see Emori, care to tell me what is on your mind?”_

Clarke asks as they rest in the couch entangled in each other and Lexa sighs, she moves one hand up and down the blonde’s back and Clarke lifts her head slightly to look at the brunette.

_“I’m just thinking, when I came back a thought was drilled into my mind, a thought about second chances, about how worthy you have proven to be. For what I remember and what you told me when the others came back these higher beings told you that we would be the last of our kind, but…”_

_“Emori’s symptoms… you think she’s carrying a child?”_

Clarke asks in surprise and Lexa nods with a sigh, both women let this new hopeful idea sink in as they lay in silence, Clarke can’t stop but think that from all those times the higher being came to her they were seeking something, at first Clarke thought it was just about Lexa’s return but maybe it was more than that. Lexa moves slightly to look at Clarke and smiles.

_“I love you Clarke from the sky people.”_

There are times where voicing those words it’s enough to make them both cry in happiness and as Clarke leans down to kiss Lexa with all the love and passion she feels inside her, she can only thank the higher beings that allowed her this second chance. Their paths were long and torturous, they both lost and fought and did unspeakable things, but even if they didn’t all make it, it is still worth it for the ones who did and had the second chance they always wanted. And if it turns out that Emori is expecting a child maybe this is more than a second chance, this will be a new beginning.

**The end.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it's the end!  
> Let me know what you think on the comments below, kudos are also appreciated.  
> Now I'm not sure if any of you even read these notes but I want to tell you that right now I'm working on two different fics: one Clexa and another one a Supercorp one. I can't be sure which one I will post first or when but I want you to know that more is on the way, so, if you interested in it just let me know because although writing is a passion I always enjoy to have some feedback and support.  
> Thanks guys!  
> May we meet again!

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


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